Dreams and Nightmares the story of Alexis

Chapter Four

Exploring Deep Waters

“Morning mom”. “How was your night?”

“Oooo, someone woke up on the right side of her bed today”. Replies mom “My night was ok thank you”. “I can see you’re so excited this morning”. “Tell me did Jamal call you last night?”

“Mom, I already told you Jamal and I are just friends or study buddies so to say”. “Nothing more”

“Okay”. “If you say so”, “I made French toast, have some before it gets cold”

“Thanks Mom, you’re the best”. “You want to know why am happy? Well that’s because my birthday is the day after tomorrow; am turning 14” I reply in excitement

“Hold on Mom you didn’t forget did you? I ask

Mum is trying to evade the question so she walks briskly into the kitchen and pretends to be doing something.

“Oh my goodness Mom!” “You totally forgot” I laugh at her actions “And you can’t even deny it”

“No I did not”. She lies “I was just waiting for when you’ll be ready”

I enter the kitchen and stare into her eyes that seem to be avoiding me now “That’s so not true Mom, The you I know would’ve started making plans for a party”

“Alright, you win”. “It skipped my mind Kind of, but it’s not too late preparations can still be made for a party”... “We’ll plan all of that when you’re back from school”. “In the meantime finish up so you can catch the bus”

“Okay Mom”

My name is Alexis canton, over the past few months things have taken a turn in my life; some negative, others positive. But the best thing yet is that I have friend, Jamal. I think am in love with Jamal I can’t really say because love is such a complex word .I can’t wait to turn 14 in two days’ time; perhaps Jamal will see me in a different light…

It takes the school bus about 30 minutes to arrive my house bus stop because of the other bus stop it has to stop at to pick students. Today the school bus is unusually full today and as i enter the almost crowded bus I try to spot Jamal. I notice he’s sitting in the back seat with a couple of other students; who i am guessing are his classmates. Trina is also sitting by his side so uncomfortably close to him.

Katrina which she shortened to Trina is the school’s representative and a two time winner of the mathathon. The mathathon is a Mathematics competition between classes in the school and then between schools. They say she is even more privileged than the Head girl of the school. And as if that wasn’t enough she is pretty too.

They seem to be having a good time because time after time they burst out in laughter. Jamal didn’t notice me enter the bus so I sneak out to the front of the bus where I see an empty spot.

After making myself comfortable o the leather seat I glance back at Jamal. Him and Trina seem to be getting along well. I try to keep myself distracted but how? No home work to do. And Mimi doesn’t take the bus. What to do, what to do.

After much thought, I decide to start a conversation with the girl beside me who is chewing gum ever so loudly. But as though she read my mind she starts talking to me.

“They look great together don’t they?” she says

I turn to the sound of her voice “What?”

“I mean the exchange student and Trina”. She continues “Don’t they look good together?”

My heart skips a beat and I am tempted to ask what! Again but then I reply her coolly

“I guess so”

“People say they’ve been dating for almost a week now” she pops a gum bubble and continues “They say they might be going to represent the school in the Mathathon with BrickHall schools”. “Great right?”

“Yeah, I guess” I am totally transfixed with all the information i am hearing that my answers are limited to ‘Yeah’ and ‘I guess so’

“Too bad for me though, he was one I had my eyes on, but they say he’s only interested in the smart ones, the really smart ones”. “He must’ve some kind of connection with them”

This girl is really a talkative, saying so much when I am saying so little. Still grateful for the information though. She looks like one of the gossip girls. They sure are a wild group. Well this one sure is, her nails have nail polish, and of course she’s wearing makeup when that is totally prohibited in school.

“Why are you looking at me that way?” she asks “You know the Exchange dude?”

“Not really” I lie “Just seen him a couple of times”

“Well he’s someone you should avoid”. She continues “It’s one smart girl to the other” “you seem like a decent girl so you should leave him for girls like us, who can handle him” “No offence”

“None taken” I reply her trying to conceal my fury. Everything is taking its place. Now I get why Jamal said I am too young to have any interest in me. He must think I am so naïve in that aspect.

The bus finally stops at the school premises and I pick up my bag to alight immediately. I am so upset I don’t even care if Jamal sees me or not. All I know is that I don’t even want to be in the same place as he. The bus.

“Marilyn here, it was nice talking with you” she says also picking up her backpack “what’s your name?”

Would you really call that a conversation, you were doing all the talking,

“Alexis” I reply “Same here”

“Alright Alex, see you around” with that she intercepts me and Joins the cue forming at the bus exit.

