Jack Is A Jackass
KIARA FALLS
~~
“I’m Kiara Falls,” I uttered my name before realizing that I was more than just plain Kiara Falls now.
My life has changed and as much as I wanted to claim that it happened overnight, it didn't. it took years of dedication to be standing on the spot I have spent the past few years of college eyeing.
I cleared my throat, giving introducing myself another try, “I am Professor Falls. I will be your Biology Professor.”
Curious young eyes of newly admitted bright scientific minds of New Crest State Science College stared back at me; most of them at least. I could hear their unspoken questions but I waited for one of them to ask because I knew that would happen.
“How are you a Professor? You appear young.” A brunette who sort of reminded me of myself, queried, adjusting her glasses.
I smiled at her, choosing my words carefully, “I became a Professor by focusing on my studies. Do you perhaps have something against young professors?”
“No, Professor Falls.” The brunette answered quickly, apologizing as well.
“Any more questions?”
I threw a question to my class of almost a hundred students; ninety-eight to be precise. It was a pity that the science world never got as much attention as the artistic world but we were doing just fine. I spent the next few minutes answering questions, both logical and utterly stupid questions but I didn't mind. I have prepared my mind for these questions.
A female student in the middle row of the bright lecture theater raised her hand. I nodded, “Ask away, please.”
“Actually, I don’t have any questions. I intend to tell you that you are an inspiration to me. It’s an honor to learn from you, Professor Falls. My name is Maya.” She voiced enthusiastically.
My brows furrowed as it was hard to decipher if she was buttering me up or being honest, either way, I responded, “Thank you, Maya.” Turning to the rest of the class, I added, “If you have any more questions about me, kindly search about me on the web. You will get more than enough answers.”
Some of my students giggled, assuming that I was bluffing but I wasn’t.
Even when I was plain Kiara Falls, I was a big deal, especially in this college. I shouldn't have been surprised when I got the offer to work here after I graduated earlier this year but I still spent a week celebrating with my sweet and smart-ass boyfriend, Dave Cohen–
Okay, stop there Kiara. Focus!
I picked my lecture tab on the fancy glass table, ready to kill my first day as a Professor and the first topic on the semester’s curriculum but to my surprise, my students suddenly burst into loud fits of laughter, crackling like they have heard a joke.
“Anything funny?” I questioned but they didn't seem to hear my voice amidst their laughter. “There better be,” I grumbled, descending from the high podium and walking straight into the space between the students' seat rows.
That was when I heard it and it wasn’t something funny.
It was the sound of a woman moaning in pleasure.
You have got to be kidding me!
“Hey, you. You over there.” I snapped, forgetting that I was supposed to be the composed twenty-three-year-old biology Professor. “What do you think you are doing?”
I wasn’t sure which one of the female students was making that sound yet I acted like I already found her, hoping to outsmart whoever was it that was ruining my first day at work. I listened to the bloody sound and followed it, thinking of a thousand ways to punish the female student when I found her.
But alas! The sound led me to an oblivious male student whose eyes were glued to the screen of his cell phone where an explicit video of a young woman was in full display.
Saying I was livid would be an understatement yet I held my tongue as I knocked the table in front of the crazy guy, “What do you think you are doing?”
“Minding my business, Prof. I would have lectured you on how to do that but I'm quite occupied.” Those words rolled out of his mouth with no single ounce of remorse.
He didn't even look at me.
“Excuse you?” I snapped, unable to believe his effrontery. “Who do you think you are to constitute nonsense in my lecture theater!”
Why can't everything be perfect? Why must I deal with this i***t today of all day?
Indifferently, he stated still not looking at me even though his attitude had seized the attention of every other student, “The name is Jack. May I continue sèx chatting with my beautiful girlfriend, Professor?”
“So Jack is a Jackàss.” I blurted loudly, causing the class to roar with laughter.
I smiled. I shouldn't admit this as a professor but I did enjoy the response from the other students. I felt like I was winning.
Mr. Jackàss on the other hand, cut his face to me, giving me a proper look for the first time, “Excuse you?”
