The Only Way

When we reached back

Those words raced in my mind. What? I had known that mom had been murdered. I had seen her body with my own eyes. Her throat was slit, her beautiful dress covered in blood.

 I had screamed and dad had come running up to me. Her beautiful red hair were hardly discernible from the blood. I remembered my dad had bent next to her to pick something up. I didn't care at the moment.

Dan and Jen had been very nice. So had Mrs. Kowalski. But I ignored them. I researched on what the Aurae were, what the doorway was. I found no appeasing answers. I ignored my health. Soon the holidays were over. I had not nearly finished my reading list, but never mind.

My mind was buzzing. I couldn't let all this get in the way of my education though. As I walked back through the gates of the academy, Bea came humming, next to me.

"What's up? You look like you've seen a ghost. And like you starved to death." She said.

Don't stutter.

"Well, I lost my father. So I've been.. sad." I tried to hold my tone up to the lightest possible tone.

"You lost your stammering!"

"Yeah, I did."

I had tried my best to not be nervous. Don't stutter, my father had said. So I wouldn't. As I was walking, I saw Sam.

Hate filled my heart like a cold cloth, draping over my happiness. I tried to ignore him.

"Well, well, well. Look who we have here. The freak."

I was aware of everyone looking at me intently, judging me on whatever my next step would be. I was scared. Crowds still scared me. I doubted that would ever be any different. I spoke in my distinctive English accent to overpower his snaky Italian one. "Y-you," no stuttering, I reminded myself. 

"You are absolutely no one, no one in comparison to me. You in all your chattering and mindless talks," I walked closer to him. "You, in all your glory, are nothing compared to me, even when I'm at my worst. Move out of my way. Or would you like me to tell everyone how pathetically you fell when I kicked you?" 

My words had now become a hiss. It felt good to get these feelings out.

I walked back to Bea. "Wow." Was all she said.

I couldn't believe it. My palms were shaking and my head was throbbing, but I had done it. Don't stutter. Perhaps it wasn't just a matter of speech. Perhaps my dad wished me to be confident. If that was the case, that was what I was going to do.

 I wouldn't be scared anymore. Jay walked over to me. My heart raced. Was he going to test me too? I don't think I'd be able to handle so much craziness. I was debating on whether I should I run or punch him. Alas! I was out of time. He reached me. Bea came in front of me protectively.

"No." She said. "You take another step toward her, and I mess up your face. Are we clear?"

He looked at her, clearly surprised. "What's with the bodyguard, blue?" He said jokingly. He looked at my hands crossed sternly across my chest. He then said in a more serious tone, "Please. I want to talk to her."

Bea was uncertain. But she was wavering. He did sound sincere. "Alright. Say what you want to."

He blinked blankly, realizing she meant that he could talk to me only in front of her.

"Well? Go on!" She said impatiently.

"I was thinking, that we could go alone, without her scary bodyguard." He said, raising an eyebrow.

"Well, you thought incorrectly. I-"

"Shouldn't I have a say in this?" I chimed in.

"I can handle him." I continued. He flashed Bea a smug grin which made me regret my decision.

"Whatever. I'll just be over there, talking to that guy." She pointed to Toby. She had brought him up in a few conversations where I couldn't tune her out.

"OK. So?" I prompted Jay when he stayed quiet.

"Oh! I, uh, I heard about your dad. I'm sorry. It couldn't be easy after, you know, your mom."

"Is that all? OK, thanks, I guess."

I was walking away when he said, "Oh, and, I'm sorry. About being so horrible to you."

"Why would you apologize?"

"I have a sister. I'd hate if anyone did that to her."

"Oh." And as I left him behind, I walked toward Bea. I didn't like that boy. Something about him, the way he nervously fiddled with his fingers, the way he'd look at me, it unsettled me. He was much like how I would imagine a monster. 

Scary, but not in and obvious way. As I got to Bea, their conversation was going quite pathetically. "Yes, I love crisps. They're quite amazing." She said. The boy, looking equally interested but was unfortunately even more awkward. "Yes, my family is involved with a popular crisp making company."

"What do they do?"

"They help by giving money."

"Lovely. They're donors?"

"Not exactly. They give money in exchange for food."

I felt like laughing and wincing at the same time. Jen could've helped thought these people so much, being the heartbreaker she was. Dan was just as incredible with people.

Ah. My dear friends. And then I noticed that Bea had gotten her finger tangled in her hair in an attempt to twirl her hair. I couldn't help it. I laughed loudly.

