Chapter 19

2208 Words
I have never felt this guilty in my whole life to the point that I’m thinking that I’ve done the worst crime in the whole world. Louis and I arrived at the airport. We left Palawan first thing in the morning. Throughout the ride, he was asking me if I needed something. He was constantly paying attention to me. He even offered me a piece of his earphones because I couldn’t relax. I don’t really know what has gotten into me. But I felt really nervous that I am inches away from Louis Pascual. Damn, I shouldn’t feel this way. Or maybe I was thinking of the kiss and if I’m going to tell Zian about or not. And it creeps me out. We walked to the exit from the airport and I was surprised to see Zian there, waiting for me. “Hana!” He smiled at me and waved. I suddenly felt worse and even guiltier. I smiled weakly and ran to him to give him a very tight hug. I didn’t care if it looked like a drama shooting but this is all I could do. I could only hug him. Zian chuckled and hugged me back after being startled that I ran to him and just hugged him like that. “Hey, what’s wrong?” He asked me as he tried to look at my face but I couldn’t face him like this, so I hugged him tighter. I don’t even care if I am squishing him. Shit s**t s**t! How could I let Louis kiss me? How did that even happen? And yes, speaking of Louis. I know he is watching right now. I didn’t mean to make him jealous. I won’t ever do that. I’m too old for jealousy games. I shut my eyes and finally got the courage to face Zian. I smiled at him and he is looking at me worriedly. He cupped my cheeks. “Did something happen?” he asked in concern. I smiled and shook my head. “I just missed you.” I told him and he narrowed his eyes on me. “Something happened.” He stated. “You have to tell me that when we get to your pad.” He told me. I sighed and nodded. “How did you know that we’re arriving at this hour anyway?” I asked him. He motioned behind me. “Louis called me. He said your chauffeur won’t be able to make it so he asked me to pick you two up.” He replied. I raised my brow. “And you agreed?” I asked. “You actually agreed to pick us up?” I asked in disbelief. Zian grinned. “What can I do? I can’t let you get into a cab with him. You’ve been with him for too long already.” He replied. I rolled my eyes. “You’re crazy! You should be resting!” I beamed at him. He grinned at me and took my things. “I could only rest when I’m sure that you’re in your pad, resting as well, and not with some guy who I know would do anything to get you.” He replied then took my hand with his freehand. He looked at Louis. “Are you coming or what?” He asked. I heard Louis scoff from behind and followed us to Zian’s car. Zian was about to open the passenger seat for me to get in but Louis got in the way. He looked at me. “You sit in the back seat.” He told me and took over the passenger seat. Zian glared at him but he couldn’t do anything. “Jerk.” He muttered as he watched me get in the back seat. See this is the thing with Zian. He always had to see that I am safe before he thinks of himself. He’s that kind of guy that every girl could dream of. Gentleman, sweet and loving. If you met someone like him, never let him go. “So, how was the resort project?” Zian asked me as he glanced at me on the rear-view mirror. I just shrugged. “Boring.” I replied. Then Louis looked at me on the interior mirror too, his brow raised. I rolled my eyes. “I knew it. I mean, how would you even enjoy when there’s someone taken who badly wants you back?” Zian was being sarcastic. Louis glared at him. “Shut up, Woo, and just drive.” He told him as he gritted his teeth. Zian smirked. “Am I talking to you?” He asked. “Cut your ears off please. Don’t eavesdrop on Hana and me.” He told him. Louis glared even more. “How about I cut your tongue out?” He beamed. Zian raised his brow. “As if you can.” He told him. “What? You think I can’t cut your tongue out?” Louis spat. Zian smirked. “As if you can take Hana back.” He replied and Louis was out of words. I narrowed my eyes at Zian. He was smiling in triumph. Nobody talked after Zian’s last words. Not even until we arrived at the floor of our pads. He walked me to my door and Louis looked at me. I know he did. I saw him in my peripheral view. “You’re too confident, Woo,” Louis spoke. Zian and I looked at him. “I am already halfway to getting her back.” He finished before going inside his pad. Zian and I looked at each other. “What did he just say?” He asked me and I shrugged. ** “Yes, Mom. I’m free.” I was on the phone with Mom. “Then come with us. We have a dinner party with the investors of the company.” She told me. “It’s a good training for you so you could be a better CEO.” I nodded. “Okay, Mom. I’ll be there. What time?” I asked. “Be here at eight tonight.” She replied. “Okay, Mom. See you.” Then I hung up. I sighed and looked at