Destined by Desire

“Aren’t you excited?” Claudia asks, staring into my soul as I try to focus on picking my designs “I’m more of nervous than excited?” I try to keep my cool “Nervous? Lodia, you are the most talented and creative girl I know, you’ve got this” Claudia has always been a supportive best friend since high school, she has never been condescending or negative and I love her so much for that “Thank you so much Claudia” I clean invisible tears and she laughs “I’ll come see you some other time, my boss keeps calling” she says and I nod. She gets up and gives me a hug as she starts leaving “And oh, Claudia? Thank you so much for putting this company on the list, really” “There’s nothing I won’t do for you Elodia, I love you bye” she hurries out and I smile For the past 1 hour, I have been trying to pick out some of my best designs I can showcase during the charity event, I don’t think my this unpopular fashion company would’ve been noticed if not for Claudia that sees our potential. A call comes into my work phone and I hurriedly answer it “Elodia Santiago” “Get you and your team to my office now” my demanding boss Oswald Olver commands from the other line I dread working here cause of his demands and it’s not like the pay is even worth dealing with his bull s**t. I get up from my table and walk to Vanessa’s; Vanessa and I were rivals; rivals because she’s the one that is competing with me and that makes me dislike her so bad “Boss is asking to see us and the whole team” I say as I reach her desk “Okay” she rudely replies and gets up to call her team “Good morning all” I count this being the 20th time Oswald Olver has done a dramatic spin on his chair to face us “As you know, there’s a charity event going on” he announces and we nod; the best way to answer Mr Oswald “I want you to know that the event is not just a charity show. Every member of your team that wants to participate will pay a little fee to get in” he continues and I start to hear scoffs and murmurs “What if we pay this fee and at the end get no sponsors?” Charis asks and Mr Oswald turns to look at her “That’s none of my business” he snarks “But the concept of Non profit organizations is to help out little organizations, they didn’t ask for any fee” Charis the brave fights on. Love that we have a voice for all “The organization gave an opportunity to me to give you all a chance and you all qualify for this opportunity after paying the fee” Mr Oswald goes on “But the participants and donors already pay a fee to attend or sponsor the event” Charis goes on “Leave my office” Mr Oswald commands “All of you, the fee will be communicated through your emails” Everyone leaves the room upset and mumbling among themselves, I wonder how a boss loves putting up with such a toxic environment for workers I go back to pick my designs, I try to create a mental picture of close friends I can pick to model for me; these are the issues, I barely have friends. “Okay Clara” I start listing people I could think of in my head, Clara is a fellow fashion designer, she earlier asked me to model for her and so I’m sure she can do same for me “this isn’t good” I almost start crying. If I had funds, I could pay models of course that wouldn’t be a problem but I don’t so maybe Clara and I could enter the runway, but that’s such a poor performance I slap my self a little on the face “Relax, the point is to pass down a message, to show off my designs, I’ve got this” **** ”200 dollars?” I looked at the email I just received on my laptop, horror struck. The boss is such a gold digger, cause why is he digging gold from us for a charity event. f*****g charity. Ugh I pick up my phone and go to my savings account, I look at a rough 250 dollars sitting in the account and I frown “You have got to be kidding me” I let out a little scream What’s the guarantee I’m going to get a sponsor at that event? What if I can’t raise money back, I start panicking, I hate not having money, it puts me in a uncomfortable situation and I need to change that for my self, for my life, for my family I pick up my phone to call Charis and she immediately picks up “Did you take a look at your email?” I ask “I did and I think the boss deserves death cause what is this about?” She complains, just what I was looking for, needed someone to fight for that fee to be terminated “What are we gonna do?” I ask, all my hope lying on her next response “I don’t know if there’s anything we can do Elodia. It seems even as if Mr. Oswald has been counting my voice outs in his head and would soon blow a horn as my last chance. Maybe we should just pay the fee” she sighs and all my hope drops, Charis the great is sinking cause of that big beast? “I don’t necessarily know if I can use up the money I have to pay for this fee cause what if I don’t end up getting sponsors?” I let my thoughts out “No way you think you won’t get sponsors. Elodia come on, I think you’re the most talented fashion designer I know of in that company and I promise you the only reason you’ve not blown up is cause Mr. Oswald is keeping you in the shadows, he’s keeping all of us in the shadows” she said, she sounded so sincere and I do know Charis for her bluntness and sincerity “If you want to take my advice Elodia, I think you should attend the event, show off your designs and eat up that stage” she finishes and I can’t help but let out a little tear, I was so emotional “Thank you so much Charis, I feel so much better and I definitely do not regret calling you” “Anytime Elodia” she says and ends the call. That was enough motivation for me to get up and draft a schedule. I get up and go to my wardrobe where I keep some of my already made designs, I always made sure to hold on to a piece of them anytime I submit the designs to Mr. Oswald. I lowkey feel my designs get more credit than what I get from them but what do I know? My self esteem level deteriorates each day I wake up and go to work for that beast, makes me want to give up on my passion, I’ve been on the verge of quitting for the past few months I pick up my computer and start looking for designs I can work out, my eyes wander off to some designs and I think I suddenly know my three best picks to show off at the event, may the sponsors have great taste, so help me God. I get to my industrial machine, get my materials and start working on my designs, I never really start designing without a color or material in mind, just looking at the undone piece of fabric makes me visualize so many great things with it and that’s one of the things I love the most about my self. I’m undeniably creative.