A DIARY OF A LOST CALL (The Soul Between the Mother and the Child)

Mothers are different: some does know how to cook, some do not; some are caring and loving on the outside, others are frowning like you are the most hostile in the world; some can be the best of friends, a playmate, an advisor, a guidance counselor, and even enemies. Just like how children become different to their mother's eye: some are creative, others are messy; some good with academic, others solve problems with thoughts and critical way; some are smart in memorizing geometry, trigonometry . . . metry, or multiplication table, some prefer arts; some loves orchestra; some loves rocks and pops songs; some sings and brilliant in writing songs; some are becoming hostile, some are becoming angel to their eyes. Unless a baby is locked inside a vacuum room with no polluted air of killer words, no glares and flickers in their eyes, no smiles, and sadness, no kisses and hugs. They are babies imprinted with wings–they don't know what humanity is, what family is, and what a mother is: no life is for them. The first sin of a mother: Made the baby cry for the first time. He is alive. The baby born with eyes is close. Sees darkness alone. However, he can hear his mother's I love you, cries, even curses, and hear how she describes the environment when he opens his eyes. When he does–it's time for a mother to introduce the colors in the color wheel of life. “Mom, which do you want me to hold first, dark or light? Please tell me which one do I choose. I don't know how to live.” That's how attractive life is, is like a palette with thousands of choices of colors. With the experience of a mother, she told the baby, “someday you can choose on your own.” For nine months the mother hears his heartbeat, feels his hunger, sadness, love, and happiness. “Mother knows best”: if the baby in the womb is breathing, crying, sleeping, wondering, feel his excitements, or wants to see the world, also a mother knows even when his weak or dead, and a mother cries when she thinks the baby is alive: A mother's love. According to Myupchar, 2020, in recent discovery in the complexities of human mating and s****l behavior, a mother chooses a sperm that has more chances to live and survive. The sperm never choose to enter the cell, it has been tamed: a baby does not choose a mother. Somehow she chose me.