The boy that never loves me back

chapter 1 The First Time I Saw Him The classroom was louder that day than it had ever been before. Chairs scraped against the floor, books were opened halfway, and whispered gossip moved from mouth to mouth like wildfire. But somehow, in the middle of all that noise, the silence around him felt louder than everything else. He didn’t smile. He didn’t greet anyone. He just walked in like he already belonged to a world that didn’t want him. The teacher paused for a moment—just a small pause—but I noticed it. Even she was surprised. “Class… we have a new student,” she finally said, adjusting her glasses. “He will be joining us from today.” He stood near the board, hands in his hoodie pocket, eyes scanning the room like he was looking for something… or trying to avoid something. Then his eyes stopped. On me. I froze. It wasn’t a long look. Just a second. Maybe less. But something strange happened in that moment—like the air in my lungs forgot how to leave my body properly. I quickly looked away, pretending to arrange my books, pretending I didn’t feel anything. But my heart was already betraying me. “Sit at the back,” the teacher pointed. And just like that, he walked past the rows. Each step he took sounded normal to everyone else. But to me, it felt like something was approaching that I didn’t have a name for yet. He sat two rows behind me. Close enough that I could feel his presence. Far enough that I couldn’t understand him. The lesson continued. Words on the board. Notes. Instructions. Everything blurred. Because now I was aware of one thing only— He was behind me. And for some reason, that was enough to make my thoughts stop behaving normally. When the bell finally rang, the classroom exploded back into life. Laughter. Chairs moving. Bags zipping. But I stayed still for a second too long. I don’t know why. Maybe I was waiting for something. Maybe I was hoping for something I didn’t understand. Then I stood up. That’s when it happened. My notebook slipped from my hand and fell to the floor. Before I could bend down— A hand picked it up. His hand. I looked up slowly. And there he was, standing just behind me. Closer than before. His eyes were calm, but distant, like someone who had seen too much for his age. “You dropped this,” he said. His voice wasn’t loud. But it stayed in my head like it had always belonged there. I took the notebook from him, our fingers barely touching. “Th-thank you,” I managed to say, hating how weak my voice sounded. He nodded once. No smile. No extra words. Just silence again. But this silence… felt different. He turned to leave. And that should have been the end of it. It should have been just a small moment in an ordinary school day. But as I watched him walk away, something inside me whispered a dangerous thought— This boy is not ordinary. And worse… He is going to change everything. I sat back down slowly, my fingers still holding the edge of my notebook tighter than necessary. Outside the window, the sun was bright. But somehow, the room didn’t feel bright anymore. It felt like the beginning of something I could never walk away from. And I didn’t even know his name yet.