Bea glared at me. Toby then tried to help her and ended up tangling his own finger in the hair. Her long black hair were so beautiful. I thought they could never ever be ugly in the slightest. I had been surprised. Her hair, usually so beautifully let down, were now an ugly, tangled mess. It was ridiculous. Never in my life had I felt like laughing this hard.

"Go-" I coughed. "Go to the nurse before-" I laughed again. "Before it gets worse. Stop-" Bea was really glaring now. "Stop moving." I was able to choke out. I turned around, wheezing, and I saw a lady.

"Good morning. My name is Alana Brown. I'm your head. All of you will meet me in the auditorium in 10 minutes. No one will be late. Are we clear?"

A chorus of 'yes ma'am' followed, but she was already gone.

I walked to the medbay to tell Toby and Bea. There, I saw Bea's beautiful long black hair had been cut short to a little above her shoulders. I suppose I should have been supportive and told her that she looked gorgeous. I didn't.

"What did you do to your hair?" I screeched.

"How is it?" She asked.

"It's ok, but your hair, they're, they're, gone!"

"Is it that bad?" I was about to yell, 'YES, they're that bad.

Until Toby came from further in the room and said, "No, they're not. In fact, I like it better like this."

I again was about to say, who asked you?

I saw that Bea blushed. Bea. The ever loud, chatterbox. She blushed.

I sighed. "The head? She's asked us to assemble in the auditorium."

Once we reached, the whole hall was chattering. 2nd years, 3rd years.

"Silence." Alana Brown said. Everyone ignored her.

"Next one to speak is expelled." Silence ensued. She gave a cold smile. "Now that I have your attention, I would like to make a few announcements. Firstly, the first month you spent here was a trial. Your real classes will start now. They will be tougher, but you have to be willing to make the jump. First years, you will be assigned a second." Mutters followed. What's a second?

What does she mean? What-

"A second," she continued as if she had heard the mutters. "A second is your partner. Your best friend, if you will. They will be your go-to person. You can depend on them as much as you want. That is a second." The 2nd and 3rd years nodded knowingly. A first year shouted, "Do we get to choose? If yes, I'm taking Toby!"

"No. You do not get to choose. They are assigned and the papers are kept in your room. Also, they will be of the opposite gender. Both of you will be equals, and how better to establish that then forcing you to be so?"

Mutters of noo, why and stupid rule followed.

"Next, we will address your life classes. They are not survival skills anymore. Now, they will be self defense and projects. Aptitude."

Everyone stayed silent.

"Lastly, we address the uniform. It will be worn uniformly and not to look better. Are. We. Clear?"

Her cold eyes seemed to search the crowd for denial. Then she looked at me. Her eyes turned colder, if that was possible. Then she walked off the stage. Bea and I walked back to our room.

"Found the papers!" She yelled, waving the papers around.

"I'm with Harry. Who's Harry?" She wondered.

"Who's my second?" I inquired.

"Your second is- oh ho ho, you are not going to like this. Three guesses. It's the guy you keep flirting with."

"Pass."

"The guy who bullied you?"

Fear clutched at my heart. "Sam?"

"The one who calls you blue."

"No. Tell me you're kidding." I said as I snatched the paper from her. "No!" I groaned.

She giggled. "Oh man. This is ridiculous. Remember when you laughed at me? This is karma."

I was mad. Something was wrong. This couldn't be right.

I walked past Jay who apparently was having the same conundrum.

"You can't be my second." He said.

"I know, I'm going to try to complain."

He looked insulted. As if he hadn't just declared that we couldn't be partners. We walked together to the head office.

"Ma'am, I-" I stopped when I saw she was in the middle of a meeting. She looked at me with curiosity.

"Are you always this confident?" She asked in.. awe?

"I-I-I'm sorry, ma'am, I-"

"I simply meant, you had social anxiety, didn't you?"

I nodded. She waved away the other people.

"What are you here for?" She asked after staring at me for a while.

"Ma'am, w-we believe you might have made a mistake. He," I pointed to Jay. "Cannot be my second."

"Yes, exactly." He added.

"We've thought this through. I'm sorry, but we cannot change your second. Have a nice day." The way she said it made it final. I was stuck with him. Great. As I was walking out, I couldn't help but look at her papers. One paper in particular stuck out to me. It was..

The Aurae. What? Why was our head messing with them?

I needed to find out what was in those papers.

I had been so deep in my thoughts, I hadn't noticed Jay staring at me.

"What?" I asked.

