Words better left unsaid

Have you ever felt that sensation wherein you are caught between all that was and all that must be? You feel lost. You feel uncertain. You feel like wandering in a limbo that doesn't have an exit. only an opening and instances that led you to get caught right through it. like a chain knotted in your neck and hindering you to go beyond the four-quarter cell. it is similar to being interrogated after you have done something wrong. sweat dripping all over your face and your eyes keep on wandering from side to side as if your soul has been ripped off inside. you couldn't sit straight, legs shaking, feet thumping, and one could instantly get irritated by your monotonous movements. you, sitting in a chair don't know what to do and couldn't even make your face up to those who are in front of you and at least look them straight in the eyes. thoughts soon start to dig deep into your mind and consume every nerve in your brain until what is left is the overwhelming horror and tremor drawn in your countenance. it is an aspect that someone couldn't understand and not even those who are around you. even if they nod and say they do, deep in the bones of their knuckled consciousness, they don't. they can't comprehend the number of words and explanations you convey. that's how it works even before and it will stay that way until you won't recognize what's going on anymore. you keep looking back to what was there before you, the circumstances that had happened, the future, failures, achievements, downhill and uphill. everything just doesn't seems right. you keep on connecting the dots to figure out a valid explanation for your whirled bizarre situation and only to find yourself standing alone in a middle of a deserted crossroad. legs shaking, feet thumping, body trembling, mind's strangling from the thought people established into you. don't know a freaking thing to do. dumb and lost. have you ever felt that? wherein you can't choose for yourself or walk on your own accord because you are caught between all that was and all that must be. perhaps something needs to be done or to distort if i am to say the exact phrase. to distort the way we think and focus more on ourselves. to never think of what comes next or strangled ourselves on the pressure and burden. yet solely put down the yoke on our shoulders and run wild from the bitter circumstance. create a whole new set of thinking from all that must be to all that i wanted. i think that's where the breakthrough will happen. family×pressure×future