ERASED

Chapter Five

LIAM’S POV

“We need to give an impression that we’re madly in love. Hold my hand,” Katrina says holding our her hand to me. I shook my head and pushed her hand away, ignoring the anger and insults I’d have to take as soon as we were out of here. We have already been over this, no unnecessary acts or performances to put up for the media. Appearing together in public spaces is enough.

Even though it has been fifteen years, only one name has been signed on my heart. Ever since she disappeared, Tiana has never left my memory and that gets Katrina upset every single time. I know it’s my fault, I sound pathetic, hopeless, in need of therapy, but I don’t care.

I still find myself wondering, does she still have those bangs that she loved? Does she still dip her bread in hot chocolate no matter how many times I told her it was very weird and should be considered a criminal offence? Would she still love my mom’s spicy foods if she got the chance to eat them? Is her laugh the same as it was back then? Innocent, very high pitched and careless but deeply genuine and sincere that it would cause the people around her to laugh as well, I hope she still lights up the darkest room whenever she walks into it because she lit up my entirely dark world, gave me a reason to believe that life wasn’t always that bitter.

Tiana has her name imprinted on my heart, no one can undo that.

“Did she leave a message for me before running off?” I would always ask her stepfather, he always reminded me of the grinch who stole Christmas with the frown he always had on his face.

“No punk!” He’d yell, “that brat doesn’t give a s**t about you! Don’t come here again!” He would slam the door in my face after that. I came every single day, four weeks straight, no days missed and that was always his answer, Tiana ran off and is never coming back.

I felt betrayed, hurt, and alone all over again even Dylan was there. How could she have left me after all the promises she made to me?

Fifteen years later and a different woman stands beside me. Nothing about Katrina reminded me of Tiana, and I liked it that way.

Tiana’s three years younger than I am, but she always sounded more matured than kids our age.

I moved to Edvert when I was nine and I wasn’t happy about it. Leaving my friends in my old hometown, everyone I knew and moving to a completely new place, new schools and new faces, I remained in my shell for as long as I could but my new school wasn’t even helping matters.

YEARS AGO

“Hey! Glasses boy!” The big bully that always taunted me yelled throwing his shoes at me but I kept walking. I had no friends, I wasn’t speaking to anyone in this new school so you would easily find me alone, the easiest prey to the school’s bad boys and bullies. Hardly got suspended or expelled because their parents brought in the highest contribution, then there’s kids like me barely trying to make two square meals a day,

“Where do you think you’re going boy?” Two of his friends rounded me and blocked my way,

“You’re mute? Hey everybody! The new kid’s dumb. He doesn’t hear us!” They yelled and everyone giggled and laughed. I was humiliated, it was my story for the longest of time. One of them reached for my glasses, snatching it and scratching the bridge of my nose so hard it bled, I could hear my glasses being tossed around as they laughed until I heard it hit the ground. Next thing, they’re pushing me to the ground, kicking my sides, but all I tried doing was use my hand to search for my glasses that were on the floor.

“You poor stinking brat! I’ll make sure you find this school a living hell until you leave! No one likes you boy!” The leader of their gang grabs the collar of my shirt, yelling in my face but it made me nauseous. Whatever meal his mother packed for lunch for him must have had lots and lots of onions. “No one likes you, you’re mixed! Just look at your skin, your hair!” That line wasn’t new to me. Since moving here, it’s all I ever heard, from teachers to students to passers by giving me the stare, they’d say my father had the poorest taste in life that’s why he settled for a black woman and is still very poor.

Today’s words were different, he probably took an entire week to come up with this one,

“Your parents finally realized that you’re their biggest mistake, that’s the only reason they don’t want to recreate any more freaks of your kind!” He laughed, I felt a bunch of sand hit my face so hard, and heard their laughter grow farther and farther from me until I could no longer hear it.

I gave up my search for the glasses and just sat in the middle of the field, unable to cry, or move. I felt helpless, completely helpless, their words, no matter how hard I had to fight it, always pierced me deep, like a sharp edged knife forcefully pushed into my chest and immediately drawn out leaving me to bleed profusely with no means of getting a bandage and help.

My heart felt dark, sad, gloomy, filled with millions of ways to end it all. That day was my last straw, no more fighting it, I couldn’t even fight to save myself. I was a skinny, scrawny kid that lived in the scraps his parents hardly ate out of.

This was until she appeared. I would ignore her at home, whenever she saw me and wave, flashing a bright smile at me, but here I was being helped by the very person that I avoided. I was only nine, but people made it clear they didn’t like me, I’m mixed, the hated race after blacks, why on earth would a white girl bother waving at an outcast like myself?

She handed my glasses to me after the cleaning the lenses with the edge of her school dress, blowing vapour on it and wiping it again, then she took her face towel and wiped my eyes gently with it before placing the glasses on my face for me to behold the kind heart that decided to help me when everyone else turned a blind eye to it.

“Liam, right?” She was a cute little girl, and that made me a lot more conscious of my looks because she looked so put together and I looked like a street beggar, people were staring at us on the field and I got very uncomfortable.

“People are staring, don’t talk to me.”

“Who cares what people think, they’d continue to have their opinions whether you do what they want or not, do what you think is right and I believe there is no harm in speaking to you.”

She continued to brush the sand out of my thick curly hair, “Liam, you don’t have to be alone from now on,” she carried on until she was done. “There’s a lot of sand in your hair, you’d need to wash it off when you get home. Don’t mind those guys, mommy says they’re weak that’s why they’re projecting their insecurities on you. You’re literally the smartest, that’s what I’ve heard I don’t how true it is,” and yes, she was a chatterbox when we first met. She loved talking, and I loved listening. It was always the highlight of my day. She proceeded to gather all my belongings that they threw out of my bag and kicked around, she dusted them off and put them in my bag, all I did was stand and watch her. Who was she?

As if she read my mind, she brought my bag, now dusted and packed up, “I’m Tiana, your neighbour, you always ignore me whenever I wave at you,” I didn’t say anything, I became defensive so I held on to the frown on my face,

“Are you always this chatty, Tiana?”

“I know you don’t like me and that’s okay, it’s a feeling I’m used to. My dad doesn’t like me either, that’s why he left and my mom, she thinks I’m her greatest mistake so sometimes I always get the hard end of her anger, she says I crushed her dreams because she was pregnant with me,” she offloaded, we found ourselves walking together out of the field, the first moment of silence i experienced ever since she helped.

“Hey Liam,” there she went, ruining the peace and quiet. I turned my head to face her, “would you like to be my friend?” No one has ever asked me to be their friend. I was always treated like a plague ever since I came here, a complete outcast that deserves death.

“You…you want to be my friend?”