I actually heard all this things about Jamal I didn’t know about. I can’t believe him. He was too good to be true. Still deep in my thoughts while strolling to the cue I hear Jamal call

“Alexis”. “I knew that was you” he walks up to me “What’s up”

Jamal you’re like the last person I want to see right now. I am so filled with fury that I can’t even look into his eyes.

“I am fine thank you” I reply angrily making my way through the now crowded cue

Time seems to be moving fast today. Because we’re in the last period before break time already and I can’t even recall all we have done so far. All I can think about is what I heard about Jamal. It must be all true or some part of it is. Girls don’t just talk, something must’ve provoked it. I wonder could I have seen this would happen and ignored it instead. Could this be what the dream meant?

The bell for break time rings and everyone is excited to go for break as they quickly rush out of the class as soon as the teacher leaves. I don’t feel like going for break. I just want to be left alone to my thoughts. Or someone to talk to, which ever goes.

Just then Mimi nudges me in the side in her usual fashion bringing me back to reality. “Hey, aren’t you going to the cafeteria?” she asks

“No Mimi not today” I reply almost inaudible to even myself talk more of her

“Why not?” she asks again taking the seat beside me “Are you alright?” “Menstrual cramps?”

“Am fine Mimi”, “Now go, I know you want to go to the cafeteria and gossip” I say trying to force a smile

“Hey”, “Hey, I may not be the best friend ever, but I know when someone’s lying to me and not just anyone, you”. She continues “Tell me, what’s the matter”, “I am hungry but I won’t go and eat until you have told me something”. “And that will be on your head” she jokes

“Okay”, “Okay fine I’ll say something so that you can go and eat”. I reply “It’s about Jamal; I heard stuff about him that he wouldn’t have wanted me to know”. “I mean all this while I thought he was different in a way I think”. “He’s dating Trina”

I wipe out the tears forming in my eyes and Mimi scooches over to hug me. “It’s okay Alex let it out”. “What else did you hear?”

I narrate to Mimi all Marilyn said on the bus. She listens with keen interest that I am surprised. The Mimi I know would make you fast forward your speech until it has lost its essence. But today she’s being the friend I thought I didn’t have. After narrating the whole story to her she finally speaks

“Look Alex, from what you have said it is obvious you’ve started listening to what people are gossiping about”. “This is so unlike you” she continues

“I mean, just because some chick says it doesn’t mean it’s true”. “I hang out with the gossip girls a times and I know how they tend to over exaggerate certain things”.

“Don’t get me wrong I am not saying she wasn’t speaking the truth but I am not saying she was saying the right things either”. “So you should just confront Jamal about it and hear what he has to say before acting out of spite or hatred”

I sniff back a tear and finally manage to reply her

“Too late, I already walked out on him at the bus”. “I don’t even wish to talk to him”

“I mean what do I care anyway?” “We are not dating; he made it clear the other time”. “I shouldn’t even be crying over what I heard about him, it doesn’t make sense”

I wipe my face with my hanky and look at Mimi “How do I look?”

“You look red” she replies laughing “see why I always say don’t cry where anyone can see you”

“Don’t worry I am fine now, I just needed to talk”. I say reassuringly “Sis’ before Bros remember”

“You’re really into him aren’t you? She asks while rising to her feet

“Not anymore I am not” I reply “Thanks for your concern”. “I’ll be in the science lab”

With that we both leave the classroom, I head towards the laboratory while Mimi heads to the cafeteria.

In the Laboratory is where the geeks loved to hang out. I go to the locker room and put on a lab coat, a pair of goggles and gloves. And when I step out I see Jamal just entering the lab, it seems like he’s looking for someone or something because he’s looking around. He hasn’t seen me yet so I duck by the cupboards of beakers as though looking for something. What’s he doing here? Isn’t there a place to go without a trace of Jamal? If I hold up this act for longer then he might give up and leave.

“Hi Alex, what are you doing?”

I stand up and straighten out on hearing the familiar voice. Oh s**t how did he find me? Those freaky geeks must’ve told him, oh curse them and their goggles!

“Hi Jamal, I was just trying to get a beaker”. I reply uncomfortably “I am trying out a couple of experiments”

“Uhm! Okay?!” “Some girl said that I could find you here”, “Mimi, your Friend I guess”. She said you wanted to talk to me?

“Yeah, that’s Mimi alright” I reply studying him as the words of Marilyn flashes in my mind. He seems somewhat agitated in composure.

“So? What did you want to talk about? He asks “Before that may I ask the reason for the way you behaved today on the bus?” “I was trying to talk to you and you walked out on me”

“Are you for some reason upset with me?” He asks while stepping forward and raising the goggles from my face.

