Feelings Under Construction

Me? Dancing and stripping in a viral video? Stop it, Tasha. You're scaring me!" Maya's chest sank, hot sweat already dripping through her perfectly polished office shirt. "I wouldn't joke about something like this Maya, Look." Tasha, held her phone out, her grey eyes fixed sternly on Maya. "No, no, I don't want to. It can't be true." She shook her head. "Just tell me it's some stupid prank." "It's not," Tasha said, pushing the phone forward to Maya, her voice softer now "It's all over the internet. Everyone's talking about it, take a look!” Maya's chest dropped, she moved forward, slowly taking the phone from Natasha. Her fingers fumbled as she stared at the screen. The video started playing. It was Maya on a stage, or maybe just a table, at the company party, Drunk. her dress was gone, wearing only her half cut bra and pants. Her dark brown flowy hair, usually well-groomed, now tangled and messy as she was swaying it left to right. People were cheering her on and flashing lights. "Oh my God!" Maya gasped, her words stuck in her throat, "This isn't… This can't be real." Her eyes darted back to the screen. "This can’t be me… No, this isn’t me. I don’t dance like that. I don’t act like that. What was I doing up there?!" She looked up at Natasha, her eyes wide with disbelief. "Why? Why is this on the internet? Tasha, why?" Her voice cracked and her hands trembled. "Why was no one stopping me, Tasha? They were laughing and cheering like I was some damn slut. Tasha crossed her arms, "You tell me, girl. I wasn't at that party with you. Remember? I had that family thing I told you I needed to attend." She paused. Maya's feet almost slipped as she firmly held on to her office glass table. "Why are you acting so surprised Maya? You don't remember doing… any of this yesternight?" Maya shut her eyes tight. "No! Nothing. I remember… I remember getting there. And then… I was just so hurt." She opened her eyes, a fresh wave of despair washing over her. "I remember taking shots after shots, And... and his face… The new hire, I was telling him stuff about Jared cheating on me, he looked at me like he actually saw me, like he understood my pain. I remember sitting on his lap, telling him everything. All my stupid worries. And then… nothing. After that? Everything is blank. Tasha’s eyebrows shot up. "Wait. The new hire? Gray? The hot, sexy dude they called the party for?" Maya nodded, her head feeling heavy. "Yes. Him. I think so. I don't know. Everything's just… a blur. I didn’t just lose control. I lost time. Hours. My body felt heavy this morning, I felt like I’d been buried and dug up.” Tasha quickly leaned closer. "Hold on. You said Jared cheated? Wait, is that why you didn't take my calls last night?" Maya’s eyes burned, "Yes, Tasha, He really did." She responded, trying to hold back tears. "With her. With Delilah." Tasha scoffed, a hard, sharp sound. "Come on, Maya. I warned you about this. Didn't I tell you that that snake was trouble? Didn't I tell you that girl was gonna slither back into his bed the moment she saw him? Jared had one job, not to be trash. And even that was too hard for him." "But he said… he told me there was nothing going on," Maya sobbed, burying her face in her hands. “I'm so stupid!” "Delilah left him three years ago to chase her modeling career. I loved him, Tasha. I loved him even when he was still heartbroken." Her voice cracked. "I went to his office penthouse and I saw him screwing Delilah, he was really screwing her. He didn't even try to hide it. "I threw his ring at him." She sniffed. “But then I went home, hoping he'd come back or apologize or say he was sorry." She said, then a painful pause. "But he never came home. Not even a call or a text. Nothing." Her shoulders slumped. "So I just… I decided to go to the party. Just to feel something, anything. And now this strange clip is being passed around the internet like a meme, I'm so ruined Tasha." She lifted her head, her brown eyes used to be full of life now bloodshot and filled with tears "I don't even know how I got home last night. I just… woke up. And Jared was lying next to me. He was still fully dressed from yesterday, and he smelled of her. He smelled of a scent that wasn't mine, and it wasn't his either. He just smelled like her." Her voice dropped to a whisper and her shoulders slumped. “Umm… from what I heard, Gray tried to stop you from climbing that table but you persisted, and yea they said he was the one that drove you home.” Tasha added. "I don't know, Tasha. I'm just… I'm just so done right now. So utterly done." She said, shaking her head. Tasha chewed on her lip, watching Maya with a fierce protectiveness. "That bastard, that Delilah, she's a piece of work. The girl didn’t steal your man, Maya. He walked out and handed himself over to her, like a Black Friday discount!" A sudden thought cut through Maya's silence. She sat up straighter. "Wait. Where is the new guy? Did he come today?" “Gray?” Tasha shook her head. "No, girl. Today's Saturday. He won't be here until Monday. The party was just an early welcome thing for him. Maya slumped again, the crushing weight of the video returning. She picked up the phone Tasha had brought, scrolling through the comments. Each word she read stabbed her deeply. “Isn’t this Maya from Everhart Rides company? Yikes.” “You can’t wife a girl like this.” “She moves like she does this on weekends lol.” “This one's for the streets, (trashbin emoji)” “They are really killing me in the comments Tasha,” Maya said, her voice choking her, her face swaying sideways in despair. "Don’t read those.” Tasha replied, grabbing the phone from Maya. “Whoever posted that video better pray I never find them because I got time today.” Tasha said, desperately scrolling and searching through the phone. "How do I stop this thing from circulating?" Maya whispered, her voice barely audible. "How do I stop it, Tasha? How do I make it go away? My image, my reputation, what would Jared think if he sees this, everything is ruined. I can't even look at myself." She said, looking up at Tasha, desperate tears welling up her eyes. "We need to find who posted it, or contact the channels. Get them to remove it. Tasha replied, her expression grim. But, honestly Maya? How did you end up in those channels? Who the hell filmed you like that and put it out there? This isn't just bad luck, someone did this." Maya threw her hands up, her voice rising in a desperate plea. "I don't know! I just don't know how it got like this! This is a nightmare, Tasha, I am ruined!” You ain’t ruined, Maya. You just went viral. Beyoncé got cheated on too, and she made an album, remember? Come on, Ain’t no man worth this much damage." A sharp ringtone suddenly shattered the silence. Maya jolted, It was her phone “No way! Take, it's Jared,” Tasha said, her eyeballs rolling, passing the phone to Maya. "Oh my God!” Maya breathed, her eyes widened with fresh dread. She slid her trembling finger across the phone screen. Jared's sharp and aggressive voice came through the speaker. “I want you back home now, don't waste a damn second!”