Divided heart

14. ceiling

Time doesn't heal your wounds, but it teaches you to live with them. So it is with sin. You cannot hide it or heal it.

-Sin-

I remember what it felt like to wake up then, accompanied by the morning sunlight. My head throbbed, my lips were dry and cracked, and a great confusion reigned.

The glass door was wide open, the scorching heat hitting my face, making my eyes blink constantly. My body felt stiff; the hard floor had become a bed now. It wasn't cold; something warm was wrapped around me. Soft and beating regularly.

I shifted my gaze downward, long black hair flowing around my bare chest. Gentle hands held me tightly to their back. The warmth of a body in thin, worn clothes clung to me, almost pinning me.

I was startled, my body recoiled. The girl woke up as her head, which had been resting on my chest, hit the floor. Helpless, I quickly grabbed the blanket on the bed, trying to cover my underwear.

What happened? My head throbbed, the memory I was waiting for never came.

"Hei… why?" Candy ruffled her hair, yawning occasionally, covering her mouth with her hand.

"This…!" I pointed to my body.

"Why are we sleeping together? What happened?"

Don't tell me last night we…...

Candy stood up, straightening her rumpled dress, making me turn away in embarrassment; it was clear this girl wasn't wearing underwear.

"Your clothes were wet last night, I washed them. Because your body was dirty, I didn't bring you to the bed," she said clearly, pointing to the clothes spread out on the round balcony.

I took a deep breath; a faint smell of salty metal still lingered. Candy pulled up a chair, lifted her legs, and climbed onto the dining table.

"What are you doing?" I asked, confused. How could she be so impolite as to climb onto the dining table?

The girl turned, "Don't peek, okay…!" she said shyly.

"Huh…?"

Without further explanation, Candy pressed a small part of the ceiling panel. A small opening appeared, and the woman immediately slid the ceiling panel upwards. She then climbed up.

"What are you waiting for? Put on your clothes and come up."

"What…?"

"I've prepared them up there, we just need to tidy up after you woke up."

"What do you mean?"

"Come on up…!" she urged. Her voice softened.

Although confused, I still followed Candy's wishes. Grabbing my shirt and shorts, I followed the woman's path to the ceiling. It wasn't easy to climb, considering my weight was much heavier than Candy's.

After struggling, my hands managed to lift my body to the ceiling. The place was narrow; I had to bend over to walk. It was more like a corridor or a chimney.

"Come here…" Candy called from ahead.

I stepped forward, supporting myself on the rough wall to maintain balance. I could estimate the distance; it was about two flats until we reached a wider surface. This place was a little more spacious, allowing two bodies to pass at the same time.

Candy sat cross-legged, cutting something while facing away from me. A large plastic bag lay beside her.

"What are you doing?" My heart pounded. The smell of blood was stronger in this area.

"Cleaning up the mess you made." The woman turned, smiling innocently. If I hadn't noticed what she was holding at that moment, I might have been contaminated by her sweet smile.

My head throbbed, whispering loud voices in my mind. The flesh swung with Candy's hand movements. She was cutting Robert's body into small pieces.

My breath hitched; the voices grew louder and louder, begging to be released.

"Hello… Loki." I was startled by my own words.

"Heil, you're back…?" Candy turned quickly, almost throwing the knife in her hand from excitement.

"What? He… heil?"

"Heil….!! Ah… you're not Heil…, you're Loki?" The girl returned to her gruesome task.

"What do you mean, Heil? Who's talking in my head? Is it Heil?" I asked, one question after another.

Candy hummed softly, ignoring all my questions.

"Candy, am I a murderer?" My voice choked as the words escaped. This question was more of a statement to me.

The knife clattered to the floor as Candy suddenly put it down.

"No, Heil did it. He helped me, He avenged my anger, and He promised…" The woman lowered her head, playing with a lump of flesh between her fingers.

The gruesome sight made me want to vomit. I saw clearly how human flesh, the flesh of our own species, was being squeezed like a toy by this girl.

"What did he promise?" Slowly, my feet moved backward.

Candy looked directly into my eyes. "Hei… say you have to remember it yourself. The more you remember it, Heil will meet me more often."

Honestly, that sentence was more terrifying than the mutilated corpse in front of me. Someone was living inside me, trying to take control. And that person wasn't ordinary. He was a… murderer, he was another me. This reality gripped my heart fiercely.

The more afraid I became, the more I felt that presence. In my mind, he tried to drag my sanity to the darkest corner. His desire was so strong that I shivered in pain. He wanted to be free, and I was his shackles.

"Stop…!!!" I banged my head hard.

"Please stop talking."

Candy leaned in, walking towards me.

"Don't come closer,"

My mutterings grew increasingly terrifying. They were conspiring; both of them wanted to get rid of me. This is my body; no one has the right to take over.

"Hei… look at this." Candy grabbed my arm, quickly pressing my five left fingers against the cement wall. Strange, wavy indentations felt beneath her hand.

I gasped, seeing the piled bones in the cement wall. Like a masterpiece sculpture.

"You forgot, hey…?" Candy swept my hand across the bones, reaching the skull with its sunken eye sockets staring sharply at me.

My body froze, unable to move despite my strongest efforts. Sweat poured down, thundering in my burning chest.

"This is your brother, you remember now, Heil?" Candy released my hand, hugging me from behind. "We cleaned up his body, minced him finely until he became ground meat. We arranged his bones here, then…" Candy blew a hot gust of air while sighing contentedly. I swallowed nervously, almost choking on the pressure of fear.

"We made nuggets and distributed them to all the apartment residents. They thought it was chicken nuggets. Funny, right?" The girl chuckled.

"You… you… murderer." My tongue felt numb; I struggled to utter the words haltingly.

"No, not me! You, Heil… you killed him!!! Do I need to remind you how you killed your brother?" she whispered softly in my ear.

"Wh…what?"

"Aldo, his name was Aldo."

Suddenly, the memory flooded my mind, shaking my soul with unimaginable fear.

Aldo… Aldo… Aldo…

The name echoed loudly.

You hated him, you hated your brother.

Aldo, you killed Aldo that day. Here.

In flat number 20.

My legs gave way, falling with my head hitting the bones on the wall. Candy screamed in surprise, trying to hold me up, but my weight made us fall together.

This is my time. That voice gripped me, pulling me into the embrace of darkness.