Am I Just Worthless?

On the day of the Winter Solstice, a snowfall blanketed Jiangcheng. In the hospital corridor, Chu Yuxuan, with a face full of exhaustion, paced back and forth anxiously. Moments later, he saw the doctor coming out of the ward and rushed over, asking urgently, "Doctor, how is my grandmother?" The doctor, a man in his fifties with thinning hair, closed the door and gently shook his head, sighing, "It's hard to say if she'll make it through the night. I'll prescribe some painkillers. Administer an injection every three hours to make sure she passes peacefully." Chu Yuxuan felt a wave of dizziness, his legs growing weak as he slumped against the wall. After a long pause, he took off his glasses, wiped away the tears from the corners of his eyes, and finally gathered the courage to enter the ward. His grandmother had just received her pain medication. With an oxygen tube attached, she lay peacefully on the bed, her face turned to him with a gentle smile. "Yuxuan, where’s Xia Zhu?" She likely knew her time was coming to an end and wanted to see her granddaughter-in-law one last time. Chu Yuxuan fought back his tears, sat on the stool by the bed, and forced a smile. "Grandma, she’s probably busy filming today." The elderly woman's cold hands clasped her grandson's, her expression unchanged. "Being busy is good... Yuxuan, call her for me. I want to talk to her. I’m afraid... I might not be able to wait much longer." "How could that be? You'll live a long life!" Chu Yuxuan squeezed her hand, but seeing the determination in her eyes, he had no choice but to take out his phone and call Xia Zhu. "Sorry, the number you have dialed is currently unavailable..." Chu Yuxuan frowned and said to his grandmother, "Forget it, she really is busy. Grandma, are you hungry? I can go get you something to eat." The elderly woman closed her cloudy eyes, her pale lips moving slightly, "I’d like some of the tomato and egg soup you make." The tumor hospital wasn’t far from home, just a ten-minute drive. After thinking for a moment, Chu Yuxuan called for a nurse, gave some instructions, and hurried home in his second-hand Skoda. In the underground parking lot, after parking the car and opening the door, he suddenly saw a familiar figure. Not far away, by a white Range Rover, Xia Zhu was tightly embracing a man in a suit, crying as if her heart would break. Chu Yuxuan’s heart skipped a beat, and his body froze on the spot. That man, Chu Yuxuan knew all too well—it was Gao Ning, Xia Zhu's childhood friend and her "white moonlight." Three years ago, for some unknown reason, Gao Ning heartlessly abandoned Xia Zhu and went abroad alone. During that time, Xia Zhu was in a daze, lost and vulnerable. People say that women are most likely to fall in love when they are at their weakest. That's how Chu Yuxuan, ever the lovesick follower, got the chance to marry her. Even though Chu Yuxuan knew there was someone Xia Zhu could never let go of, he believed that no heart could stay cold forever. But now... Gao Ning gently patted Xia Zhu’s back, comforting her softly, "Little Bamboo, three years ago, I honestly thought my illness was incurable. Going to America was just a last resort, I thought I’d die sooner or later. That’s why I had to leave you behind... You don’t know how much it hurt. It was like I pushed away the girl I loved most with my own hands, and I even wished with all my heart that you’d find a man who loved you more than I did!" Xia Zhu sobbed, "How could you be so selfish? How could you be so foolish? Ning-ge, for the past three years, I’ve thought about you constantly! I just knew there had to be a reason you left me! After this... you won’t leave me again, will you?" Gao Ning gently stroked her cheek, his eyes filled with pity, "Silly girl, I won’t leave again! I know you never really loved that man named Chu, right?" Xia Zhu froze for a moment, then bit her lip. Before she could respond, her eyes fell on Chu Yuxuan, who was slowly walking toward them. "Let her go." Hearing the sudden cold voice behind him, Gao Ning instinctively released his arms. When he turned and saw Chu Yuxuan, he was momentarily startled. Then, a mocking smile curled on his lips, and he provocatively wrapped his arm around Xia Zhu’s waist. Xia Zhu’s body tensed slightly. After a brief hesitation, she removed Gao Ning’s hand from her waist and took two steps toward Chu Yuxuan. She couldn’t bring herself to look him in the eye as she softly asked, "Yuxuan, you... you saw everything?" "I'm not blind." Chu Yuxuan’s face was emotionless. He paused, then took a deep breath, "Come with me to the hospital." Gao Ning also stepped forward, eyeing Chu Yuxuan’s shabby attire with a smirk, "You must be Chu Yuxuan, right? I remember back in high school, you were chasing after Xia Zhu. Even back then, you were dressed like a country bumpkin, and now... you’re still the same?" Chu Yuxuan kept his gaze fixed on Xia Zhu, repeating, "Come with