the clock. It’s four in the afternoon. I have a lot of time to get ready. And perhaps, it’s just a dinner. I don’t have to overwork myself. I walked to my wardrobe and looked for something to wear when my phone vibrated. From: Louis Fck-cual Open your door. I narrowed my eyes on the message. What is he up to again? I rolled my eyes, ignoring the message and continued to look for a dress to wear. But then my door bell was ringing continuous, suddenly. Who the hell is ringing the doorbell so many times?! I walked to the door and opened it only to see L.Joe standing there. “I told you to open the door nicely, but you didn’t listen to me.” He told me then he went inside. I scoffed at him. “Who told you to get inside?” I asked him as I watched him walk his way inside my pad. I still closed the door. He looked around and sat on the couch, turned the TV on. I followed him and looked down on him while my hands are on my waist. He looked up to me and grinned. “I told you, I’m halfway to getting you back.” He told me. I sighed and rolled my eyes. “How many times do I have to tell you that I don’t want it back?!” I exasperated. Why is he so stubborn?! “I’m not asking for your permission so you have no say in this. I want you back. You can’t do anything about it.” He told me then looked into the TV. I took a deep breath. “I thought you needed some time?” I asked him. “I thought you were confused?” He stood up and faced me. Really, really close. “Do I look like I’m confused to you?” He asked me as his eyes pierced through mine. His hand caressed my cheek. And at that instant, I felt the time stopping again. Like I’m staring at him but I don’t know what’s happening because he’s the only one moving. He’s the only one who knows about the situation. “What the hell would I do with time when every time I see you with someone else makes me want to bury him alive?” He asked me. “The moment I saw Woo’s hand interlaced with yours, I knew it.” He looked at me. “I’m still yours, Hana. You still control my emotions. You still control my mood.” “No, Louis-“ “Sssh.” He placed his index finger on my lips. “I understand you and your thing with Woo now. You didn’t have closure because you left. That’s what you needed. You’re just blinded by the fact that he waited for you and still want you after all these years.” I blinked at him. To where is this discussion going? “But, Hana,” He paused. “I waited for you too.” He told me. “I also waited for you to come back again. I waited for this moment that I could finally hold you into my arms because I never had gotten to do that five years ago.” “But there’s Nicole.” I told him. “If you’ve waited for me, why is there another girl in between us again?” I asked. Louis sighed. “You told me she gave you life again. You told me she made you whole again. That she loved you when you’re in your worst.” I continued but this time, my tears are threatening to fall again. Damn it! Why am I such a cry baby? “There is this part of me that wants you back, Louis. Even when you told me to not complicate your relationship, I still have this part of me that wants you back.” I sobbed. “But when you told me those things about Nicole, I felt my world falling apart. I told you destiny was not on our side. But the truth is, I don’t deserve you anymore. You’ve gone through a lot because of me and I don’t think I deserve to be with you again.” “Hana-“ “You told me you’re confused about your feelings.” I swallowed. “You know what I felt back then?” I asked him. “I lost. I lost, Louis Pascual. That time, I know that I’ve lost you to another woman.” I cried. “Because the moment I left you, I gave her the right to enter your life. I gave you the right to love somebody else.” “I was so ashamed of myself because I even got the guts to tell you that I missed you. But in fact, I don’t have the right. I left you. You’re someone else’s now.” “Hana, please-“ “And you know the funniest thing?” I chuckled weakly. “That after all these things, I still have the same pain when I see you with her. I still have the same pain when you hold her hand. I still have the same pain when you’re smiling at her.” I wiped my tears. “Maybe you’re right. Maybe I still love you.” He looked at me. “But do I have the right to love you?” I asked him. “I don’t. Because I don’t deserve you. You’ve been through a lot to be mine. I told you we were never meant to be. Never were. Never will.” “You know that I am badass.” He told me. What’s going into his mind, really? “You tell me we were never meant to be? I’ll prove you wrong. You said destiny made us fall out of place.” He looked into me. “But you’ve forgotten that destiny brought us together. We haven’t gotten engaged for nothing, Hana. There was a reason for that engagement. And it was for us to fall for each other.” Then his lips met mine. Again.
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