Listen To Your Heart

A cold wind blew out the window as Yvette Asheye climbed the stone steps of the east tower of Nevettia Stronghold. She pulled her cloak closer to her when she felt a chill down her spine and sighed. She had been living in the north of Mercia for more than twenty years since she married Lord Ricardus, the liege lord of those vast and cold lands and yet she never got really used to the cold. She missed the summer days at Prymorith, where she grew up. She missed feeling the sun kissing her skin while she played alongside her younger sister, Emèlie, how it made her red hair glow like it was on fire and how she enjoyed sneaking out her father’s keep with the cook’s daughter to swim in the cold river, hidden by the large trees of the forest nearby the keep to ease the heat waves. Yvette still remembered the day she was told she would marry Ricardus. She was ten, he was eleven and they only met at that very day. He was the middle child of the Lord of Nevettia. He wasn’t meant to succeed his father, that was his older brother who was already promised to another and she knew she shouldn’t expect better than she already was used to. Her children weren’t supposed to be heir of the greatest stronghold of the north. They would inherit lands, of course, smaller ones though. However, no one saw a Viking raid coming to the north a few years after their engagement. Ricardus’ father and brother perished in battle, so he became the new Liege Lord of Nevettia when he was only sixteen. The day after he was named, Ricardus rode back to Prymorith, honouring his father’s will to marry Yvette, making her his Lady. She never expected for their relationship to develop the way it did. She admired him for the honoured warrior he was and was strangely attracted to his harsh northern beauty, which wasn’t common at the south, where men had softer features. But she learned throughout the years how kind and generous he could be, especially towards her, which made love grow between them. Almost 25 years later, they still had a strong marriage and five beautiful children. Theobald was the eldest, he was married and his wife Giselle was already pregnant with their second child. Theo would be the next Lord of Nevettia and he would spend most of his time with his father attending meetings with Nevettia’s bannermen and learning how to rule. Anne came next; she was as beautiful as her mother with her long red hair and emerald eyes. She was living in the west at her husband’s keep, but for the next month they were both staying at Nevettia for the great tournament her father was throwing. Elsie was the middle child and she had the northern looks just like her father. With pale skin, long curly black hair and almond eyes, Elsie had a different kind of beauty which was highlighted when she wasn’t dirty from riding horses, sword fighting and archery, for Yvette’s despair. Noah and Mylla were the twins and also the younger ones. Noah had a magical touch for music while Mylla was already a well-known bookworm. Yvette stopped when she reached the room Anne was sharing with her husband and knocked. She knew Anne’s husband, Philippe, was out hunting with his knights, so her daughter would be alone. “Come in,” Yvette heard Anne answering and she walked into the room. Anne, who was standing by a mirror, looked back quick enough just to see who was entering her chambers, and kept brushing her hair. “Good morning, dear,” Yvette stood beside her daughter. “Hello, mother. I’m almost ready for the opening ceremony,” Anne smiled. “You look beautiful as always. Does your husband have any intentions on walking in with you during the ceremony?” “You know how he gets when he’s gone on a hunt. He won’t come back until he killed something,” Anne walked away from her mother to put down her brush. “I don’t get why he had to go on a hunt before the opening ceremony. It won’t look good for our guests to see you walking in alone.” “That’s just how he is, mother. Do you really think he cares about a tournament that isn’t being thrown in his own honour?” “He is part of the family now and he also signed in for the joust. The least he is expected to do is walking in with his wife and honour his father by law,” Yvette was unpleased with Philippe's lack of commitment, being the next Lord of Elopia he should know better about diplomacy and the importance of showing off an united front as a family. “Oh, Mother, I really believe that you have better things to worry about than Philippe's absence,” Anne answered. “For instance, making sure Elsie is presentable for her future husband. Have you told her that she is expected to accept Nycholas Sternlash’s proposal?” “Not yet. I was planning on doing that while the maids were