Over Me

chapter 8

I've been walking around with my head down. I'm so over being blue, crying over you. It's been five months and I made up my mind a few weeks ago. I'll let you go. But what the f**k I am thinking?! Like... I feel like I miss you, I never felt this way before. I mean how? Have I yet let you go?! You know I'm talking to you every day, every night. And through all those times my tears are always up and afterward falling. I should've let you go. No. I already let you go but why?! I told myself I'll let you go. But why?!

I saw you in my dreams slowly disappearing but why the hell you're smiling?! I don't know what you wanna say. Why would you have to leave?! I saw all of them flooded in tears clouded with sadness because of you. Because of you, I knew my worst weakness. And it is to lose someone I love and to see them cry. I didn't mean to tell bad words, I'm sorry I'm not mad but I just wish you could give me a sign. Tell me not to cry at least once in my dream. It's been almost six months, and I miss you.

I know... Kyle told me something he pinned in my mind. He said, "Let it go and create your best life. You would never allow a thief to enter your house and live there rent-free, so why do you allow thoughts that steal your joy to enter and live inside your mind?"

Well, he was pretty right. Most of the time I talk to myself and say, "Let it go, the things that have happened in the past... the things that aren't happening right now... Let it go. If I want to be free, I should stop locking myself in the prison of my past. If I want to see the light, I should stop holding in the darkness of my past. If I want to move on... I should release the heavyweight from my back. If I don't want this pain to win... I should let it go. I should move on and create my best life. Had a moment of confrontation? Let it go. Don't allow it to live in your mind, stealing the joy from. the rest of your day. If someone did me wrong, Let it go. They will just ruin more of my life if I allow them inside my mind like a virus which only affects the quality of my life in every other area. The best revenge is always moving on. Letting go. Showing my ego is brave enough to let go. Showing I was strong enough to enjoy my life. to live my life fully, regardless of 'what happens' or 'who isn't doing the right things by me'. I should let them have their accidents somewhere else or karma themselves. Life hasn't gone as planned? It doesn't for anyone. Move on. Focus on the good. Those who live amazing lives haven't got lucky. When things don't work out, move on quickly and focus on the next positive. They drop the negative like a high potato and focus on what they can do today to get in a better state. They don't seek sympathy from family or friends. They focus on what is good in their life and let go of the negatives. Don't cheat on your future with your past. It's over. Commit your future and it will be a strong healthy one. If you don't let go of your past... your future will suffer. understand this very important fact. YOU ARE THE ONE WHO SUFFERS THE MOST WHEN YOU HOLD ON TO RESENTMENTS WHEN YOU SEEK REVENGE... YOU ARE THE ONE WHO WINS WHEN YOU DO LET GO."

The key to a good life is this: If you're not goin' to talk about something during the last hour of your life don't make it a top priority during your lifetime. Maybe we should all take that advice. Your ego will tell you, once everything is perfect, then I'll be happy. But your soul knows the truth. Be happy, then everything is perfect. No. Life circumstances won't be perfect, but if you can get into the right space, the toy can then get to the Understanding that everything happens for a reason and be at peace with that. So, be happy, do whatever it takes to find your happiness. Not because everything is good, but because you see the good in everything. Not because every circumstance is a miracle, but because you see the miracle in life itself.

Leave the darkness of my past behind so I can focus on letting in the light of my future.

At some point, I just have to let go and move on. It might be the hardest thing in the world to do, but you have to summon all of the strength you gossip can to finally let it go. Some people and things just aren't going to be meant for you, no matter how much you wish they were. But, know that it's okay for things to not work out. Nobody's life is a straight line that makes perfect sense. Everybody has twists and turns, and everyone has to run around every now and then. So when you find yourself wishing and hoping things out of your control would change, summon all of your strengths to let it go and start heading in a new direction because it'll lead you closer to your true path.

Soon, all of this weight you are carrying will fall gently away. Soon, these chains won't be able to hold you ever again and your past will lose it's grip on you. Soon, you'll move forward into peace and find a new beautiful spark of joy... no matter what you are going through right now, know that it really will be okay even if it doesn't seem like it right now, I promise that soon you will make it through these rough waters and come out so much stronger on the other side.