Tales of an African woman.

I'm Mercy. I turned 17 today and successfully passed the weeding test to the next level of my nursing career. I can't wait to get home and share this great news with my parents. They live in Ondo state, which is half a day's journey from my nursing school in Kano - if the roads are free anyways (rolls eyes). I'm super excited because I have never been away from home this long. It's been six(6) months since I left for school, but it feels like a decade, and I miss home. A month ago, I sent a postcard through my uncle to inform my mama and papa that I would be home for the holidays once I was done with my promotional exams. Tomorrow will be a long day; I have to rest (takes a deep sigh). The sound of distant rifles jolted me awake in the early morning hours before the cockcrow. Considering my school is half a mile from the military school, you'd think I'd be familiar with these early morning gunshots. But I wasn't; I didn't mind because it kept that area safe. I have two roommates, Pauline and Kemi. Pauline is from Cross-rivers state, while Kemi is from Oyo state. Our bags were packed, and we left the hostel to the bus stop, where we parted ways. The bus wasn't so conducive as that's what I could afford, but the excitement of going home overwhelmed me, that I forgot about that. I have always loved to sit by the window of a moving vehicle. The sight of nature, the breeze brushing over my face, and the volume of air entering into my nostrils feels like my face is buried in a cold room, which made every trip worth it. I shook my head and laughed and shouted home sweet home. The piercing sound of the car horns and the chattering of roadside hawkers brought me back from the dead of sleep. I started to stretch out within my passenger seat, and then I realized I had slept my way halfway through the journey. The idea that our minds shut down from the outside world while asleep is not totally a lie. I was at my designated bus stop in no time - the weather and the roads seemed to have smiled at me that day. I quickly flagged down a tricycle, popularly called Keke, and dragged my boxes into it. Although it was going to be a long ride from the bus stop to my hometown, Akure, the thought and excitement of seeing my parents and siblings made the ride more bearable. I already had a mental picture of what my arrival at home would look like, so on getting home, I tried my best to play my part - even if everything in me wanted to drop my belongings and run as fast as I could. Thankfully, I played my part. I walked briskly into the compound, ecstatic, only to find it quiet and empty. Strangely, no children were playing around. Although shocking, it didn't deter me, so I rushed into my mother's room. But nothing could prepare me for what I saw. I found her in a state I had never seen her. She looked pale, weak, and lean. All the color had drained from her cheeks. In her right hand was a white handkerchief covered with spots of blood. I stood there, shocked and frozen. I wanted to run toward her, but my legs were heavy. They seemed to have been in as much shock as I was. On seeing me, mama coughed vigorously in an attempt to welcome me. All the belongings attached to my body fell off, hitting the ground as I rushed towards my mama in shock. She seemed so happy to see me, but the question I had in my mind was, "Why wasn't she in the hospital?" I was covered up in tears as I tried to come to terms with this reality. Then, I heard footsteps behind me. It was my immediate younger sister, Idowu; she was carrying a bowl of water as she greeted and walked towards me. I almost didn't recognize her as she looked darker and thinner than usual. She hugged me tight and packed and arranged my things in the corner of the room. Right after her, my younger brothers, Kehinde and Taiye, rushed in. The twins simultaneously gave a shrill scream while running to hug me. They were wet from head to toe - they had been fetching water from the stream to fill the empty drums in the house. My sister had taken full responsibility for caring for my mum, as my father cared less. He had a 2nd wife in the neighboring compound whom he preferred to stay with because she had given him 6 male children. On the other hand, mama had 8 children - 6 girls and 2 boys. I was the 4th child. It was almost sunset. The evening sun had begun to cast long shadows on the ground. Giving the sky a warm orange tinge. As the slanting rays pierced through the room from the window, mama, sitting next to me at the edge of the room admiring the beauty of the sunset, asked me, "what does the sunset remind you of?" I looked at her, then smiled and replied to her, saying, "nothing really, I just enjoy the view." Then she tugged at me and whispered, "Sunsets are not only beautiful, but they also have so much meaning." I was a bit uncomfortable with this discussion, but I still went along with it. She looked at me sternly and said, "they remind us that change is part of life and everything has an end." I asked her "if sunset meant goodbye." She let out a hearty laugh while coughing simultaneously but didn't say anything. Then, I told her we needed to visit the primary health center tomorrow to get her