Jessica's POV.
I knew that Ryan was genuinely concerned about me, but I had lived my old life in guilt, and every day I was hoping that I was going to atone for all of the mistakes my luna Shadow curse costs me, yet it keeps piling up and making me make greater and greater mistakes every single time. Just when I thought that I was doing better, I found myself doing far worse than I ever expected I was going to do, and it was eating deep down into me.
Every day I thought I could ever become better than I used to be, but I found myself doing even worse, and I did not want it to happen anymore. At that moment when Ryan revealed that to me, I felt like being dead was going to be better than being alive and putting a lot of people into such misery.
However, Ryan was not going to agree with i