doing her hair, so there’s nowhere she can run to. But that’s exactly why I’m here. Have you seen your sister? I’ve sent the maids to bathe her and dress her up, but apparently, her chambers were empty when they got there.” “You sound like you were really expecting Elsie to wait quietly in her room for all that,” Anne laughed. Her sister never enjoyed the tasks that were meant for a lady. She hated being squashed into tight dresses, staying all day knitting and sewing, or at least trying to, and gossiping with all the other girls. Elsie wasn’t a proper lady like Anne, she didn’t want to get married and be bossed around by a husband. She wanted to sail the world, live adventures and most of all she wanted to be free of all the expectations her family had of her from being a high born lady. Yvette frowned at her daughter’s joke and Anne set a straight face again. “No, I haven’t seen her. She’s probably off riding in the woods or trying to find a way to get into the archery contest.” “Sometimes I honestly believe that she does that to make sure I go crazy. She is sixteen already. It’s past time she learned to behave properly. What would the Sternslashes say? Your father worked so hard to get this engagement and he’s definitely not accepting no for an answer. And it is not like she’s getting a bad arrangement. She’s still staying in the North, just a day of riding away from here; the Sternlashes are your father’s bannermen, so they know better than to cause her any harm and Nycholas is just a year older than her. He really seems like a respectful and gentle young man. And above all, one day she will be Lady of Shattered Lake. It’s not a high status on Mercia, but it is still a title of some importance. She will have just as much comfort than she does here.” “Mum, I’m not the one who needs convincing. But don’t worry, Elsie may be a free spirit but she also knows she has a duty to the family and I’m sure she won’t let Father down. She is his favourite after all,” Anne replied and held a hand up when her mother tried to disprove her last words. “You know it’s true, don’t deny it. We all know it and I’m not jealous, honestly.” “Alright, alright,” Yvette walked back to the door. “I just wished she showed that kind of consciousness. I’d be much more at peace with all this. But no, she has to like archery and sword fighting and walking around in pants, for God’s sake and spending time with the servants. Especially the smith boy. Gilbert, isn’t it?” she asked and Anne nodded. “Apparently, Elsie spent the whole afternoon in the forge with him again yesterday. If the servants are already talking about this, I don’t want to hear what kind of other rumours they might be spreading. This can turn into such a disaster.” “There’s always going to be rumours around here. I wouldn’t bother if I were you. Elsie’s relationship with Gilbert is nothing, really. They’ve been best friends since he came to us as a little boy, remember? He’s like an older brother to her, just like Theo.” “I just hope you are right, my dear. If you are finished, could you please help me look for her? I have so much to take care of still. And if you find her, take her immediately to her chambers and ask for the maids to call for me.” “Don’t worry, Mother, I will find her and everything will go the way it should,” Anne answered and they both left the room. Anne made her way on her own out of the castle and into the courtyard. On her way out, she thought about how much she’d like to come back home. Her married life was nothing like she expected it to be. She didn’t love her husband and he definitely wasn’t a sweet hero from her nanny’s tale. She was sold like a sack of potatoes when her father and his sealed the marriage upon commercial interests between their two realms. Anne was taken to Philippe's keep to be some kind of pretty decoration like the silverware and when the time came, to be a mare to breed his children. The first time Anne met her husband, they were both children and she spent days dreaming about their wedding and their children and being a Lady of an important realm in the west and how it would all be like a fairy tale. When they met again, years later, it was to celebrate the official engagement. They spoke at best ten words to one another and Philippe didn’t even bother to courtship his future wife. Anne thought it was normal. She couldn’t expect him to have feelings for her while they barely knew each other. Their love would grow with time, just like her mother told her it happened to her and Lord Ricardus. However, time passed, they got married and Anne left for her new home. Philippe showed her who he really was. He’d only come to her room when it was time to conceive children and between them it