“No I am not”, I lie “I just want to be alone”

“And why is that?” Jamal asks “Nobody like to be alone, so why do you want to be alone all of a sudden?”

“It’s nothing”, I reply “just like that”

“Okay, if you say so”. He says as he turns his back to leave “Take care of you”

I watch him as he leaves the lab while I brush a tear from my cheek before going back to my work. After spending the remaining break period in the science lab I return to class on an empty stomach for the rest of the subjects we have today.

I figured it was a bad idea to have skipped break time and not have any food. I am so hungry that I feel dizzy. The French toast I had this morning has long expired. The teacher is rounding up his lessons plan. Oh thank goodness! He however seems to be taking his time

“Listen up class, for your project work we will merge each and every one of you with a student from the 9th grade”. “They’ll help you understand this topic because their performance was outstanding especially when I though them this topic”. He continues “Listen attentively to your names so that you’ll know who you are paired with; I won’t repeat myself”

The slightly robust Mr. Wilkins begins to call the names in alphabetical order starting with surnames. In no time my name will be called then I can go home and have something to eat.

“Canton Alexis” The teacher calls out my name and I stand up to my feet as required “you’re with Hussein Jamal”.

What! What are the odds of that happening? Of all times when I am trying to avoid Jamal at all costs this comes up. I can’t face Jamal, what do I do? What do I do?

I raise my hand up after Mr. Wilkins is done with calling the list of names.

“Yes, you have a question?” he asks while looking towards my direction.

“Yes sir, I do”. I reply while standing up to my feet as I hold the desk for support “I was wondering if it is possible to change lab partners with someone else?”

“Yes, you may change Lab partners, if you feel you cannot learn with the partners assigned to you then feel free to switch”. “But remember you must have a partner, you mustn’t work alone”. He then turns to me “Does that answer your question?

“Yes sir”. I reply while sitting down again. He goes on to ask again

“What’s your name and who were you paired with?”. He goes on to ask

“Alexis sir”. “Alexis canton and I was paired with Jamal Hussein

Mr. Wilkins goes through the list once again as though verifying the information I gave him and then readjusts his goggles.

“Your projects will be presented by each student in alphabetical order”, “for each class we have we will take one project presentation until we’re done with every student”

“Is that understood?” he rhetorically asks while packing up his books to leave

“Yes sir” we chorus

“Good”, “class dismissed see you all next week” and with that he leaves the classroom.

I walk over to Mimi’s desk and ask “let’s exchange project partners”

Mimi stares at me intently and finally says “You didn’t talk to Jamal again, did you?”

“No I did not” I answer “I knew you were the one that told him where to find me”

“So why don’t you want Jamal to be your project partner?” she asks, “you know he is great with stuff like this”

“I just don’t want to be around him” I reply “I don’t want to have a reason to fail this project”

“And you feel having Jamal as your project partner will make you fail?”. “Alexis listen to me, you’re overreacting. You guys are not dating; I don’t see why such news about him should bother you”. “And I know that news was over exaggerated”

She sighs

“But I know how stubborn you can be and I know you’ve already made up your mind so I support you all the way”. “However I can’t promise you that I won’t tell him of what you just did, you know how my mouth is”

I look at Mimi and I am glad to have her around as my support system.

.“Thanks Mimi”. “I don’t owe you one”

“Badminton practice today?” Mimi says “Have you forgotten “.where are you going to?”

“Mimi I dont think my strength can carry me”. I reply “I need to go home”

“Why won’t you say that, when you’ve wasted more than half of your energy keeping malice with someone who doesn’t know you hold a grudge against him”

“Fine, fine”. “I’ll come but just the first half”

“Sure, why not”. “Let’s go before coach arrives”

“Did you bring your badminton gear?”

“I usually leave it in my Locker in school that way I don’t forget it at home”

“Nice”

The sports arena of the school comprises of indoor games such as badminton, squash, basketball and the likes of them. I enrolled for badminton not too long and the coach says I am a natural. I love the game. But today of all days I feel like I am forced to play and it is telling on my game. I have missed the shuttle cork a number of times and the other team is scoring against us.

The sound of the basketball on the court, the sound of the tennis ball on its own court and the sound of the squash ball hitting the wall is all making me dizzy. I am sweating so much and I feel like the ground is spinning beneath my feet.