me to the hospital. Grandma wants to talk to you." Xia Zhu furrowed her brows, about to speak, when Gao Ning cut in, "Chu Yuxuan, you should know about my relationship with Xia Zhu. And you should also know, Xia Zhu has never actually liked you." At this, Gao Ning pulled out a checkbook from his pocket, tore off a check, and handed it to Chu Yuxuan. His tone was sincere but tinged with mockery, "No matter what, I appreciate you taking care of her these past two years. Write down any amount. Consider it my way of thanking you." Chu Yuxuan could no longer bear it. He shoved Gao Ning aside, shouting, "Did I ask for your opinion?!" Gao Ning stumbled, his back hitting the hood of the Range Rover. He immediately clutched his chest, his face contorting with anger. Xia Zhu's eyes widened suddenly, and she pushed Chu Yuxuan away hard, shouting angrily, "Chu Yuxuan! What are you doing?! He's not feeling well! If something happens to him, can you take responsibility?" She then rushed to help Gao Ning, "Ning-ge, are you okay?" Gao Ning was breathing heavily, biting his lip as if enduring intense pain, "I'm... fine... it's nothing..." "How can it be nothing? I’ll take you to the hospital!" Xia Zhu struggled to help Gao Ning into the passenger seat. As she walked around to the driver's side, she glared at Chu Yuxuan and snapped, "Get lost! I don’t want to see you!" Chu Yuxuan clenched his fists tightly and said, "Xia Zhu, I’m telling you again, come with me to the hospital. Grandma… she’s not going to make it!" But his last words were muffled by the closing car door. As he watched the Range Rover speed away, Chu Yuxuan lightly pushed up the heavy black-framed glasses on his nose and took a deep breath. A bitter smile tugged at the corners of his lips as he muttered to himself, "Forget it... just forget it." When it came to being the perfect "devoted follower," Chu Yuxuan was second to none. He had always harbored the delusion that his efforts could win a smile from the woman he loved, even though he knew deep down that loving someone unconditionally wasn’t the same as being loved in return. But even blind devotion has its limits. In moments like this, to continue clinging desperately, crying, and begging her to look his way would be truly pathetic. Reality is often cruel. When the prince she longed for appears, the most gentle words the princess can offer the daydreaming toad are, "You're a good person." After that, she’ll say, "I know I owe you, but you must stay far away from me," and then fly away happily with her prince. As fate would have it, Grandma didn’t make it through the night. She passed away peacefully at 11:30 p.m. The elders often believe that fallen leaves should return to their roots. Chu Yuxuan hired a hearse from the funeral home and took his grandmother back to their rural hometown overnight. When the neighbors heard the news, they spread it quickly. Many came voluntarily to help, knowing the old woman had no family left except her grandson. Moreover, they knew that a young man like Chu Yuxuan had no experience handling funeral arrangements. After spending the entire night kneeling in the mourning hall, Chu Yuxuan dozed off around noon, exhausted from sleepless nights. Suddenly, his pocket buzzed. He pulled out his phone to find a message on WeChat from someone saved as “Second Brother.” There were four screenshots, accompanied by a single sentence: Make him disappear? The screenshots included two photos of Xia Zhu and Gao Ning walking home, hand in hand, clearly taken by a paparazzo. The other two screenshots were comments from netizens: "Is Goddess Xia about to announce her relationship?" "Congrats! I heard the guy is some rich second-generation heir!" "Isn't that what all celebrities aim for these days? A rich heir, nothing surprising." Xia Zhu was now a top-tier celebrity, and it was normal for paparazzi to follow her 24/7. As for why no one questioned her fidelity... it was because her marriage to Chu Yuxuan had been kept secret, under the pretext of not wanting to affect her career. As it turned out, if you truly love someone, career concerns are just an excuse. Chu Yuxuan pinched the bridge of his nose and texted back to “Second Brother”: Don’t act. Then, he pocketed his phone. At that moment, someone shouted from outside the mourning hall, "The dutiful son, return the guests' courtesy!" Chu Yuxuan hurriedly bowed his head in respect. When he rose, he saw a large, burly man in a suit who had come to pay his respects. The man had to weigh at least 200 pounds, and his suit couldn’t even button up. As he knelt to bow, his belly pressed against his thighs, making for a rather comical sight. After burning two pieces of spirit money, the big man shuffled over to Chu Yuxuan on his knees. With no expression on his chubby face, he furtively pulled a phone out of his pocket and handed it to Chu Yuxuan like they were secret agents. In a low voice, he whispered, "Someone wants to talk to you."