The shy's girl crush

Chapter fifteen - New hobby

Loren's POV:

For the past week, Dylan and I have been together every day. I started getting calmer around him. Sometimes, I am still nervous. I try not to show it. I know he likes this Loren more than the shy one. It's not easy for me. I'll do it for him. Also, I enjoy the time we spend together. There was a time when I wanted him to get distant from me. Luckily, this never happened. That would be a big mistake on my side. The thing is that he is too nice to me. I feel like I don't deserve this. I have to say that my parents are happy. I mean, mostly that I'm going outside so often. If I have to tell the truth, I do it because I don't want him to come home. I have nothing to hide. The thing is that my house is where I feel safe. The other reason is that the sketchbook is here. I lock it, but sometimes I leave it on the bed. I can't let him see this. Otherwise, he will think that I'm obsessed with him. It's not true, or at least not at all. I wonder when I will be brave enough to tell him everything. I'm trying to look calm. Whenever we go outside, I feel nervous. Being around people makes me feel different. Sometimes, I am anxious. Maybe it's not that serious, but it's not something I like. Luckily, Dylan is with me all the time. That's why I do all of this because of him. I feel more comfortable using FaceTime than doing the same thing in person. I can use him to help me with that. For some reason, I like being alone. I mean, it's not that bad to spend some time with yourself. Well, there is a difference between being alone and being lonely. I prefer the first thing. If I don't do anything, the second thing might be true for me. I need to work on myself, but I don't know how. I hope that therapy can help me. I was thinking about it for a while.

I came home from school half an hour ago. This time, Alice wanted to be with me. First, we'll finish our homework and lessons. Some teachers weren't in the mood today. I understand if they have personal drama, but why do they get mad at us? We have no idea what is going on with their lives. Also, we don't care. I have no problem with having more schoolwork. Let's say that some students complained about it today. The best solution is to keep it quiet. Otherwise, teachers get angry and might examine you quickly.

After two hours, Alice and I finished everything. I won't lie that I have missed studying with her. Doing it with Dylan is not bad, but I still prefer her. After all, we are best friends. Most of the time, we use this as an excuse to talk. In school, we don't have much time. The other thing is that there are many people. I don't want any of them to hear our conversation. Mostly, I mean Christina. I know what she is capable of, and I want to stay away from her. Trouble is the last thing I want to get in.

- What will you do for the rest of the day? - Alice asked

- I want to go to the gym.

- What? Tell me you are joking.

- No, I'm not. What's wrong with that? You can come with me if you want.

- It's enough that I'm sweating in PE. I won't do this to myself.

- It's your decision.

- Can I know why you want to go? Wait, I get it. Dylan is going.

- No. I don't know if Dylan goes to the gym.

- He does. How else do you think he is in this shape?

- Maybe, but I have no idea where he goes. There is one close to my house. I'll go there.

- Ok, but why?

- Because I want a distraction. Otherwise, I will study the whole day. It's not that bad, but I want to do something else. I would love it if you could come with me.

- No way. I am not doing this.

- Ok, I won't pressure you.

- Call me when you finish taking your shower.

- What?

- After the gym, you need a shower. I won't let you close to me, sweating. We are best friends, and I love you, but I can't do it.

- It's ok. I know what to do.

- When will you go?

- I was thinking after an hour.

- Ok, then. I will call Jackson.

- What is going on between you two?

- Nothing.

- Are you sure?

- Yes. I won't deny a date with this boy, but he probably doesn't want it.

- You can ask him.

- No way. Boys always make the first move.

- Why? You can do it too.

- And to look like a desperate i***t? That won't happen.

- You are thinking much.

- Said the girl who can't talk with her crush.

- Hey! At least I am trying.

- You keep trying for weeks. I don't see any results. Dylan didn't ask you out.

- As much as I want that, it's better if it never happens.

- Why?

- Personal reasons.

- Loren, you can't escape from life. Things like that happen.

- I can avoid them.

- Whatever. Go and get ready. I'll leave you for now. Call me later.

- Ok, bye, Alice.

- Bye, Loren. - my best friend said and left

I went to get ready and walked out. This gym center offers membership cards. Well, I am here for the first time. That's why I won't buy one. Also, I'm not sure how long I will be here. First, I decided to warm my legs. I went on the treadmill. I started with walking. Later I increased the speed a bit to start running. It's not that bad. For a person who doesn't exercise, that's a lot harder. I need to get used to this. Later, I lifted five kilograms of weight on each hand for twenty minutes. Honestly, I don't know what I am supposed to do here. I have never trained seriously. It would've been easier if someone had told me what to do. Of course, I tried the bicycle. Up to now, that is what I have enjoyed the most. Last, I took one heavy ball and did squats with it. That was a mistake. I fell quickly. Luckily, no one saw it. That is for today. I don't want to do anything else.

When I finished there, I went home for a shower. I need to start bringing deodorant with me. I don't smell that bad, but it's not something I like. To my surprise, my dad was at home. I looked at my phone and saw that it was 5 pm. Maybe my mom is late.

- Hey, dad. How was your day?

- It was good, thank you.

- Isn't mom with you?

- No, she had some work to do. Do you need her?

- No, I'm only asking.

- I'm glad you started going out more often. I don't know when I saw you in a sports suit for the last time.

- Dad, I have PE twice a week.

- Oh, yeah.

- How can you forget that?

- Well, I have other work to do. You're not the only thing in my head.

- Let's say that I believe you.

- Can I know where you have been?

- Oh, I have been to the gym. I decided to turn this into my new hobby. Do you like it?

- I have to say that I'm surprised.

- Why? That way, I will stop studying so much and will distract myself.

- I'm glad you're doing something positive.

