Crimson Haze

I reluctantly embrace the sweet arms of slumber, darkness engulfing my mind. In the distance I start to hear faint childlike voices coming towards me. MOTHER!…. MOTHER!….MOTHER!!!! I can hear their fear. The ground starts to rumble and I can see fire raining outside the window my body starts to tremble with knowing fear of immediate danger that follows the childrens' painful screams. The voices seem to echo as if multiple children were trying to address me, the screams are unbearable to listen to beckoningme closer and closer into the dimly lit hallway. I have had this dream many times over but never so vividly. This enigmatic dream that haunts my mind, I am wearing a long white flowing night gown something you’d probably see in a Jane Austin style movie, I look aimlessly around in the dimmly candle lit, stone walled room, I can hear faint screams from children for me to help. I can see shadows of the children silhouette with there arms stretched out trying to embrace me. My arms and body hurriedly move towards them, I try to embrace them as if to protect them their two little shadows dissolve in my hands. As I aimlessly try to find them I’m engulfed in darkness and I can see a mans strong blood soaked hands reaching for me as I uncontrollably try to reach out to him I wake up. Always in this dream I have no control as if I’m watching a movie. It’s always been the same on and off since I turned 16 years old. After I blew out my birthday candles I started to get a headache I didn't want to be rude so I went to the bathroom splashed some cold water on my face took a few deep breaths and returned to the party. I visited with my friends and family with a forced smile for as the night progressed my headache evolved into a migraine. The pain was beginning to become to much I quickly gave my thanks and said good-night. I struggled to get upstairs finally collapsing on the third step and my father picked me up and took me to my room. As he laid me down I began to profusely sweat and the dreams started. In the beginning they were only screams and shadows. Now over the years the dreams have progressed into a more intimidating and longing of wanting to know what's wrong with me. I try to collect myself as I wake and try to collect the new bits of information, but also praying that after that type of horror they would stop. Granted these dreams may not seem like much, but I was already under enough stress and this dream doesn't help. I gather enough of my senses to look where I had fallen asleep. “ UGH! I can’t believe I passed out in the library again.” Atleast I fell asleep in the one place I could find solitude trying not to think of the betrayal of my former boyfriend and my sister, as flashes of them together try to enter my mind I roll my eyes and wipe my tears away. I check the time on my phone “O goody it’s 8 o’clock in the morning” I said sarcastically “…my parents are going to kill me.” As I struggle to gather my things I see a very familiar friendly face knocking on the front door of the library. I hurry to the front door to unlock it, I was extremely surprised to see that I had enough sense to lock the door before I fell asleep. When I unlock the door my best friend Janelle is patiently waiting, her bright contagious smile and hazel golden eyes staring back at my very dark swollen green and blue eyes and exhausted expression. I’ve always tried to understand how this girl could even want to be my friend she has always been so popular. She could have any friend she ever wanted instead she got stuck with a friend like me a bookworm who doesn’t like to leave the library or socialize. I suppose you could say it’s a tale as old as time popular girl befriends the nerd. Although she has her pick of friends and has many of them. She always makes time for me it’s always been like this since we were kids she was always there to stand up for me when I needed it or a shoulder to cry on I could never say that she was a bad popular person she is basically an angel.