drugs, if she wanted to get any better. I wasn't comfortable with the herbal medicine she was consuming. After a long discussion about why it was necessary to visit the health center, we talked about school and my new friends, and she gave me some advice. Time went by so fast, and I hadn't realized it was almost midnight. I immediately suggested we retire to our bed as I bid her goodnight. I also told her, "Sunset means a promise to be back tomorrow." There was a beam of smile on her face as she called me over, then hugged and kissed me on the forehead and told me to have a good night's rest. I smiled back at her and retired to my bed. I was Woken by the chirping of the birds right on the window pane beside my bed. Yes, right then the alarm clock rings at 6.00 am. Mesmerised by the light breeze of the morning hours compared to the other times of the day and also the best for exercising. I got dressed up on my active wear, on my way out I walked pass my mama's room to greet her and see if she was awake but she was fast asleep, covered her up properly and headed towards the compound. I did some jogging and cycling with my papa's old bicycle within the compound. The sun was already rising, casting it's golden rays on the zinc roofings of the poultry farm at the end of the compound and coloring the clouds. Nature is at its best at this heavenly hour. After exercising I dashed into the house immediately to get a broom and swept the compound, it was large compound with 4 to 5 mahogany trees at each end of the compound, causing the courtyard to be filled up with dried fallen leaves. After that, I watered the nursery bed behind the house. It's was past sunrise, and no one seems to have woken up. That's was really unusual so I went in and I discovered mama was already even awake and dusting her cover clothes. I could see the excitement in her when I walked in, I greeted and reminded her that we would be going to the hospital after she has had her breakfast. I dashed into my room and woke up the twins and got them started with the day. Idowu was no where to be found arround the house. Not until I saw smoke coming out from the hut at the backyard. It must definitely be idowu, as she was trying to light some fire. I went to join her as we talked about the event that happened in the house while I was away for 6months. I couldn't believe my ears, I wondered why my dad never paid much attention to mama's health and my elder siblings were nothing to write home about ( that's a story for another day). I bent down and joined her in blowing the heat on the coal to distribute the fire arround. We talked about college and I saw how enthusiastic she was to see the four walls of a tertiary institution. Idowu my sister was just in form 2 as at then, my younger brothers, yes the twins they hadn't even started school yet. Breakfast was served,we had boiled yam with red oil which was sauced with lot of onions, one of my favorite local delicacy. After the meal, I and mama got dressed up and headed towards the primary health centre. It was a trekkable distance from my house but due to mama's condition we had to use a tricycle. I couldn't bear the unnecessary glances given by passersby because of Mama's conditions. I live in a community were everybody knows everybody. The rumours that flies arround in this neighborhood spread like wild fire. As we head towards the hospital, I told my mum my intention to greet papa at his 2nd wife's place to inform him I was back to the village. She nodded and said I should do so but not to argue with my papa about her health. I was so curious to why she didn't want to make an issue out of that. It was a long que at the hospital. I directed Mama to the nurses desk to have her blood pressure checked and other vitals.Honestly, I wished I had brought my nursing uniform back home. Because, I would have been recognized as one of them and be given preferential treatment. Oh! Yes I know that's not right but that's the only way out of this mess ( hissing sound). Mama later joined me on the waiting desk and handed over to me a number card that was given to her by one of the nurses and written on it was the number 77. Ahhh! And they were only just two doctors in the hospital, consulting. I had to console my mum everytime she complains about the delay because I was the one who dragged her out with me. We waited for almost 3hrs I didn't even know when i dozed off. I woke up to the pungent smell of hospital disinfectant, invading my nostrils. The room was silent, apart from my heavy breathing and the beep beep sound from the Automated sphygmomanometer. Eventually the next number called was 76, I was glad it was almost our turn. Before I knew it, number 77 was called in. I gruesomely stood up, assisted my mama to stand up, as we walked into the consulting room. A young NYSC doctor was seated at the far end of the room,he wore a nice welcoming smile,he was nice and gentle. Listened to my mama complaint and did some physical examination on her. Then asked us to carry out some investigation. Some of which he explained the result would be out in 2weeks. Atleast I would still be arround then. He then prescribe some medications for us and directed us to the pharmacy. All