More than a memory

Chapter 17

The decision to make

Jeremy

Roxanne walked into her bedroom with Ahana. She didn't say to us what she decided and the waiting was making me go insane. I turned to Rico. At least I needed to know what the hell happened with me.

- Rico, what happened? - he shivered like I've just woke him up from a dream.

- Honestly, I don't know. Ahana told me to stay here while Clarissa took Roxy away but apart from that, I don't remember anything. I groaned im frustration.

- Why is she being so secretive?! I have to know why I felt that way!

- What did you feel? - Clarissa asked.

- I felt the same pain as I felt when Roxanne died. I saw her falling to her death. I felt anger and thirsty for revenge. I wanted to cry, destroy, I wanted to see the world burn. - Rico and Clarissa took a step back. My friend looked at me terrified.

- Jeremy... You just described how you acted when Roxy died and after Ahana brought her back.

- What are you talking about? I just left the Pack. - Rico sighed.

- Yeah, that is what we agreed with Ahana for you to remember. - I felt my eyes opening wide.

- Please forgive us, you were going insane and hurting the people around you. - Clarissa said.

- No. - I mumbled and Rico pat my shoulder.

- Dude, you saw Nicolas everywhere. Each time we trained you almost killed someone. Your powers got so strong that even your father couldn't hold you back anymore.

- We had to lock you with silver chains but you broke them Jeremy. We even gave you huge doses of wolfsbane, but instead of weakening your body got used to it in days.

- I don't remember any of this. - I said and sat down.

- That was when we called Atlas, Noelle and Ahana. Your mother alone couldn't hold you back anymore. Even her magic wasn't enough. - Rico said and I looked at Clarissa.

- What else did I do? - her eyes filled with tears.

- You almost dug out Keith from his grave. You wanted him to help you save Roxanne. - I couldn't believe what I was hearing. Keith became a close friend of mine. The thought that I almost desecrated his grave made my stomach upset and I gasped for air.

- Maybe it would be the best if we shut up now. - Clarissa said. I shook my head and took a deep breath to calm my stomach.

- Keep going. I need to know.

- Are you sure? - Rico asked.

- Yes. - he smiled a bit, but it wasn't a happy smile at all.

- Atlas was the only one who was able to restraint you. He literally had to break all your bones, your father couldn't handle seeing you in so much pain. Your mother was crying during the whole process. Ahana erased your memories. After that, your mother, Ahana and Noelle went against the laws of nature and brought back Roxanne from death. In result of that, for an unknown time, your mother lost her power as a punishment. Noelle couldn't see Atlas for a year and Ahana became mortal for the same time. She was furious when you decided to make Roxanne forget about you. The year passed, they served their punishments and we are here now. - I didn't know what to say. All my family sacrificed so much for me and I didn't even know about it.

- Thank you for telling me about this. I'll thank Ahana, my mom, dad and everyone for what they've done. - I walked and hugged both of my friends the way I should've done at the moment I stepped in Roxanne's door.

- You can't even imagine how grateful I am. - they hugged me back and I heard Clarissa sobbing while she said.

- We are family, this was the least we could do.

- Didn't the Goddess punish you too? - I asked them and Clarissa started to cry. Rico hugged her and said in a low, sorrowful voice.

- She did. We can't have a child for our own. - my jaw dropped. I became angry and stormed out of the balcony. I shouted at the sky.

- THEY DID NOTHING! WHY DID YOU DO THAT TO THEM?! - Rico pulled me back from the balcony and my tear fall. I cried like a child.

- I'll never forgive myself for this. I'm so sorry guys, I wish I could just turn back time. Things would be so different!

- How so? - Rico asked.

- I'd never fall for Roxanne. I'd avoid her like a plague if I could turn back time. - Clarissa frowned at me.

- That is the stupidest thing I've ever heard.

- You could not control the mate bond Jeremy. Even if you could go back time.

- Then, I'd die right after Roxanne did. Instead of becoming a monster. - Rico spalled me so hard that my ears rang. For some miraculous reason my jaw didn't break.

- Stop this s**t right now! - he growled at me with Alpha authority but I growled back. Clarissa's eyes widened and jumped between me and Rico. Rico stopped growling and looked genuinely surprised.

- Jeremy.. What the f**k was that? - I stopped when I noticed what I was doing.

- I don't know.

- How did you do that!? - he asked and Clarissa pulled my t-shirt.

- Try to talk to Ulric! Maybe he is back! - she suggested. I tried but nothing. Right when I gave up trying the bedroom door opened and Roxanne walked out with Ahana by her side.

- Roxy! How are you? - Clarissa asked and tried to hug her bit Roxanne put her hand between them.

-I'm okay.

- Do you remember? - Rico asked and Roxanne looked at me.

- You kept so many secrets from me for years. - I looked at the floor and waited for the rest of the scolding. I tried to prepare my heart for her rejection. I expected shouting, crying, cursing but Roxanne just smiled.

- Neither of you will ever know if I remember or not. This is my payback. - she turned to Ahana and thanked her.

- It is time for me to go. - Ahana said and I accompanied her to the door. Before she left I hugged my cousin and thanked her for everything she and her family did and sacrificed for me. She pat my head just like she did when I was a pup and said.

- That's what a family is for Jeremy. Just don't screw up this time. - she walked out of the door and I asked before she disappeared.

- Do you mean that Roxanne's memories are back? - she shrugged and gave me a mocking smile.

- Only she knows. Bye Jeremy! - I walked back to the living room where Clarissa and Rico were just explaining to Roxanne that they are werewolves and what Ahana is. I took a seat in front of Roxanne and just listened to their conversation. She avoided to look at me and with every minute I died a little. This was what I was afraid of. She ignored me, and she was angry. I don't know how, but I felt her anger and sadness. Does this mean that I lost her forever?