The sound of the whistle blows and the second round of the game starts. The shuttlecock is coming towards my direction. I take an aim and with full force swing back against it only for my feet to give way from weakness (they can’t carry me again); My Racket falls down from my grip as the world around me is spinning even more. I can’t hear any sounds anymore but i see myself slump on the court as my eyes slowly shut. I see Mimi running towards me and Jamal?! He seems to be in a basketball jersey. I must be Hallucinating; it is so bad I can even hear his voice.

I drowsily open my eyes to the cold touch of a palm on my forehead. Mimi?!

“Your palms are cold” I manage to say under my breath but it comes out as an undertone. It seems she didn’t hear me so I repeat myself louder this time

“Your palms are cold”

“Did you say something?” comes the familiar tone. I turn only to see Jamal sitting beside me

Oh my goodness it’s Jamal, just calm down Alexis, remain calm

“Your Palms are cold” I repeat myself so loud my head hurt.

He quickly removes his hand from my forehead “Oh sorry”. “Do you need anything?” “Are you hurting anywhere?” “Should I call the Nurse?”

“The nurse?” I ask “where am I?” “Am I in a hospital?”

From the matching sheets and curtains I realize I am in the school’s sick bay.

“Relax; you’re in the sick bay” reassures Jamal.

How can I relax when you’re sitting right beside me; just then I notice Jamal’s Basketball Jersey. I didn’t realize you play basketball. The basketball court is just a few feet from the Badminton court so all this while you’ve been watching me play on the Badminton court.

“Where’s Mimi?” I ask gently

“She went to get something, she’ll be back soon” He replies “And so will your mom, the school called her”

“What Happened to me?” I ask unable to remember all that happened

“I am not really sure either, all I know is that you had slumped on the badminton court so I brought you in here with Mimi” Jamal replies

“The nurse said your blood sugar was low; that you probably hadn’t eaten and yet went ahead to play that’s what made you dizzy. You were also dehydrated”

“Why did you do that to yourself?” “Why didn’t you have something to eat during recess?”

I try not to look directly into his eyes before my emotions fail me “I didn’t eat during recess because I couldn’t eat then, I wasn’t hungry then”. “I was distracted”. “Had something on my mind”.

“What was on your mind Alexis”? Asks Jamal while adjusting the pillow underneath my head “What could be so important to deprive you of your concentration that you forgot to eat something?”

“Not ‘what’ Jamal” I reply “who?”

“Fine, who?”

“You Jamal”. I continue “You were the distraction”. “I heard about you and Trina and I snapped”. “I guess that’s foolish of me considering the fact that we agreed on just being friends”. “Sorry for not being more supportive as a friend”

Jamal is sitting there quietly paying rapt attention and he finally says

“About I and Trina, I thought you’d understand”. “I mean we need each other”. “She needs me and I need her too” “We can’t work without each other”. “We need to make it work”

The words coming out of Jamal’s mouth are like stab wounds to my heart. I wish he would stop now and say he was joking and that they are just friends or less than friends; acquaintances.

That means every other thing Marilyn told me on the bus is true. Jamal and I may just be friends but why do I feel like he has betrayed me?

“Can you leave now”? I say to Jamal,

“What?” he replies there’s this feeling of hurt in his eyes I don’t seem to understand

“I need to change, my mom is around”. I continue “I just heard her car horn”

He rises up, takes one last fleeting look at me then makes his way to the door and out of the sick bay. I can’t really describe that look. Is it, anger, disappointment, affection, or regret?

Who knows? All that matters now is that mom’s here and I am going home

“What do you think of these colours?” Asks Mom while showing me a catalogue of various colour combinations.

“I feel these ones are too playful which is childish” I reply “however these ones light up the room in a mature way”

“Well then, this one it is” she says while marking the colour combination of my choice.

“Would you like me to bake the birthday cake or we should order one? “She asks

“If it will stress you since we have other things to prepare then let’s order” I reply yet again “But if we have ample time then I guess we can handle it on our own.

Today’s Friday. One day to my birthday and preparations for it have begun head-on. It’s such a busy day for both of us. The school indulged me to rest at home after the incident on the badminton court. I really did need the rest.

Mom has already printed out invitation cards. “Tell me Alex, what you think of these cards” Mom asks handing me one of the cards

“Wow! Mom they look beautiful and classy too”. “Thanks Mom”

“You’re welcome dear” she replies

“There’s just one problem though, today’s Friday, the birthday is tomorrow, how do I get these to my friends?” I ask

Mommy laughs “Don’t you trust me”.

“This is not my first party dear”. “I already handed out the cards”. She continues

“Initially it was meant to be a surprise birthday party but you always know when there is a surprise up my sleeves so I just handed them out to your teachers who I am guessing shared them to your classmates”.