praises to God. That the college have been paying us nursing student a token of N12000/ month and all I did was save. So out of it I was able to pay for the investigation and drugs. It made me feel so responsible. I was glad I was able to do that. Just the feeling of going to the hospital, my mum was already psychologically feeling better. We got out of the clinic and headed towards the gate of the hospital, its easier getting a tricycle here, because of the population of people trooping in and out of the hospital. So I stopped a tricycle and headed home to drop my mama. I explained to the tricycle that I would dropping off by the road side not far from our destination. When I got to my destination, I got down from the ride and bade her farewell as I watched the tricycle rider zoomed off. I turned around and headed towards my stepmother's compound. I stepped into the compound, the compound was large enough to host 100-200 people. The courtyard was cemented all through, with gravels decorated at the entrance of the main house.It was really a beautiful atmosphere and I saw why papa loves it here. I made my way up to their front door, with gravel crunching beneath my sandals. The peace and quiet of the compound overtook me as I knocked, feeling the serenity of their luxurious but simple life wash over me. Suddenly, my step brother opened the door. He is first child of my step mother. He is only 12yrs old. He greeted me shabbily and left the door hanging open for me. I entered into the sitting room, it was nothing out of the ordinary. Just a cozy room with two sofas that laid against the two of the four walls. The third wall had a TV and VCR case with many pictures and artifacts put on display. I was still admiring the living room, as for it had more than something normal. "Nurse mercy", called Mrs Agnes, my step mother. She sarcastically looked at me and laughed so hard. I couldn't tell what exactly made her hilarious.She then told me my dad would join me soon. She offered me food but I politely told her I was satisfied, and thanked her. After she left, I slowly walked arround the empty living room, staring at the glossy wooden artifacts on the wall. I was lost in admiration when I heard a voice from behind me saying "Congratulations mercy, I jolted out of shock, and turned around immediately only to discover it was my papa, he was extending a warm embrace. I went forward to embrace him. He squeezed me tightly and told me of how proud he was of me. I used to be my papa's favourite child while growing up, because I always loved to join him at the farm. I wasn't masculine in nature but I had the endurance level of a man. Due to this my Dad always wished I was a male child. But nevertheless, he never treated any different. But he wasn't in support of me as a female going to school. Because, he was worried that a repeat of what happened to my elder sisters would happen to me. They all Got pregnant out of wedlock, one after the other while in secondary school and as a result of that they were forced to drop out of school and got married out to the men who impregnated them, others whose pregnancy were denied were married to really old men. There was no wedding for them, everything was done behind close doors like an in-house occasion, it wasn't celebrated at all as it was a dirt on my father's reputation. The so called men that got them pregnant were not even fit to be referred to as in-laws or even husbands, talk more of taking up the responsibility of a father. Although, my mama always welcome them home whenever they come needing financial assistance without the knowledge of my father. Because, my father has sworn never to associate with them as his children. "Wisdom" my father called out to his first son, yes the one who opened the door shabbily. And asked him to get me a cup of water. That boy was very disrespectful, you needed to see the way he shrugged at my papa, and dragged his feet while murmuring some gibberish words to himself on his way to get me the water. I laughed inside of me, and thought to myself that my dad had become so lenient on discipline. I remembered how he use to flog us on every single occasion when we committed pardonable offences those days. Anyways, we talked about school and he promised to help me financially. I was glad but that would mean following him to the farm everyday. I wanted to bring the topic concerning Mama's health up but I didn't have any idea of how to go about it. At the long run. I decided to give it a try. So, this was how the conversation went."Ehhhhhhhm, papa one more thing I need to discuss something with you. Then he asked me to go ahead. I went ahead to tell him it was about Mama's health. Informed him how her condition has worsened over time.Although, we saw a medical officer and he ran some test on her and asked us to come over one's the result was out. I suggested to him, if he wouldn't mind following us to see the doctor on our next appointment. All Papa mentioned was how my mum doesn't listen, he had advice her to be complient on the herbal medicine. That if she was taking It accordingly she would have been better. That going to the hospital was a waste of money. I was shocked at the words coming from