Chasing you : Noblesse Series

"Grandma what do you think is the best title For the love story of you and Grandpa" Leon and I looked at each other We smile and said "Forever and Ever - "story Time" Our 3 Grandchildren said. I look at the pen and notebook in front of Kate "Okay We're ready" - A YEAR PAST - "I know lilian. Nothing hurts more than realizing he meant everything to you, but you meant nothing to him.. you gave him everything you gave up your dream. you gave up your dignity. sweetheart Real love isn't just a euphoric, spontaneous feeling- it's a deliberate choice a plan to love each other for better and worse, for richer and poorer, in sickness and in health. Sweetheart. Loving someone who doesn't love you in return... is like trying to fly with a broken wing. Gave up lilian. he meant nothing to you. you loved him but him no. Lilian it's time to wake up. you can't do anything" i look at My Daughter eyes My baby it's time for you to say goodbye. "Mom. i believe him. i believe him to love me in return for 3 year's but nothing nothing happen your right Mom. you were Right it's time to follow my heart Now that i'm broken, I see how fragile life is, how our heart can be broken in pieces. Maybe I was destined to forever fall in love with people I couldn't have. Maybe there's a whole assortment of impossible people waiting for me to find them. Waiting to make me feel the same impossibility over and over again. it just It's so hard to forget someone who gave you so much to remember Yeah. right right my daughter it's Hard to forgot someone who gave you so much to remember. but. If you want something to last forever, you treat it differently. You shield it and protect it. You never abuse it. You don't expose it to the elements. You don't make it common or ordinary. If it ever becomes tarnished, you lovingly polish it until it gleams like new. It becomes special because you have made it so, and it grows more beautiful and precious as time goes by. I brush my daughter hair and wipe her tears. My baby we can't love someone we can't have is his time; his attention, his love, his protection, his trust, and his support. I think when a woman knows that she truly has a man in her corner in a positive capacity, it is much easier for her to bring her guard down to love again. Most woman don't have the best track record when it comes to trust men. Most women have been through their own share of abuse whether it be on a physical, emotional, or verbal level. To be honest, sometimes a good man will scare a good woman because he'll come off as too good to be true. She'll look for his flaws first, before she can truly appreciate what makes him flawless in her eyes. When a woman meets a man who is ready to give her the love that she deserves, it will scare her at first; and then it will leave her feeling completely at peace. Lilian when your father leave me. it's so painful and heart broken im scared to be left alone again. i begged him to not to leave me. i kneel in front of her house i lose my dignity and people see me as a desperate woman but i don't care as long as he came back to me I kneel and Wait for him to look at me not long after that i discover that im pregnant with you and that time my smile and my heart become soft when i look at you in my belly i realized that my man that i love for a year's will never came back to me and didn't love me once and that time my heart shattered and i looked at you and say that ' i will protect you and love you for the rest of my life. i don't want you to have same fate with me. i want you to have a bright future. i love you my baby ' and my heart became peace I stopped being desperate and realized my mistake when i gave birth to you it's feel like my world became peace and i hold your hand and say that ' you are my new world and my hero. who save me from my dark past. i love you my daughter" I hugged my daughter that time my world became peace I remember my parents who left me i thought that they didn't love me and tired of me That time when im in labor i remember my parents who didn't love and when i gave birth to you and heard your cry for the first time my mind become blank and suddenly appear my parents who leave me in my grandmas house they are crying but i didn't see it I become blind my grandma said that They loved me and cared for me but i didn't listen to her Then i heard my grandma's saying that my Parents Is dead they commit suicide. lilian. i don't want you to feel lonely i don't want you to feel the same fate. There's going to be very painful moments in your life that will change your entire world in a matter of minutes. These moments will change YOU. Let them make you stronger, smarter, and kinder. But don't you go and become someone that your not. Cry. Scream if you have to. Then you straighten out that crown and keep it moving. Sometimes all that we need is.. time to take care of ourselves, love ourselves and nurture our souls. Sometimes all that we need is a little bit of time, time to reconnect