- It takes me some time to decide what I want to do.

- I like that you're going outside. That's it.

- I don't know how long I can keep doing this, but I will try my best.

- Keep going if you want to have any results.

- Dad, I'm not doing it because I want to be slim. I told you I wanted to distract myself.

- Whatever you do, stay on the right way.

- I don't think I will ever get away from it.

- By the way, where is the necklace that you had?

- Oh, I found out who it belongs to. I returned it.

- You went to the person and returned it?

- What? No, I sent it to the mail. There is no way that I will talk with him in person.

- Loren, you know that you have to talk with people. You have to socialize more if you want to have more friends.

- I have friends.

- Alice doesn't count. She has been your friend since you came to this high school.

- So?

- I don't want you to be lonely. Both with your mom want you to be happy.

- I am. Maybe not like you and mom, but I am happy.

- Ok, I won't argue with you.

- Do you want us to make dinner? Mom will be happy.

- Why not? I will leave the menu to you.

- Deal.

Dad and I made pasta and salad. Mom was still outside. Maybe she has a meeting. I won't call her. I covered the bowl with pasta so it could be warm. Dad set the table. Everything was ready. What has left was for my mom to come home. I went to take a shower. Let's say that I forgot to do it when I came home. Well, I started talking with dad. Honestly, I enjoy our conversations. When I was ready, I walked back to the kitchen. Mom was already home. I don't know where the flowers came from, but I know who put them here.

- I have to be gone more often.

- Finally, you are at home. - I said and hugged mom

- Yes. I had a long meeting. I'm sorry.

- It's ok. Loren helped with dinner. You don't have to do anything.

- I see. Thank you. I needed this. Otherwise, we would've eaten late.

- Don't get used to this. - I said, and my mom chuckled

- I know. Have you been training?

- Maybe. Why?

- You never such an outfit.

- What is wrong with it? Seriously?

- I'm only saying. You look good.

- Thanks. Can we eat now? I'm getting hungry.

- Did the exercise take all your energy? - dad asked, laughing

- No, but I didn't eat much for lunch.

- Why?

- I wasn't hungry back then.

- You can sit down. Loren and I will put everything. - dad said

- Thank you.

Dad and I put everything on the table and sat down. I like it when my mom is happy. I know she works a lot and needs some rest. That's why she and my dad need to spend more time together. Maybe they can go somewhere for the weekend. I will stay with Alice. I'm sure she won't mind. After all, it's only two days.

- Dad?

- Yes.

- Why don't you take mom somewhere for the weekend? She needs a rest.

- So you can turn the house upside down. - dad said, chuckling

- I'm serious. If you do it, I will stay with Alice.

- Look, I can't plan a trip for two days.

- You can book a hotel in town. I mean, you don't have to travel much.

- I don't know.

- Honey, leave this to me. Your dad won't do anything.

- Hey, that's not true.

- For our wedding, he wanted a green cake.

- Why? - I asked

- Because it looked nice in the picture. - dad said

- I had no problem with that, but our parents said no.

- Now I want a green cake.

- Tell me when you want it, and I will give it to you. - dad said

- Tomorrow, at 10 am. - I said, chuckling

- Yeah, I can't do that. - dad said, laughing

- I know. That's why I said it. So, about the vacation. I am serious. It doesn't have to be this weekend. I know during the week, both of you are busy.

- True. It's not a bad idea. We'll think about it.

- I don't need to think. My bags are ready. - mom said

- What? When?

- I am always ready for a trip. - my mom said, chuckling

- Life with two girls is not easy.

- You should've been careful eighteen years ago. - I said

- I know.

After dinner, my parents went into the living room for a movie. I walked into my room to call Alice. On the third call, she picked up. Who knows what she has been doing? It's better if I don't know.

- Hey.

- Hello. How was your workout? - my best friend asked, chuckling

- It was good. I liked it. I might start doing it every day.

- You are crazy.

- Me or you?

- Loren, there are many things you can do. Why don't you fill out the Dylan sketchbook?

- I do that as well.

- I will never be able to understand you.

- You like the happy or sad Loren?

- The happy one, of course.

- Then leave me to do what I want.

- Ok, ok. Don't get mad. I am on your side.

- What happened with Jackson? Did you two go out?

- Yes, we did. Well, we only went for drinks. He was busy.

- I'm sorry.

- It's ok. At least I am doing something.

- Please, don't start.

- Don't worry. That is your problem.

- Will you ever make a move? I'm not sure if he knows that you like him.

- I don't know. He might not feel the same way.

- There is one way to find out.

- I know, but I won't do it for now.

- It's your decision.

- Did we fall for the wrong boys?

- Why? Both of them are good to us.

- Yeah, but when it comes to a date, we change and start thinking.

- You know why I act this way. I can't talk to him in person. I mean, not the same way when I text him or use FaceTime.

- I'm ok with talking, but I don't know what to tell him. Am I boring?

- No. Of course not. You are funny.

- I don't feel this way.

- You are the funniest person I know. The one who should think low of herself is me.

- You are a pro at this. - Alice said, chuckling

- Ok, I will go to bed.

- It's early.

- I know, but I'm tired. We'll talk tomorrow.

- Ok, goodnight and sweet dreams.

- Thanks. To you too. - I said and ended the call

I played with my phone for a while and later fell asleep. I need a good sleeping schedule if I want good results. I don't know how people do it all the time. I got tired after the first day. Maybe I need to search for workouts online. There are many apps about it. Well, there is enough time for that. After all, school always comes first. I will probably end up quitting this. I haven't trained so much, and it's hard for me. I don't know how long I will be able to do this. No matter what happens, I have to distract myself with something. Otherwise, all my thoughts come at once. I hope I'll find something that entertains me.