For a minute there, my breath hitched. He might be a jackàss but he was a beautiful one. His striking green eyes dilated and his face hardened as he asked firmly, “What did you just call me?”
I had to remind myself that I was the professor in the room, not him.
“Did I pronounce it wrong? Would you have preferred J.E.R.K to jackàss?” I spelled out the word 'jèrk' to him, determined to use him as a scapegoat regardless of his captivating features.
“When you are in my lecture theater, you obey the rules.” I continued, holding his gaze. “If you can't be a decent student, stay away from my class because I won't tolerate any disrespect and misconduct from any of you.”
To further emphasize my point, I stretched my hand and demanded, “Give your cell to me, Jack. I will be confiscating that unto you come with your parents—”
“This is college, bro, not high school.” Green-eyed Jack raised his voice, cutting me off and rising to his feet. My eyes followed his frame as he stretched, towering over my 5’4 body. “You can't treat me like a kid. My tuition is what makes your unbearable life bearable. You get paid with my money.”
Ouch….
Those words stung, to be honest, but again, I was the professor in the room, not this incredibly tall, big, hot but completely churlish àsshöle.
Rather than let him or anyone else see that his words got to me, I retorted sharply, “Even though it isn't scientific, analysis appreciated, Jèrk.” I changed the spelling of his name not like he would notice. He was a crackhead after all.
“However, dummy, the state pays me not you. Your so-called money or should I say, your parent's money goes to giving you a good learning environment, and you—” I paused, feeling stupid for arguing like a child. “You know what, never mind. Just get out of my lecture theater.”
Jack scowled at me, showing that he was the kind of student who would do anything to fight authority.
“Leave now!” I gritted but the wall clock in the class made a musical sound that meant the class had come to an end.
Jack rolled his eyes as he grabbed his cross bag, “I was just leaving. Hopefully, that will loosen the fat stick in your fat àss.”
It was barely a whisper but I heard him.
“How dare you!” I yelled but he was already gone, heading out with other students.
When the door closed after the last student to leave, I put my hands on my head and screamed out my frustration.
“Dave was right,” I said to myself as I walked back to my table. “I might be the top graduating student but I wasn't cut for lecturing spoilt bràts.”
Recalling that I had to make a report to my supervisor— What professor has a supervisor? Well, Professor Falls does not because I wasn't good enough but because the college President needed proof of my excellence.
As if my perfect grades and certificate weren't enough!
My cell phone vibrated, indicating an incoming call from the only woman I had a love-hate relationship with. Fully aware of why she was calling me, I answered the phone, “Hi, mom—”
“Why aren't you here yet? I have been waiting to see you and—”
“You do know I have a job, right, Mom?” I cut in as I stepped into the same wide corridors I was used to. “I'm happy you found a man worth sticking with… it’s been over three months’s mom–”
“Drop the touches of sarcasm and get here as soon as possible, Kia. I have sent you the address and as I said, you will like him. He loves science like you and I really want you both to get along.” My mom said from the other side of the phone, sounding like a love-sick kitten.
“You love him don’t you?” I blurted, asking an obvious question.
My mom is a beautiful woman and she knew that which was why she had spent the past few years of her life changing men like she changed the color of her hair. She never spends three months with a man and fun fact, she always picks the richest of them.
She is what many people would call a golddigger– even I have called her that many times while growing up but she owned it until now.
“Yes, Kia. I find the one.” My mom muttered.
I couldn't stop myself from smiling because truly, I was happy for her. She wasn’t the best mom but I admire her so much but still chose not to be anything like her.
“I will be the judge of that when I meet him.” I retorted and my mom giggled. “See you soon, Mom, and I am happy for you.”
Before she could gloat about my emotional expression, I ended the call, entered my old model car, and drove to my apartment to get changed.
And while I drove through town, I thought back to Jackass. I smiled replaying his reactions in my head.
“It’s a pity the class had to end so fast…” I said with a smile.
Within a few minutes, I arrived at the old dormitory where I had been living since my third year in college. I might have become a professor but I still was a broke young woman who wouldn't accept money from her gold-digging mother.
But my life was transitioning– I just didn't know how much transitioning I was experiencing and when I did find out, too much had changed.