“Don’t worry; super Mom has got everything covered”.

I get scared when she says that because that’s when she tends to over-do herself. She sure loves to throw parties. A party horse herself

“Mom, please don’t get worked up over anything this year, I just want something simple”

“Fine but just so you know the birthday party has a theme; it is themed the Grammys Red carpet event”. She says “That reminds me your gown is yet to arrive”. “I wonder why it’s taking so long

“Mom?! Please calm down”, I know she has begun with this party craze again “With this theme the party is going to look like prom”

“I know right?!” replies mom after dropping a call

It’s of no use trying to convince her now, once Mom is in, she is in. I sigh in surrender to her will

“What of the food, what are we serving our guests?” I ask her

“You don’t worry about that dear”, she replies “I have already ordered for a buffet”. “I told you its red carpet event themed. You just get yourself ready mentally and of course physically. We have got to do something about your hair”

“What’s wrong with my hair?” I ask her running my hands through it.

You’ll have to style it up in a Greek goddess fashion because your dress is coming out almost in the same fashion too. She replies

“I can’t believe my baby is 14 years old already” she says teary eyed “When did you grow so fast”. “If your dad was here, he would’ve been trying to lift you up” she laughs and then cries tears of Joy

“Will you be okay on your own?’. She asks “I need to go and give special instructions pertaining your cake”

“Yes mum I’ll be just fine”. I reply. “Now go let me have some rest”

While Mom is gone I climb up the stairs into Dad’s study, I stand by the door frame and first of all peep inside; it as though he is still here.

I finally mutter the courage to step in. I quietly move from one book shelf to the other and memories of him come flashing through my mind. I gently run my fingers on the rich large mahogany study table one last time as tears well up in my eyes. I speak into the empty room

“Hi Dad, your little girl’s turning 14 tomorrow”

“As usual Mommy is over-working herself”. I laugh “she has refused to take things easy”

“I really miss you”. “More now than ever”. My eyes wander to the photo frame on the table. I remember when we took that picture.

Just then Roscoe barks bringing me back to reality. I didn’t even know he followed me into the study.

“Hey there buddy!” “What are you doing here?”. “You want to play?” As I bend to stroke Roscoe he runs away again

snitch

I leave the study and lock it up thinking of what to do on my hair. For some reason mom did not like me going to the Salon for fear of my hair. So she bought everything a salon could ever have so that in need of any intricate hairstyle we just called a stylist and paid for home service.

In my room I sit in front of the dressing mirror with my hair conditioner in my hand I begin conditioning my hair, massaging the conditioner in from root to tips. Afterwards I cover the hair with a nylon shower cap and allow the conditioner to set in.

I am tired of sitting up so I climb unto my bed. I pick up the Vogue Magazine by my bedside lamp and begin flipping through the pages. It’s not long before I doze off.

I wake up again in a meadow full of wild daisies, daffodils. They look so beautiful. The sun is shining bright above me and I see Jamal walking towards me. He takes my hand and leads the way while I just follow right beside him. We stop by a brook just close to the meadow that seemed to be watered by other little outlets.

Right there at the bank of the brook Jamal begins stripping. First he takes off his shirt and then he unbuttons his trousers and unzips the zipper before pulling them down. I avert my eyes but then he walks up to me and returns my face to his gaze. I can see all of him now, his chiseled features down to his mid-section. He slowly places his hand on my back and pulls down the zipper of my dress. He slowly pulls down my dress strap after strap and undresses me right before his eyes. He takes me then in his arms and glides gently into the water going to the less shallow parts of the clear water. I cling unto him as the cool water touches my skin. He finally sets me on my feet and there we are; the two of us in the clear water of the brook staring passionately into each other’s eyes. Forgetting all the cares of the world. He holds my hand and pulls me closer to him. I hold on to his shoulders as the waters rock back and forth all around us. He holds me so close that I am enveloped in his aura. I stare into his eyes and all I see in burning passion and with that passion he kisses my lips and I melt in his embrace. I tighten my grip on his shoulder so hard that he cringes. His hands freely rummage my bare skin. My pulse increases and I am no longer in control of my emotions; I cry out in excitement as I cling onto him. He grips me hard with one hand as though his life depends on it and with the other he slips down. He traces down, lower and lower until he stops. Just as I am trying to regain my sanity I feel him inside me. Deep, deeper and then out again in rhythmic motion until finally he stops.