was never love making, it was only s*x. He would spill his seeds inside her and leave the room barely looking at her. Everyone knew about Philippe's escapades to the w***e houses, when he didn’t take a mistress or two to his own keep. The first one he brought home, Anne felt enraged and went to confront her husband. It was also the first time he hit her to show who had the power. It was not always that he was violent, but it was Anne who suffered on the few times he was, mainly because the cause of his rage was usually her inability to get pregnant. Sometimes it was just because he was angry for not getting things his way. He never hit her in the face, though, only in places that she could cover with clothes. They were married now for almost two years and yet she hadn’t been able to provide Philippe with an heir, even after all the efforts of seeing healers and drinking all kinds of teas and herbal mixtures. By now she already knew to stay out of her husband’s way unless he came to her, which now wasn’t hard for her to do and she even prayed selfishly that he had another mistress for him to taunt and to please him. Brushing all the terrible thoughts off her head, Anne kept walking to the tents set for the tournament glad that at least in her old home she could walk freely through the lands. She went straight to Roulf, the master at arms of Nevettia, who was in charge of the contestants. Roulf was shouting orders as loudly as he could, but his tent was so crowded with people coming and going, arranging the tournament’s last details that it was hard to say if anyone was actually hearing what he was saying. Anne had to tap him on the back so he would turn to her. “My lady! I am so sorry for this mess,” he said loudly bowing to her. “This bastards still haven’t understood that the ceremony is about to start in a few hours,” he looked back to shout again. “Can we talk somewhere a little less loud?” Anne replied almost shouting as well. Roulf nodded and followed Anne’s lead out the tent and into the courtyard again in a spot with less people and less noise. “I’m sorry again for all that, my lady. How can I be at your service?” Roulf asked swiping the dirt of his face with the back of his hand, which made his face even dirtier. “It’s okay, Roulf. I was wondering if you have seen my sister,” Anne replied. “I haven’t seen lady Elsie today, my lady, I’m sorry again,” the man said as his son, James, passed right beside them carrying a small cart with swords and a few pieces of armour. “Lady Elsie?” James stopped by to interfere in the conversation. “I just saw her near the forge where I went to get these,” he said and pointed at his cart. “I knew I should’ve gone there first,” Anne said more to herself than anyone else. “Thank you, James. I’ll leave you two to work again.” Roulf and James bowed to her and Anne left on a hurry pace to the forge. Elsie will never learn, she thought. She entered the castle again and passed through the kitchens. She had to dodge many servants with big trays of fruits and wine bottles, while the smell of the roasts and cakes being baked made her hungry. A cook’s apprentice, who always had a big crush on Anne, made his way towards her with a small lemon cake on his hand. “For you, my lady,” he said with a genuine smile. Anne was taken by surprise, but she stopped and took the cake smiling back. “Thank you, Jack,” she said taking a bite. “It’s really good!” “Jackson! Stop bothering the lady and get your arse back to work,” the cook yelled at his apprentice. “I’m coming,” Jackson answered and looked back at Anne still smiling. “I’m glad you liked it, my lady, I made them thinking about you.” Anne felt a warmth in her heart that she hadn’t felt in years and she was just happy to see a man flirting with her, even if he was just a kitchen boy. However, she definitely would have to keep that a secret. If her husband found out that Jackson was a little more than nice to her, he wouldn’t live long and she would absolutely have the bruises to remember it. “Jackson!” the cook was now behind him and hit him hard on the legs with his dishrag. “You better get your shameless arse to your station or you’ll only eat what the dogs leave for dinner, if they leave anything at all.” “You better go before he hits you again or even makes you starve,” Anne laughed at the small jump Jackson did when he was hit. “He would never. I’m the best apprentice he’s got,” he mocked and started walking backwards to his station. “There will be plenty more of those in the feast, my lady. Enjoy them as much as you want!” Anne laughed again and left the kitchen eating the rest of the lemon cake she was given. She made her way through the long passage that connected the kitchens with the