Damned to the Aplha

"Mum, please, stop," I cried and begged as my mother continued her verbal assault at me and my sister. "You are worth nothing. You have brought me nothing but pain and sadness," She continued and continued. I held my baby sister Evie close as she whimpered into my shoulder as we had yet again suffered through our mother’s drunken abuse. Ever since our father, beta Rogan, passed away, our mother has drowned her sorrows at the bottom of a bottle. "Get out of my sight." She spits out at me before swaying her way to the family room. Finally, mum passed out on the mouldy rotten sofa. Pulling myself up from the corner of the kitchen, taking Evie with me. I wipe away the tears on my darling sisters face. "Why does mummy hate us, Helena? what did we do this time? " I looked down at the small child clinging to me, my heart breaking again just like every other time. "She doesn't hate us, Evie. She's just lost right now." I stare into Evie's Emerald's eyes. I hate lying to her, but what other option do I have? At 17, I'm still a minor, a child in the eyes of our pack. They have no idea what goes on in these four walls. To the outside were the perfect family apart from the loss of our father. I plan to leave with Evie the moment I turn 18, my mother, I think, has forgotten my birthday and for that I'm grateful, she’ll be passed out drunk so we can leave without being seen. Evie is 8, and I need to take her with me. I can’t imagine what would happen if I didn’t take her. Before dad passed away we were one of the most prestigious family's of the Silent moon pack, My dad beta Carlos Rogan was best friend of the Alpha , we were always at pack gatherings and party's ect. I remember having friends who I loved to play with Dahlia and Hunter being the two I played with the most. Dahlia and Hunter are Alpha and Luna Greystokes children. We used to play for hours and hours laughing and having fun . Our parents would watch us and laugh along while we played tag or just rough housed as wolves do. After dad died people would come over and offer love and support but my mum refused to answer the door,before long they stopped coming over. I don't remember the last time I saw anyone from my pack. I often dream of my fated mate being Alpha Hunter and him coming to rescue me. Ha! a childs dream. "Come on, Mum is asleep for the night now Evie, let's find something to eat huh"? Smiling at my sister, I make my way around the small dirty kitchen, pulling out the ingredients I have hidden for pancakes. We cook them together, whispering our laughter as we smear the mixture on each other's face, Evie always looks so beautiful when she smiles, I just wish our mum could remember her love for us so I could see it more often. After we ate our pancakes in silence, I took Evie to the bathroom to clean up before bed. Remembering the nights my mother would clean my face, singing or humming a tune. She was so beautiful, caring a vibrant with her long, almost black hair and deep green emerald eyes. I'd stare at her in awe. Now she isn't anything like the women I remember. Once cleaned up in the bathroom, we climb into Evie’s bed, and I hum the lullaby mum used to hum to me, and soon Evie falls fast asleep. I lie awake for maybe another hour. Tonight, I will prepare everything so we can be ready to leave quickly, as tomorrow night is the night. I turn 18 in just less than 24 hours; I’ll be an adult. I check our back packs – clothes, torches and a small first aid kit in Evie’s and the heavier stuff in mine, a tin of change and a hammer – you just never know if you’ll need to defend yourself out there- I have also saved as much as possible and have around £2000 in cash hidden beneath the loose floor board under Evie’s Bed, I slide under with one of the torches to check its still there, sighing with relief seeing the roll of notes tucked away. Mum doesn’t know, but I also have a driving licence. I used the excuse of working extras hours to take the lessons and test I’m hoping I can find a job somewhere far away and earn money for a car. Evie can finally go to school, and I can provide a safe and loving home. It will be strange going rouge, not feeling the pack bond and living amongst humans, but I have to get Evie to safety. The pack members are too blind to see anything wrong. Everyone just thinks mum is still in mourning, not this drunken mess I have to deal with each day. I used to feel pity and sorrow for my mum, losing her fated mate so young and dramatically, but now I only have resentment. Considering we are shifters living in a small close nit pack, you think shed have sought out help, but no, she just drinks herself in oblivion every night and abuses her daughters in the process. Mum has hidden us away to hide her shortcomings from the pack, I have no help either, which is why I’ve decided to run and never look back. With a sigh, crawl out from under the bed leaving the cash where it is for tonight, it's safest there. Mum won't find it. She never even looks in Evie’s room. I sneak out of the room to go grab some food for us to take. I’ve no idea how long it will be before we find food or shelter out there, so I’m going to carry everything I can. A few tins of soup and beans will keep us going for a day or two. I also find some matches, which will be handy if we need a fire to cook or keep warm, and my map and compass. At that moment I spot my dad’s old car keys hanging on the small hook in the kitchen, his car still lives in the garage rusting and covered in dust, he loved that car, will it start? Does it have petrol? Will it wake my mother if I try it? There are so many questions I have asked myself every time I see those keys, I pick them up and look at the old, faded keyring with a picture of my mum, myself and baby Evie in it. We were so happy, my mum’s eyes are bright and full of joy in this faded image, I look like her in so many ways, but it’s been years since either of us were this happy. I place the keys back on the hook, no way I can try and start the car tonight , if my mum takes her medication she wouldn’t wake up if a bomb went off, Ill try it tomorrow then if it starts we can go so far in it before I have to dump the car – wed be caught far to easily driving around in a stolen vehicle, but I can at least get us far enough away within a few hours, before she notices its gone. I sneak past my passed out mum to the front door, opening it carefully and checking that our family camping gear is still in its place, under the old bench to the left. Everything is ready for our escape to a better life. Tomorrow I have work and I hate leaving Evie alone with mum but its only a few hours, usually in the morning mum is actually quiet good, she'll give Evie her breakfast before starting on whatever bottle takes her fancy so I can earn a bit more money before we leave. Mum thinks I only earn £50 a shift, which she takes from me for “shopping” more bottles is more precise, but I actually earn around £170 after being promoted to shop floor manager. Luckily, I work off pack grounds in the local human supermarket. I don’t have to see any shifters, I can’t face them. This also means I have already handed in my notice at work, telling them I am going travelling out of the country since I’ll be 18, without the worry of anyone getting wind of my plan. Knowing I have done all I can for night, I silently get back into bed with Evie, I hold her close with a bittersweet smile. There is one final issue , after midnight tomorrow evening, I may meet my wolf. I'm scared it may ruin the whole plan but I have no idea what to expect since mum never told me how it works , I know it happens at 18 but the exact details?, I have not got a clue. Will it hurt? Will I hurt Evie? Will it change me? Will I be a small or tall wolf? Will my wolf be better than my so-called mother? Will I find a mate someday? I allow just a few tears to trickle down my face, the fear taking hold and with my fate unknown and so many questions, I fall into a fitful and dreamless sleep