My Boyfriends Brother

Chapter 9 Mathew’s Meddling

I was standing over Sierra as she was googling “how do I know if I’m a medium” on her laptop. We had managed to get back to our house and researching any information on what she and I am. We’d already spent hours here. It was getting late and the sun had already started to set. I hadn’t disappeared yet and I wondered if this meant I would be able to stay. Sure I wouldn’t be alive but Sierra and I could still be together. Well not together- together since we can’t touch each other. Not sure how we’re going to work that one out but we’ll cross that bridge when we get there. I was just happy that even in death I could still be a part of Sierra’s life. I was planning on proposing to her after her birthday. Of course I had to die a week before her birthday. Just. My. Luck. I glanced down in the corner of her screen to see the date. Damn, I had been MIA for 6 days? Her birthday was tomorrow. Could I still Propose? I mean I know I’m a ghost and all…Can someone even marry a ghost? Is that even legal? I chuckled to myself and Sierra looked up. “What are you chuckling at?” she asked.

“Oh, nothing. Just thinking.” I wasn’t lying. I rather not tell her about the whole marriage thing. Not until we find more information on her whole medium thing.

“Oh, so it’s not this article? I thought the title was kinda funny, ’15 Signs You’re a Psychic Medium – Not a Crazy Person.’ “

I laughed at that, “See? You’re not crazy!” We both laughed then.

Sierra’s phone started going off and before I could see who was calling she shut it off. “Who was that?” I asked.

“Oh…ummm…Michael,” she said with an odd tone in her voice.

“How’s he handling my whole…you know…death?” I hadn’t even thought about my brother since I appeared as a ghost. Man, I must be a horrible brother.

“He’s uh…handling it okay,” again she sounded weird.

“Can you tell me anything else? Like what’s he been doing? I hope he hasn’t turned to drinking—“

“NO!” she cleared her throat and continued, “I mean, no, I haven’t really been spending a whole lot of time with him. I don’t know what he’s been up to.” She sounded like she was hiding something.

Was my brother doing bad? Was he not handling my death well and going downhill? Maybe she doesn’t want me to know so I don’t feel bad. Well, too late for that. I left my only brother along. I died. We didn’t really have our parents to rely on anymore. I was glad when I finally got away from them and moved out here. Best decision I ever made. If I hadn’t of moved out here, I would’ve never met Sierra.

“You think we could go visit him? I know he probably won’t be able to see me but—“

She cut me off again and rambled, “I don’t know if that’s a good idea. I mean, what are we even supposed to do? It’s not like you’ll be able to talk to him since only I can see you and I don’t want to walk in there like ‘hey remember how your brother died? Well I can talk to his ghost!’ Yeah, I’m not trying to feel or look even more crazy than I already do.”

She had a point. “I get that but maybe just ask him how he’s doing? I just want to listen. He’s my brother Sierra. I want to make sure he’s okay.”

She contemplated and said, “Maybe later? I’m kinda tired and I want to take a nap. Staring at this screen for hours hasn’t been kind to my eyes.”

“Okay… Um you can go to sleep…I’ll just…” I trailed off. What was I to do? Do ghosts even sleep? I feel like staring at her while she sleeps would be a little too creepy. “What can I do?”

“Ummm…I could put a Netflix show on in the living room? You could watch that?” she offered.

“Yeah, I suppose that would work. Let’s just hope I don’t reach the ‘Are you still watching?’ prompt before you wake up,” I laughed. That would be my luck too.

“You know for a dead guy, you seem to laugh a lot!” we both laughed at that and I reached out to pull Sierra into a hug. Our laughter was quickly extinguished as my arms passed through her. “Mathew…” she whispered, her voice filled with sadness.

“I, um, forgot. Wasn’t thinking. It’s fine. If you could…help put something on for me to watch and I’ll let you go take your nap.”

The look on her face was heartbreaking. She just nodded, put a show on and walked to our bedroom.

“I’ll see you when I wake up right? Like you’re not going to disappear?” she asked.

“Yeah I’ll be waiting. I love you Sierra.”

“I love you too Mathew.” And with that she closed the door.

I looked around the house. It was a little messy. I hadn’t been there to clean up after her. My brother and I developed a keen desire for cleanliness. Sierra was a little messy but I never minded. It gave me something to do. I walked over to the kitchen to find plates piled up in the sink and the trash can almost overflowing. It use to me my job to clean those things. She’d cook, I’d clean the dishes. Every couple of days I’d take the trash out too. I haven’t been here to do that though. It feels like yesterday for me, that I left this house to go out surfing. Sierra was out picking up some groceries after work and the weather hadn’t been too bad when I left. I looked over at the fridge where we kept a little white board to write each other notes. My note was still there…

Hey Love, went for a surf. Be back by dinner.

I felt a heartbreaking pain inside. I didn’t make it back. I died. I reached up to touch the note and again nothing. I felt nothing. I could feel pain though. My lungs started to burn and the taste of salt water returned to my mouth. I started to choke. Memories flashed through my mind. I was struggling to reach the surface of the water. I kept swallowing water and then as the waves continued to crash into me I inhaled water and I kept inhaling water. I couldn’t get out. I kept trying to take a breath but the only thing I was taking in was more seawater. I collapsed to the floor and grasped my chest. What is happening? I’m already dead! Please god don’t make me suffer this pain again! I heard Sierra running to my aid but then—

Then everything went dark. Nothing. I was back into nothing. What happened? Why did I disappear? Is this it then? Am I moving on? No! I can’t leave Sierra again! I can’t! She needs me! She must’ve seen me disappear. I heard her coming. Oh god no. My poor love.

Suddenly the ocean appeared in front of me. The same ocean I died in. The same ocean Sierra comes to mourn. The horrible taste of seawater was lingering in my mouth again. I’m back? But how? I was in our house. In our kitchen. That’s where I felt the pain of death again. It hurt so much and reliving it was a nightmare I wouldn’t wish on anyone.

It was daylight now. It had just been night moments ago. Yet here I was staring at an ocean in broad daylight. It felt as if it was later in the morning. Around the same time as before when I appeared. What kind of hell is this?