He carries me out of the water unto a bed of wild daffodils and daises and sets me there as he gazes at me in my birthday suit. I coyly cover myself and he bends in for a kiss. Smooching me all over. He finally says “You have a beautiful body don’t be ashamed of it” once again he traces his hands up into my inner thigh more caressingly and I cringe even more. “I need to know you’re ready for me”. I whimper in pleasure at his every touch. He arches my legs and kneels right there with his fingers still working. I raise myself to meet him and he wraps my legs round him. And whispers something to my ear “Do you trust me?” I nod at him with fear in my eyes and he kisses me to relax as he takes the first thrust. Slowly, gently rocking us back and forth; then the second and third in rapid succession. He goes on over and over, time after time until I can feel his body tense and I feel a warm liquid spewing inside of me. He retracts his shaft and then takes his place beside me whilst holding me in his arms. I can’t look into his eyes so I recoil coyly into his heaving chest.

He manages to say. “You know I love you, I can never hurt you”. “I may be able to hurt myself but I can’t bear to see you get hurt”. “I love you” With that he plants a kiss on my forehead and as I look into his eyes I see a more mature Jamal, not the 9th grader, much more matured. I shut my eyes and Jamal licks my face. I smile in pleasure and he repeats it again and again and again and again.

I open my eyes only to see Roscoe’s hairy face in my face.

“Roscoe?” “Get down”. “What time is it?” I ask rhetorically as though my Canine buddy can speak and the dog looks at me confused. Mom calls for him and he runs out of my room then she calls from downstairs.

“Happy birthday Alex”. “I guess that what Roscoe wanted to wish you”

“Thanks Mom” Mehn did I sleep for long I rise up from my bed and notice I didn’t have my bath last night so I rush into the bathroom to tidy up. As I turn open the faucet, I have flashes of the dream. I smile and quickly shake them off. I wonder why the Jamal in my dreams seems totally different than the Jamal in reality. The Jamal in my dreams is full of wild passion and can’t get enough of me when we’re together as opposed to the real Jamal who isn’t interested in me that way; he just wants me as a friend. Why can’t Jamal be like Jamal?. I remember his words to me in the sick bay about him and Trina. They need each other; one cannot work without the other. This saddens me and I take off the shower cap and wash my hair clean with strawberry scented shampoo and recondition it then rinse it out.

Having finished from the shower I sit on my bed and think about the dream I had. And how lately I have been having such weird dreams about Jamal. I hardly have scary dreams again, it’s as though they have transitioned to such kind of dreams. That’s even scarier.

Jamal and I aren’t even in good terms and I am having such dreams about him. Is it normal? Do I need to seek help?

Help or no help, today’s my birthday and I don’t intend to spoil my perfect birthday.

The preparations are already in gear and decorations have started. Of course that’s Mom’s specialty. Like she said she is decorating with the theme Red carpet event. The caterers have set the buffet tables and are yet to be done in the kitchen, it’s a whole lot of work altogether.

By the time all preparations have been concluded it’s about 4:30pm and guests have started arriving already.

The hair stylist is trying her best to get mummy’s Greek goddess style to match my gown. And the gown, a mixture of silk and chiffon with intricately worked stitches almost like embroidery laced in the front torso is truly beautiful. I guess Momma actually knows best.

Mommy walks into the room where the hair stylist is putting finishing touches to the hair. She gasps in excitement and covers her mouth as though she wants to cry.

“Oh you look so beautiful”, she says “I feel I shouldn’t have even gotten you this” she hands me a box that has a semblance to a mini-chest “Happy birthday dear”

“Mom? Thank you”. I reply “What’s in it?”

“Open it, it’s yours now” I open the box and it’s a professional make up box.

“Wow!” I stare in amazement “this is beautiful mom”

“You’re welcome sweetie; I guess you’re old enough to start wearing a little makeup”. She replies “The stylist will also do your make up”. “Hurry and round up, the house is becoming full and impatient too”. “Teenagers”

I wonder if Jamal did make it, or maybe he didn’t.

After making me up the stylist helps me into my dress and when I look in the mirror I can’t believe it’s me. It’s like I am Beyoncé on the red carpet.

“Okay Alex we are all done its time to step out” says the stylist “Need help walking with the shoes?”

“No I am okay, I can manage” I reply “I think I’ll slow my pace so I don’t trip or miss a step”

“Nice!” She says “That’s the spirit girl”. “Happy birthday Alex” And with that she holds open the door for me to walk through.

I step out of my room to the stair case and immediately a spot light is shone in my direction almost blinding me. And then a female voice which is definitely Mom’s calls out

“Give it up for the Birthday Girl” there is a great applause and I smile while waving. In a minute the moment is over and I finally reach the bottom f the stairs. So many people. So many stares and I think I hear someone whisper, she looks different.

