Danny

Chapter 10

Time passes and I warm up more to Chelsea. She still warns not to get too attached to Dr Booysens, but I generally shrug off most of her comments. Dr Booysens sees me twice a week for two to three weeks. He is by far my favourite doctor amongst the team.

One particular morning I wake up in my bed with nurses coming in and out of my room giving me food and a basin to wash. Just before lunch he is by my bed with the nurse next him. I always forget her name but she doesn't seem to like me much anyway.

He looks down at my leg with a smile and tells me it looks like my leg is healing well. He thinks it is time for me to go back to theater to remove the big device on my leg. He tells the nurse next him to make sure they put a special dressing on the open sections in my leg. He is pleased with the dressings so far. No puss and good wound healing. The nurses are doing a good job. He says that he is happy with the pain control, but he needs to change things if I am going to scheduled for an operation I cannot be taking anything oral.

“I know they took you off the injections a while ago and left you in tramadol and paracetamol, but things have to change. I am stopping the tramadol and paracetamol. You will get Pethidine when you feel the pain until your operation is done."

“Thank you doctor. Will I start walking soon?" I ask quietly. I am enjoying all the attention I am getting, but I am also getting restless being in one place all the time. I am eager to learn more about myself and the people around me.

He nods his head, “I would says three days post op should do the trick. Even your eye is looking much better. Your chest has healed nicely. The last thing is that leg of yours."

He leaves my room with the nurse at his heals. I am feeling up beat and excited. Fear and anxiety also borders my emotion. For now I am looking forward to telling Chelsea the good news. Afterward we can discuss where I will be going.

They serve lunch, but I am barely able to eat because my emotions are all in a turmoil.

Visiting hours and she walks in. She does not look as happy as I feel. Of course she is unaware of the news I am about to tell her. It seems she has news for me too and I am not sure it is news I want to hear.

“You look beside yourself today. Did the doctor give you some good news? " she asks noticing my agitation. I am not sure how she knew, but it must have clear as day for her. She knows me so well and it brings tears to my eyes.

“Yes, tomorrow I am getting this thing taken off," I tell her in delight.

“That is good news, " she says still not smiling. “I hate to be the one to tell you this, but Randal told me he found out something that is a bit off with your care. "

“What do you mean?" I ask. “Who is Randal?"

“Randal is my brother. He works as a lawyer in an insurance company. He said he doesn't know much about medical procedures but a friend of his gave some advice."

“Why should I be concerned with whatever his friend said? I am alive, doesn't that matter? "

“Danny, of course it matters. Maybe if things had been done differently you would be different, " she says quietly under her breath. She is trying to emphasize the fact that I don't know her the way I used to without hurting my feelings.

Problem with trying to do something is that it does not always succeed. She is kind and gentle, but even I felt the sting of those words. Anger starts rising to the surface. My mouth speaks before I can stop to think.

“Do you have a problem with the way I am now? Am I not good enough for you any more? "

“Don't be like that," she sobs. Her hands reach up to her face to hide her hideous face as she cries violently. I watch with guilt as her shoulders quake with every sob. My temper is still getting the better of me. I realise what a mistake I made as I watch her cry into her hands.

I sense I should comfort her so I reach over to put my hand gently on her shoulder. She flinches at my touch. Her wet face moves up from her open palms. She looks at me with confusion. She appears so vulnerable in that moment and then in a blink it disappears. Her anger erupts in a fantastic fashion I am left speechless.

“We are not your puppets to play with. I am done, Danny. I am done being trod and used up. You think because you have such a wealthy family that you may do as you please. I am not here to encourage the same behavior that drove to run away from your father. I am here because I love you and if you can't love me back then I shouldn't be here."

Those are her final words as she gets her bags and things together, gets up from the chair she was sitting on and promptly walks out the room. Naturally I have no idea what half of what she said means. She mentioned my family and my father. I had been sitting in this bed for days thinking who I could be as a person, but not thinking where I might have come from.

Tears start forming in the corners of my eyes. A ball curls up in my throat. Emotion takes over and my misery comes out in angry frustrated sobs. I lay there crying into my hands as I had seen Chelsea do. The nurses came in and quickly left when their job was done. They don't want to deal with awkward comforting that is required when someone lays their emotions on the table out in the open for all to see.

The night shift comes and so does Sr Brown and nurse Gumede. Sr Brown comes in to explain the operating procedure to me one last time. She sees my tear stained face and asks me what is the matter. I tell her about my fight with Chelsea and I made her so made. Sr Brown places her hand on my shoulder and tells me that Chelsea is in an awkward position. We need to be patient. Time will help us get through this. She steps back tells me good luck for the procedure and gives a small smile and a wink she leaves.

Nurse Gumede comes in to offer something for the pain. I gratefully accept. While preparing my medicine she tells me a story about her son. He was bold ambitious and full of wonderful ideas. He also had flaws. He was confident and self assured. It made him hit headed and difficult to be around as a person.

“Siyanda is a talented young man, " she begins. “Hedid well in school and walked out of varsity with ideas to make money. Some of them were a little out of this world, some were full of so much promise.

He latched himself onto one of those ideas and started putting things together. The one thing he needed was someone to invest in the idea. Some people were reluctant and others just not interested at all.

One day he was on the phone with a potential investor. The investor was dragging his feet with making a decision. Instead of waiting he forced the man's hand and it back fired. The investor decided against it and spread the word to make sure that no one invested in him. He let the investor get to him and now he is living with me and unemployed.

Anyway the moral of the story is that time makes a difference. If my son had been patient and had not believed so much that he could make him decide to invest he could have been running his own business and sleeping on my couch.

Give your friend and yourself some time. I know it feels like things have to happen now, but Rome was not built in a day and neither are relationships. She feels like she knows you because when she sees your face she sees the person she used to know. Give her time to get used to the new you so she won't see the old you."

I look up at this wise wonderful woman with hope in my eyes. I grasp the wisdom she hands me with both hands. The yearning I have to fix things between Chelsea and I is still there but now it feels like something that can be done.

She smiles at me and pats my hand gently before leaving. I rub the injection site that I had barely felt earlier as I was focusing more on her story and less on the injection she was giving me.

Nurse Gumede briefly re-enters my room with apologies. She tells me she forgot to take my water bottle away. She quickly walks towards my side trolley and lifts the half full bottle in her two hands. She quickly walks out my room with the bottle in her hands.

I lay almost motionless thinking about nurse Gumede's son. I wonder what he may look like and what kind of idea did he have that could have helped him. Of course I also think about Chelsea. She has a good heart with good intentions. My eyes slowly close as an idea of my own floats into view. My mind drifts off into slumber with one thought in mind. If I can find out where I came from and if they are as rich as Chelsea suggested then maybe I may have found Nurse Gumede's son an investor after all. To me that is the best way to say thank you for her care.