back of the castle where the forge was located alongside a small cottage where Ury, the blacksmith and Gilbert, his apprentice, lived. As she approached the end of the passage, she heard Elsie shouting happily at someone. “Is that the best you can do? I’m a girl, three years younger and I’m still beating you!” Anne stood at the door jamb a bit further so her sister couldn’t see her, but close enough for her to see what Elsie was doing and with who she was doing it. Anne couldn’t help but feel surprised to see her sister duelling with wooden swords against Gilbert. Theo was also there, watching them from a closer distance and it seemed he was encouraging the duel and even helping Elsie improve her skills. How outrageous! If it wasn’t enough that Father allowed Elsie to practice sword fighting so she’d stop throwing tantrums, Theo is now inciting this behaviour like it’s going to lead her somewhere, Anne thought, but kept watching to see how it would end. Elsie kept clashing her wooden sword against Gilbert’s as they both swung around each other. Suddenly, Elsie managed to make Gilbert trip and with a few more swings, he fell on the muddy ground. Elsie walked up to him and pointed her fake sword at his gasping chest. “You’re dead,” she said solemnly, but a second later she was grinning, and so was he. “You’re getting good, Elsie!” Theo said. “You’ll see, Theo. I’m going to show Father my skills this tournament. When I win, he’ll have to anoint me a knight,” she replied putting the hair that fell out of her ponytail out of her sweaty face and Theo laughed. “I think Gilbert hit you hard on the head if you think this is ever going to happen. You’re good, don’t get me wrong. You can defend yourself better than most men I know, but you know this is just for fun and that you won’t make a living out of this. You know your duty is to become a lady and give you husband heirs, Elsie,” Theo said with a tiny bit of pity in his tone. “You do know that there are women who are knights. I am going to be one of them.” Elsie answered angrily. “You can shove your duty up your arse.” “That’s not proper language for a lady, you know?” Theo laughed again. “But alright, if you’re saying so. I cannot wait to see you anointed knight then,” he started walking away from them. “I have to go now and you should be getting ready for the ceremony. Mum must be going crazy after you. Good fight, though.” Theo walked back to the passage while Elsie kept swearing at him for not believing in her. He was caught off guard when he saw Anne with her arms crossed under her chest. “Don’t give me that mum look,” he said. “You shouldn't be encouraging her like this,” Anne replied. “It’s her last days here of freedom here with us, Annie. The least we could do is let her enjoy it before she goes away,” Theo shrugged and passed his sister towards the castle again. Anne sighed and let her arms down taking a few steps forward to call her sister. It was when she heard Elsie and Gilbert’s conversation. They still hadn’t noticed her watching them. “Aren’t you going to help me?” Gilbert grinned. He was still lying on the ground leaning on his elbow. He lifted a hand to Elsie pull him up. “You’re such a girl,” she teased him taking his hand on hers. However, when she was just about to pull him up, he used his strength from his well-defined muscles to pull her down, making her fall on top of him at first and then on the mud next to him. “Oh, no, you didn’t!” she exclaimed. After the scene she just witnessed, Anne was about to interrupt them, but things didn’t just stop there. Gilbert was now pulling Elsie on top of him and Anne froze at that view. “Did you realize you just lost to a girl?” Elsie asked Gilbert as he wrapped his arms around her waist. “Perhaps I was going easy on you,” he smirked. “No, you weren’t. You put strength on your hits. I could feel it.” “I was faking it.” “You’re such a liar,” Elsie replied pulling herself out of him, sitting down and throwing a hand full of mud at him. “No, I’m not,” he grinned throwing mud back at her. “Then admit it. You lost to a girl,” she crossed her arms. “Fine. I lost to a girl,” he sat down in front of her and put a lock of hair behind her ear. “A very beautiful girl,” he smiled and leaned in to kiss her. “Gilbert,” she put a hand on his chest and stopping him. “What if someone sees us?” “There is no one around,” he replied. He put his right hand on her waist to pull her closer to him, while he rested his left hand on her cheek. Elsie didn’t put any resistance and wrapped her arms around his neck and leaning forward. So she kissed him. A passionate, hot kiss. It was when Anne came back to herself and she couldn’t watch that anymore. “Elsie!” she yelled and walked up to them.