I walk around from one familiar face to the other to say express my pleasure for their coming. I use the opportunity to look around for Mimi. Just as I am talking to some classmates. I hear Mom’s voice again over the speakers announcing Oh mom! I said keep it simple I turn towards the direction of the sound

“Hi everyone, please listen up”. “I’d like to propose a toast to the birthday girl, my very own baby girl Alexis Mariah Canton”.

She holds her glass and begins her speech. “My baby girl, it was great joy when you came to us fourteen years back on this special day” she continues “your Father and I were so happy we always wanted a baby girl and there you were”. “Overtime we watched you grow into a beautiful young lady”. “I wish your dad was here to witness this day, but I know he’s watching from the heavens”. “I wish you all the very best in this unpredictable world of ours”. “Happy birthday dear”. “To the birthday girl, Alexis”. “Cheers!”

What a wonderful toast mom gave. I glance at her teary eyed and spell out the words I love you with my lips.

“To Alexis” everyone choruses and then clinks their glasses.

“Hey you”. “Happy birthday” I turn around to see who just spoke to me

“Mimi!” “Thanks you!” I then playfully slap her on the shoulder “Where have you been, I have been looking everywhere”

“You sure you were looking for me? Because I’ve been around”. She replies “You know mingling”. “Nice party, your Mom really overdid herself, thumbs up to her”

“I know right?” I say turning to where mom is sitting with her own group of friends “I love her so much”

I turn back to Mimi and she is nowhere to be seen. She has disappeared in the crowd again. Probably going to mingle some more. Typical Mimi.

For some reason I miss Jamal. I can’t believe he didn’t come. It’s not fair. It’s my birthday; he should be here, so much for having a friend. I stroll around one last time before heading to the balcony. The cool evening breeze is so comforting I close my eyes and inhale the fresh air.

“Happy birthday, Alexis”

“Thank you and thanks for coming” I reply, that’s a phrase I was using more than any other tonight. I turn towards the voice and see some average height guy neatly shaven in a well-tailored suit. He looks like a face I’ve seen in class. Oh my goodness! Laurent?

“Oh hi Laurent”. I say finally recalling his name “I dint think you’d come”.

“Hope you’re enjoying the party” I ask trying to hold a conversation

“Are you kidding, this is one of the coolest parties I’ve been to” he replies in excitement “And your mom, she’s cool”

I laugh “I am glad you’re having a great time”

“You’re beautiful” He says “I have a question to ask you though”

“You’re not looking bad yourself”. I respond quickly as though it’s a reflex “sure, what do you want to ask?”

“Are you seeing anyone?” He continues “Are you dating anyone?”

Immediately Jamal’s name pops into my mind and I quickly brush it aside in resentment. If he cared about me, he would’ve at least shown up for my birthday like he said he would

“Are you?” he asks for a third time springing me back to reality

“No I am not”. “Why do you ask?”

“I was hoping you’ll be my girlfriend supposing you say yes?” he says. “I really like you”

“uhm…” I manage to mutter feeling really uncomfortable and it’s not the dress

He straightens “I am not expecting an answer from you right now”, “however am hoping you put it into consideration” “just think about it okay?”

“Actually Laurent, I…” In that split second someone grabs my wrist and pulls me aside.

“Hey!” I shout “Let me go”

“I’ll never”

“What?!” I ask in surprise and as I turn around I see Jamal holding my hand, I swivel my hand free of his grip. At this point Laurent has come to intervene

“Hey bro, not cool” says Laurent staring at Jamal as though ready to brawl.

“Hey bro, back off” Jamal replies furiously

“I was talking to her first”, “you can’t just come drag her away like that, and she could’ve gotten hurt” Laurent says making a fist.

Their voices seem to be catching the attention of a few persons already. I have to do something now or the party would end up being a disaster And mom really worked hard for this, no way am I going to allow that

“Laurent”, “I am sorry, let me find out what this is about” I take Jamal’s wrist and we move aside

“Jamal”. “What is all this?” I ask looking him in the face “Why did you drag me that way, Laurent is right I would’ve gotten hurt?”

“I’ll never allow that happen” he mutters under his breath “I am sorry for my actions”. He says “we need to talk”

I glare at him

“You would’ve said so instead of trying to use violence”. I reply “What do you want to talk about?”

