You Auto-Complete Me

Life, love, and the pursuit of the perfect Englishman…Emily Williams, twenty-something free spirit, is spending a year in England with — horror of horrors — her parents. She’s not going to let that get her down, though…any more than she is brought low by her seemingly hopeless search for love, the ghost that inhabits her underwear drawer, the horrible high school flashbacks that come via a student she tutors, the hot guy she fancies who may or may not be what he appears, or the dishy almost-veterinarian who could be the perfect Mr. Emily…if only he wasn’t elbow-deep in sheep. Literally..Welcome to the world of Emily!EMSTER What, you’re not here?DRU I’m here. What’s up, buttercup?EMSTER I have things to tell you!DRU So tell. I was sext…er…texting the BF.EMSTER !!!DRU J/K. Dish, sister.EMSTER Reasons why my life has gone to hell in a handbasket:In debt up to my armpits due to having to work off paying for ex-boss’s car.DRU Shouldn’t have hit that cop car, huh?EMSTER Forced to give up adorable apartment to live back with the parents while I pay off ex-boss’ car.DRU Also shouldn’t have lipped off to the judge who garnished your wages.EMSTER Forced to go with very same parents to England for a year.DRU Dude.EMSTER OK, that’s not really bad, but I’m on a roll. Humor me.EMSTER Biggest reason life is messed up: Friends with Benefits Fang isn’t around to indulge in benefitting.DRU You got me there. But cheer up, little Emily – life can’t get any worse can it?Readers of the 2003 release The Year My Life Went Down the Loo may recognize passages–this book is an almost complete rewrite and update of that earlier young adult novel, and contains mature themes.