"What, what?" He asked me.

"Why are you staring at me?"

"I- You noticed?"

"Of course I did, it's creepy."

"I wasn't staring, I was saying something."

"What were you saying?"

He sighed and put his hands in his pockets. "Never mind."

The next day, we went through classes normally until life.

"Pair up with your second." Mr. Olset cried.

I stood next to Jay.

"We will be learning self defense. We wish for you to fight your second. The winner will get chocolate."

Fight? Strange. Then again, I had been through stranger. I fought Jay. His height was a definite advantage and that was why I reached the medbay for the second time. During the science class, a stinkbomb exploded. 

Everyone was wondering who it was, but the answer was in plain sight. Jay was the only one who seemed happy, not surprised. It must have taken a lot of stealth to do this and that too on the first day.

Gears clicked into place in my brain, and I began to formulate a plan. Bea? No, she'd be too loud. Toby? I didn't know him at all. But Jay? Aah, now he was a good partner in my plan. But why would he agree? I'd have to offer him something. But maybe he'd just help for the fun of it.

 Maybe. I'd ask him after the sessions were over. That evening, I had another b****y nose.

I went to get it fixed and afterward, told Bea I was going.

"Where?" She asked, annoyingly nosy.

"It's a secret." I replied, trying to keep my annoyance in control.

"Fine. But I'm your friend. You can tell me, right?"

"I'm going to Jay's room."

I shouldn't have said that, I should not have said that.

She widened her eyes and laughed heartily.

"It's not a big deal," I insisted and was ignored.

"You like him!" I blushed at the possibility.

"No. I-" I'd have to tell her the truth or my life would forever be insufferable. "I need his help to sneak into the head office."

"Boring!" She called. But I had proved myself to her. Thank goodness. I walked over to the boys' dorm. He was sharing a room with Toby. Great. I walked over to him and asked him, "Can we talk? Alone?" I added as Toby looked at me, interested.

"Fine." He grumbled. He was less awkward than when he was with Bea. Interesting. I'd have to tease Bea about this later.

He left the room and since I wasn't asked to sit, I sat down anyway. "So?" Jay prompted me. His unsettling blue eyes unsettled me more than usual.

"I-, ahem, I-I need your help."

"In what? Let's hope it's not your self defense, because I can't work miracles." He said, pointing to my bruises.

I was exasperated. "I can't give you anything in return."

"Then it's not a deal. When you have something I want, you can ask for my help."

I thought so. "What do you want?"

"Either the real reason your hair are blue, a beluga whale, or you to beat me in one self defense session. Then we'll see."

"My hair are like that."

"Why aren't your eyebrows blue then?"

"I don't know! I don't like it, I'd change it if I could. Why won't you belive me?"

"I don't belive you."

Oh, my God. I walked out. A beluga? Nope. My hair color's reason? He didn't believe me. I'd have to beat him. How could I? I wasn't tall and strong. But I was small and quick. I'd read about many short but strong fighters. They're fictional! A voice in my head screamed. Yes, but I learnt from them.

They're not real, stupid!

Of course. As I walked in my room, Bea looked at me and wiggled her eyebrows. "What happened? He didn't dump you, did he?"

I groaned. "We're not dating. We don't even like each other!"

She raised her hands in mock surrender.

The whole week I tried to win. Whenever I'd get even a little bit closer, I'd fall again. I needed his help. Desperately. But I wasn't wasting my weekend. So when Bea asked me to go to the welcome back party that the eldest pupils, the 3rd years were holding, I said no. I had some serious reading to catch up on.

A main character had died. The pain of connecting with the book was too severe. I lay down on my face, trying not to cry.

"Are you ok?" She asked me.

"You mean physically," came my muffled voice from the bed. "Or emotionally?"

"Oh. Someone died, huh." Bea had grown accustomed to my regular excitement when it came to books. "We've got to get ready for the party."

"No."

"You can come. It'll be fun!" Toby said. I didn't look up, but my tone was surprised. "Toby? Is there someone else too? Harry?"

Harry, Bea's second had also grown close to me.

"No, but I'm there." Jay's voice spoke up. I very nearly raised my head but the pain was too great.

"The party isn't here, is it?" I asked.

"I wish." Snorted Bea. "Now, you boys will go out. We've got to change."

"Can't we stay?" Jay asked and probably grinned his trademark grin.

"No." Bea announced. "Go away!"

"Fine, fine." I heard footsteps leave the room.

"Don't tell me I'm going."