“Just stuff” he says

“Okay, go on am listening” I reply

“We can’t talk here, there’s music, and you may not hear what I am saying” he says

“Do you know what, just forget, I don’t feel like talking to you again”. “So we don’t have to go anywhere quieter” I turn to leave and he grabs my wrist yet again.

“Please”. He pleads “Can you please just hear me out?”

“Fine, let’s go to my bedroom”. I reply “It’s the first door at the top of the stair case”. “You go in first and I’ll enter a few minutes later”. “That way people don’t get suspicious and assume you were looking for the bathroom”

“Nice plan” he says smiling at me

After 5minutes I enter my bedroom and Jamal is sitting on my Bed.

“I brought cake; we cut the cake while you weren’t there”. “That’s why I took longer” I hand him the saucer containing the piece of cake

“So, here we are”; “it’s quiet in here, what did you want to discuss?”

He collects the saucer and places it by the dresser.

“In case I haven’t said so” he says “you look beautiful in that dress, that hair and makeup, they all accentuate your beauty”

“Thank you” I reply while taking a good look at him. That’s when I notice he is dressed in a pair of skinny jeans, loafers and a matching blazer “you don’t look bad yourself” I drag the chair by the dressing mirror and sit facing him “so what is it”

“I intend asking you that” he replies “You have been behaving differently lately”. “From that day on the bus up until today?” “Is everything okay?” “Have I done anything wrong?”

Of course you have. You have done everything wrong. “Nothing is wrong?” I lie “You haven’t done anything wrong”

“Alexis, I hope you understand that I am not letting you go until you tell me what’s on your mind”. He says “I mean it is obvious you have something against me”

“Fine, you want to know why i am so mad at you?”. “You are dating Trina”. “You know how I feel about you”, “You do, yet you said we should just stick to being friends and then you go ahead to start dating Trina?”

“Why would you do that?” I ask in anger “Is it because you feel I’m Naïve and too young?” “Well news flash, I just turned 14 and I can actually date whoever I want now”. I continue

“You love smart girls right?” that’s why you went for Trina?”. “And you guys hang out together all the time”. “I even hear you guys are going to the Mathathon together”. “You guys are just perfect for each other”.

“And even back in the sickbay you said you both need each other, you can’t live without the other; rubbing it all in my face”. “What kind of friend behaves like that?”

I didn’t realize tears would flow down my eyes in the process of saying all these things; I quickly brush them away before they soil my makeup.

I finally catch my breath and relax while joining Jamal on the bed “Why her?” I manage to say calmly “why not me”. “Jamal why can’t you see me differently”. “Why did you choose to friend zone me when you know how I feel about you?”

“You must think I am just a dumb 14 year old who doesn’t understand anything about these things”. I clench my handkerchief in my hand harder “But I know what I feel when I see you or even when am around you”

“Love is a strong word but I know that’s what I feel for you”. “So even if you don’t choose to recognize me, it doesn’t change what I feel”. He is looking away from me at this point yet I keep speaking. “It only hurts me that the first time I’ve loved it is unrequited”. “I really wish I had the power to redirect this love to someone else but it’s not that easy”.

And just then, In a split second as though acting under reflexes he closes in and kisses my lips so passionately and I swallow my words. His lips play rhythms with mine and then he stops. I can hear him breathing hard as he mutters under his breath. “I ‘m sorry”. I move even closer to him and kiss him over and over again which he resists until finally he lets in.

His breathing has become harder and my pulse has increased; he caresses me ever so intensely as I place my hands on his shoulder and pull him ever so gently to me.

“Alexis, we shouldn’t” he says breaking the caress and gently removing my hands from his shoulders. “This isn’t right”

I look away bashfully and he takes my hand

“I guess this tells you how I feel about you too” he says “You saw everything the wrong way Alexis”. “Trina and I are not dating; we are representing the school in the next Mathathon that’s why you keep seeing us together. The head teacher insists that we need to study together so that we both learn team work”

“And the other girls?” I ask him

“What other girls?” he asks “Most of these girls just assume you’re interested in them when you smile at them or say something nice or compliment them”. He continues “And they tell their friends that tell their other friends, that tell other friends and that is how gossips are generated and spread” he takes my hands in his and says further

“Look Alexis, I am a one girl type of guy and this guy is attracted to only you”

“So why did you insist we should just be friends?”

“I guess because I was scared of hurting you” he laughs “But it turns out my not wanting to hurt you turned out to hurt you even more”. “I ‘m sorry”

“I’m sorry too for completely misunderstanding everything” I say while wrapping my hands around him “I love you Jamal”

He returns the hug but doesn’t say anything anymore.

He finally speaks

“Happy birthday Alexis!”