his mouth. Not upto a second interval, Mrs Agnes replied after, saying it's nemesis that has caught up with my mother, she even went ahead to calling her name's like "witch" and so forth.I couldn't sit down there and watch her ran abuses on my mother. I didn't know when I retaliated back by calling her "Ashawo"( meaning p********e). Immediately I realized what I said, I quickly apologized but she came walking towards me like flash of lightning and gave me a thunderous slap on my left cheek. The effect of the slap pushed me back on the sofa. I just sat down there confused as to why my papa would allow his 2nd wife comfortably insult my mama in his presence without uttering a single word. Suddenly, my papa stood up from his sit and started pacing back and forth within the room. After a while, he stopped at some point while backing me and facing the window. He asked me to leave his house. Mrs Agnes, without a blink of an eye dragged me out of the chair and threw me outside the house and locked the door right after. I was very angry but I didn't know how to channel my anger. I couldn't go home looking like this. It would break mama. I just had to find a way of bottling it up. I lifted myself from the floor, picked up my slippers and left the compound. On my way home, I met one of my friend rose, we were classmates from secondary school.I was shocked to see her carrying a baby at her back. She was the first person to recognize me out of the two of us. She shouted my name from afar. I went closer to her and we shared pleasantries and she congratulated me about my exams. I was not surprised as to how she found out. Because, news spread like wild fire in my neighborhood. We were actually going the same way. So we walked together and that's how I got to know she married immediately after graduation, she also told me alot of rumours surrounding my mother's ill health. I didn't want to believe what my ears heard. I decided to confirm from my mother herself when I got home. We soon reached my home and I bid her farewell. On arriving home, I met idowu peeling egusi seeds and singing joyfully under the mahogany tree at the end of the compound.. She called out my name and greeted me. I hailed her and walked inside the house to inform my mother that I was back, but she was fast asleep. So I picked up a bench from the sitting room and joined my sister outside. I then asked my sister if that's how she has been sleeping this days. She confirmed to me that it happens everytime she takes her herbal concoction. We started gossiping about the happenings within the village and that's how she mentioned to me about rose who had just put to bed a month ago. I related to her that I actually saw her on my way back. She informed me that rose never got married, that she got pregnant for the road side mechanic that leaves across her Aunt's house. She was sent packing from her aunt house to live with the man. I couldn't believe my ears. That's how we giggled and laughed until it was almost sunset, then we headed towards the kitchen to make supper. We had cassava flour and egusi soup for dinner. We all ate together from the same bowls; as one of the bowl contains the swallow and the other housing the soup. Only mama ate alone. It was always fun eating this way as a child while growing up. This reminded me of how our family use to be united before my papa got married to a 2nd wife. It was a memory I cherished so much. Immediately after dinner, everybody retired to their beds except for me and mama. I had a lot of questions that I needed answers too. I asked her to tell me what exactly happened. It took her a while before She opened up to me about how her and Mrs Agnes had a big issue 5 months back concerning a plot of land that papa gave to us 2 years ago. My mother was a farmer, she majorly grows cassava, she also process it to make cassava flakes, which is generally known as garri . Which she takes it to the market. She makes a profit as much as N5000 per sack. That's how she has been surviving ever since papa neglected her for his second wife. Now, this same second wife has picked interest in that same plot of land and wants it for herself alone. She continued that "their was a time. She was working on the farm when Mrs Agnes came over to threaten her from stepping her foot into the farm land or whatever happens to her she would be responsible for the consequences thereafter. Meanwhile, papa called a meeting and promised me another land which was closer to the house but I insisted that I wont be shut shamed by my junior wife. Two weeks after the incident I had a nightmare. Four women dressed in black, I don't know who this women were and I had never met them before in my entire existence. They came with huge bamboo sticks and started beating me in my dream, I was beaten to stupor. Thereafter, I woke up from my sleep but I wasn't my self either. " Ever since then my condition has worsened. She started crying bitterly and coughing simultaneously, murmuring what she has done exactly to deserve this. It was at this moment I knew this matter was beyond the physical. This got me more worried, because of the confrontation I had with her earlier during the day. I couldn't even gist my