"The teachers have allowed us this time. There won't even be any police at the end."

"What?" I snapped my head up.

Oh, I realized. My health had improved. Maybe, maybe I didn't need to be angry at everyone all the time.

This was weird. Bea was blabbering again. Perhaps, just perhaps, I could go. What could go wrong? And perhaps I'd be able to persuade Jay to tell me his weak spot. I could try.

"I'll go." I said.

"What?" Bea said, not quite believing. "Really?"

"Yeah. I have this cool dress and I could go. I mean, if you want me to. If you don't want me t-"

"Are you kidding? It's going to be awesome having you there. Ok, let's get dressed. I'll do your makeup-"

"Don't push it."

She muttered something about a stubborn British accent which I didn't get. I suppose that was for the best. I got dressed in my black dress. It wasn't too short, but sleeveless. It had frills at the bottom. Before I hear judgement, I declared, "It was Jen who chose the dress." Bea looked at me.

"You look cool." She said, gaping at me. I grabbed a pair of green sneakers, which wouldn't have been Jen's first choice. She had tried to force some heels in my bag but I had shrugged her off. And then thrown the heels.

"Take those off." Bea said, disgusted.

"What's wrong with them?" I asked, insulted.

"They're ruining your outfit. Don't you have a black pair?"

"I do, but I like these-"

"Nope."

Grumbling, I put on my black shoes. As I walked out I felt self conscious as Toby, Jay and Harry stared.

"What? Is something wrong?"

Mutters of no, nope, of course not, followed.

"What?" Bea appeared beside me. "She too hot for you to handle?"

I wanted to crawl into a hole and die. This was embarrassing. Had my cheeks been a little bit hotter, I would've melted. We had met Harry and he turned out to be sweet and nice. He was the male version of Bea, though.

"You look nice." He said and blushed.

He and Jay must've had a fight or something, because Jay was glaring at him. "Shouldn't we be leaving?" I asked.

"I'm new to this whole thing, but should we reach before the party's over?"

Bea grinned. "Sarcasm! New. I like it."

We walked on to an area outside the school, near the beach.

I suppose that is why so many people enjoy Hawaii. The beaches. I hadn't even gone to the beach once. I hadn't even considered it. But I suppose, it was quite beautiful. And as I looked at my friends I felt even better. Bea, looking beautiful even with her short black hair, her green eyes shining. Harry, with his blonde hair and brown eyes laughing at his own thoughts. Toby, with his black hair and grey eyes. He was looking at me. I smirked a little. He smiled back. Then Jay. Was he my friend, though?

Yes, I decided. Last chance for him. His blue eyes looked more twinkly now than ever and his brown hair were messy. People around us were looking at us. Then I heard the familiar whispers. Her hair, oh how strange. Why would she do that? I had tried to dye my hair black. And brown. But the dye never stuck. Harry looked over at me and came toward me. He seemed to have heard a whisper. 

"It's ok." He whispered and squeezed my hand, giving me a warm feeling all the way till my toes. We walked toward the water separating here and there, seeing a classmate occasionally mingling with people. 

I saw Sam a few times and hoped he wouldn't see me. He didn't. I talked to Harry for quite some time until I saw the food. It was all set up beautifully and I immediately tuned out whatever Harry was saying.

"And I died." He finished, looking at me suspiciously. "I died. Hello?"

"Oh, sorry, I- food." I pointed to the buffet laid out.

He laughed good naturedly. "Let's go."

He got up off the sand and helped me up. We walked over and piled our plates with food. We were just waking back when I tripped over someone's foot. "Sorry." I muttered and began to pick up the plate.

"Hey, loser. I heard your dad died. There's a rumor he killed himself. Is that true?"

Anger flared in me. "No."

"Please. Don't lie. I'd suicide too if I had a disappointment like you."

Through the corner of my eye, I could see Jay holding Bea back.

"He was ill. You can go now." I said, still not meeting his eyes. 

"Oh, no. I still wanna have some fun with you. What are you doing here? Who invited you?"

I didn't answer.

He forced my chin up. "I asked you something."

In anger, I shoved his hand away. "I'll go if you want. But never," I inched closer to him threateningly until we were only inches apart. "Ever touch me."

I walked off in a rage. I would've noticed if I had been in a better mood. Perhaps I would've even laughed about someone doing the stupid act I did. But I wasn't in a good mood. I didn't laugh about the stupidity of the event that would occur. And the last thing I saw before I blacked out was a car. Uh oh. I was in trouble.