with ourselves, time to get back that inner peace we lost somewhere along the way and time to get clarity we need. Take it step by step, one day at a time, and instead of judging yourself, forgive yourself, let go and give yourself love you deserve. When you love yourself, you glow from the inside. You attract people who love, respect, and appreciate your energy. Everything starts with and how you feel about yourself. Start feeling worthy, valuable and deserving of receiving the best life has to offer. you have to do things for yourself before you do things for other people. love yourself then love other people. trust yourself then trust other people. be kind to yourself. be good to yourself. when it is time for other people, it will be time for other people but right now you have to save yourself before you can save other people. You deserve someone who will be honest with you. You deserve someone who will respect you. Someone who will treasure your heart. Someone who would never abuse your trust and who will cherish you. You deserve someone who will stand there, hold you in their arms after a fight, and will never leave you, no matter how hard things can get. You deserve someone who's REAL and loyal. Never settle for less. There's going to be very painful moments in your life that will change your entire world in a matter of minutes. But don't you go and become someone that your not. Cry. Scream if you have to. Then you straighten out that crown and keep it moving. When you love yourself, you glow from the inside. You attract people who love, respect, and appreciate your energy. Everything starts with and how you feel about yourself. Start feeling worthy, valuable and deserving of receiving the best life has to offer. Be magnetic. You know I gave you the name of 'Lilian' because when i Gave birth to you it's feel like the god gave me another chance A chance to change A chance to love my self And forgive it My Lilian is Pure and an angel that God sent to me I love you my daughter my angel I Smile and look at my daughter she's sleeping i look how red his face from crying When she was a baby a child and teen and even now wherever she's crying his nose eyes and cheeks and are red I remember when she came home from school his nose is red as red as the nose of the reider Rodolf I ask her why she cry He deny it and said that she didn't cry but it's obvious i called her school and ask why my daughter is crying when she came home from the school the School said that the parents of her classmate said that Her daddy didn't love both of her they leave them and cheat on them and how desperate her mother and shameless when lilian heard that lilian step in and shout at them and said that I don't need a daddy I just need my mommy and whoever said that my mother is desperate and shameless wil be kick out of this school I was shock that time and laughed my daughter is not like that Everyone including the principal and the teachers of the school Shocked i was one of the school holder so everyone was afraid When Lilian said that My world is protecting me i smile My thoughts shattered when my phone vibrate Someone is calling I Answer it "Hello noblesse residence who is this?" "Lily is that you?" A familiar voice stopped me i check how my daughter sleeping i adjust her blanket and see if she's comfortable i step out of the room and went to living room "What do you want. Leon" I said coldly "Lily. I'm outside please let's talk" i look at the wall clock it's 8:52 pm It's cold outside I looked out the window His standing in front of our gate it's leon Lilian's father I walked outside i look how stressed his eyes is when he saw me I saw how his eyes lit up "Leon .. what do you want" I said to her when I confronted her "Lily .." I ask again "What do you want" I look how he changed. his beard is growing he look tired at all If in the past if i saw him like this I will feeling guilty and blame my self for being useless wife but everyone can change I look at him coldy. and said again "What do you want" - How you change my Wife In the past if you saw me tired and listless You hurriedly came to me and gave me a something to drink I saw how you worried about me and care for me and i saw in your eyes how you blame your self and thinking that your useless wife In fact I'm the one that useless and your the perfect How i waste you How i waste the happiest part of my life How i waste your love Lily i was so regretful I left you and didn't look back When that time i saw you standing in front of my house and walk away i want to shout at you and say "Wait for me" but no i didn't do it I left you all alone I didn't stop loving you I just decide to stop showing it I've let you feel lonely again. i thought that that choice is the best for the both of us. i suffer from depression i thought that from the two of us I'm the most suffering from the pain But i was wrong I need to wait For 10years and after that i give you explanation why i left you all alone but after 10 years you changed -