mother about it. I was scared that it might worsen her condition. I comforted her and we prayed gently together. I stood up to get her a glass water to give to her, then administered the medication prescribed for her. After a while, we retired to our various rooms and said farewell to each other. I was awakened, by the swishing noise of a broom sweeping the floor, I tried opening my eyes as the just-risen sun shone softly on my eyes, blinding me badly. I had woken up quite late than usual, came down from my bed prayed for some minutes, went to my mothers room greeted her and did some little exercise. I had mentally prepared myself for today's activity. I planned on visiting Mrs Agnes to apologise to her concerning my misconduct. Hoping she would pay a blind eye to what happened the previous day. I went ahead to take my bath, dressed up and headed towards her house. On arrival, I heard lot of voices in her sitting room. She seems to have lot of visitors. I found myself in a cross-road either to go in and apologise or come back later when she would probably be less busy. I never knew I could be scared of a human this way. I gently knocked on the door thrice, and waited for a response. Not quite long I heard someone said "come in". I walked inside and met a group of women seated on the dining area. Seemed they were having a meeting and I interrupted. I noticed all eyes were on me when I entered. I went on my knees and greeted them all at once. My step mother walked forward towards me wearing a devilish smile on her face, asking me if I was back to insult her the more. I didn't let her finish her statement before I prostrated before her, touching her feet's and asking her to forgive me. After laying there for over long time. she then asked me to stand up and claimed she had forgiven me. I thanked her for having such a compassionate heart and begged to take my leave. She walked me to the doorstep and then told me silently while smiling "Don't worry I don't feed on chick's". I pretended not to understand what she meant. I then Smiled back at her, right after and left immediately. I walked as fast as my legs could carry me, until I left her compound. My 1month holiday was already half-way spent, I couldn't believe I had spent two weeks already at home. Today, was the due date of Mama's appointment with the doctor. She honestly haven't been improving as I expected but she seems to be looking better than the first time we visited the clinic. The plan was to go with Papa but it didn't go as planned. So I would be the only one going with her eventually. We got to the clinic very early, luckily we were given a number card of 26. That's was so fulfilling. We didn't wait for upto an hour before we were called inside. The doctor we saw two weeks ago wasn't the one seeing us today. I asked about him, and I was told he was in the next consulting room. I politely asked if it's was possible to see him instead. He wasn't happy about my appeal but he didn't act irrational about it. So he explained to the nurse and another patient was asked to come in while we stepped out. Thereafter, we were called to the second consulting room. And there he was the cute NYSC doctor that saw us last two weeks. To my surprise my mama recognized him and they exchange pleasantries. He asked for any new complaint. I told him she doesn't seem to be getting better and she sleeps alot. From the way I was explaining her symptoms he seemed to have knew I was medically oriented. He then asked me if I was a nurse, I told him not yet that I am still a student. He was impressed and it made me had butterflies. That was so foolish of me. He then picked up mama's folder, and started flipping through the pages. Then I saw that his facial countenance changed. I could tell their was something wrong but I couldn't place my finger on what exactly. He stood up and faces the window with a report film showing the X-ray of my mama's chest. He looked up for so long biting his pen and when he was done he stared at me wearing a worrisome look. Immediately asked me if I was the first child, I told him no but I was the most educated among my sibling. And I would be the right person he could talk too. So he went ahead to ask me if I had heard about the word TUMOUR. I looked at him in disbelief,I knew what he was trying to say. But I wasn't ready to hear it. I immediately stood up and went towards the window. My mama was just staring at both of us. She didn't understand what was going on yet, but it won't take long before she reads the room. How was I going to tell her that she has CANCER. "Miss Mercy" the doctor called, I know this must be difficult for you but please you have to calm down and have a sit. so, that I can be able to explain to you what exactly is going on. He eventually stood up and assisted me back to my sit. I had no other option but to listen to him and put my emotions aside. since, it was not going to help in any way solve the problem at the moment. Because, they were hundreds of other patient waiting out there, impatiently waiting to see him. Despite the whole choas happening, I was also surprised he knew my name. But that didn't matter right now. I was concerned about what the situation at hand held.