Play Pretend

Chapter 12

Talk

“H-ha?” My eyelids fluttered in shock and amusement. Tuluyan na ring gumaang ang pakiramdam ko, though a kick of nervousness slightly rose inside me.

“You’ll come with us inside the office,” ulit niya.

Bakit kasama rin ako? Ano ang gagawin ko roon? Gusto ko bang madinig ang pag-uusapan nila?

“Xaiver, uhm…”

Zoe moved forward to steal Xaiver’s attention. And as if Xaiver didn’t want to be any closer to her, he stepped back, and I felt his arm graze mine as he did. Kung ano ang kinalayo niya kay Zoe ay ganoon siya kalapit sa akin.

Nakita ni Zoe ang lahat nang ‘yon. Her jaw moved a bit as she licked her lips. I also caught her clenching her fist quickly. Unti-unti ring namula ang kanyang pisngi sa hiya o inis.

“What?” Xaiver snapped.

Nag-aalangang tumingin namg diretso si Zoe sa kanya. Despite being in an embarrassing situation, she still managed to lift her chin. “Kung pwede sana, I want to talk to you privately.” She gave me a quick glance. “Can your secretary just stay outside and wait for us? Sandali lang naman. Ten minutes like you said.”

“If it’s still not obvious, that’s already the ultimatum. Take it or leave it,” paglilinaw sa kanya ni Xaiver. “It’s either you’ll allow Chantal to join us, or you’ll leave the building. Hindi tayo mag-uusap nang wala siya. Make your choice.”

Bawat salita na pinapakawalan ni Xaiver ay palakas nang palakas ang pagtibok ng puso ko. I had no idea if he was just firing those words para sumuko na si Zoe at magalit sa kanya, pero kahit na ano pa ang dahilan niya, I was surely getting swayed.

“O-okay, then. I’ll take it,” pagpayag ni Zoe bandang huli. Hindi ko na mabilang kung ilang beses siyang napahiya in just a day, but she was still standing tall.

Naunang pumasok si Xaiver sa loob ng kanyang opisina at bago ako sumunod ay pinauna ko muna ang aming bisita. Taas-noo pa rin si Zoe habang naglalakad papasok. Sinundan niya si Xaiver hanggang sa makarating sa tanggapan.

Xaiver sat on the main couch, kung saan siya lagi umuupo, while Zoe had the courtesy to sit just right in front of him. Uupo na sana ako roon sa single couch sa gilid, ngunit bago pa ako makadiretso ay bahagya nang umusod si Xaiver upang bigyan ako ng space sa tabi niya.

“Tabi ka sa akin,” Xaiver simply told me and lightly tapped his side.

I pursed my lips. Napasulyap ako kay Zoe. Mukhang nagkunwari na lamang siyang walang nadinig dahil hindi nagbago ang kanyang ekspresyon at diretso pa rin ang tingin kay Xaiver.

“Come here,” dagdag ni Xaiver nang hindi pa rin ako kumikilos upang tumabi sa kanya.

“O…kay.”

I hesitantly took the space beside Xaiver. The couch was huge, so I put enough distance between us. Iba nga lang ang gustong mangyari ni Xaiver. Umusod siya palapit sa akin until we were only apart for an inch or two.

I froze in place and held onto my knees tightly as if I was on a rollercoaster ride. Pasulyap-sulyap din ako kay Zoe upang makita kung ano ang kanyang reaksyon, but she remained looking indifferent. Mukhang aral na kung paano mapipigilan ang sarili.

“Ten minutes,” ulit ni Xaiver once he was satisfied with our position. “You can start talking now.”

Zoe swallowed hard, then shifted on her seat. “I had a talk with Tita Mira. Gusto kong malaman kung mayroon kang sinabi sa kanya,” nag-aalangan niyang sabi. “She asked me to stay away from you and just find someone else.”

Napasinghap ako.

Akala ko ba si Mrs. Dela Vega ang nagpapunta sa kanya rito? Pinapalayo naman pala siya kay Xaiver. She lied to me!

“She did, huh?” Mapaglaro ang tono ng boses ni Xaiver.

Medyo napakunot ang noo ni Zoe dahil sa naging reaksyon ni Xaiver. On the other hand, I knew he was about to say things that Zoe would never forget.

“May sinabi sa kanya?” Xaiver then sounded a little confused after showing his playful side. Mas lalo akong kinabahan kahit na hindi naman ako ang kausap niya. “I’m not sure what you’re referring to, Miss Bautista. Hindi ba’t ikaw ang may mga sinabi sa kanya?”

Zoe’s lips parted. She looked nervous as she shifted her gaze, avoiding locking eyes with Xaiver.

“I don’t know what my mother promised you, but I don’t care about any of that, Miss Bautista. Labas ako sa mga pinag-usapan ninyo,” Xaiver bluntly said. “Kahit paulit-ulit kang magsumbong sa kanya, wala akong pakialam. Kahit ilang beses kang magpalakad, I will never like you.”

“Hindi ako nagsumbong! I just told her what happened!” katwiran ni Zoe.

“While balling your eyes out?” Xaiver chuckled without humor. “I wonder what your intention is, hmm? Nagpapaawa ka? You want my mom to do the heavy lifting for you? You think she can convince me to like you?”

Kinagat ko ang aking labi. Wala sa sarili akong napahawak sa braso ni Xaiver upang mapigilan siya nang kahit ilang sandali. He was spitting words mercilessly and didn’t bother filtering things out. Wala siyang pakialam kahit masaktan niya si Zoe.

Alam kong may gusto lang siyang mapatunayan. He wanted Zoe to stop it with him, pero kahit sa akin ay hindi naging maganda ang mga naririnig ko. Nagbabadya na ang luha ni Zoe. Sa tingin ko, ilang segundo na lang ay talagang maiiyak na siya. Hindi na ako siguro kung deserved niya pa ba ‘yon dahil sa ugali niyang hindi ko gusto, but either way, I didn’t want to witness it.

Bahagyang nahinto si Xaiver. He glanced at me, and I stared back at him, hoping that he would get my message. Mukhang wala nga lang siyang pakialam. Ibinalik niya agad ang tingin kay Zoe.

“No one can dictate to me what to do, not even my mother,” he said. “Now, if my mother is asking you to stay away from me, ano ngayon ang ginagawa mo rito?”

“X-Xaiver!” Nanginig ang labi ni Zoe.

Pahiyang-pahiya na siya at alam kong mas nagpadagdag pa ang presensya ko sa ikinababahala niya.

“About the necklace….” Nagpatuloy si Xaiver at umayos ng upo. “If you think I did that to humiliate you, I’m sorry, but you’re mistaken. I won’t waste that much money on you — no matter what reason I have.”

“Then why did you bid on the necklace?” tanong ni Zoe nang medyo makabawi. She looked so determined to know the reason.

“Do you really wanna know?” hamon ni Xaiver sa kanya.

“Yes.”

Narinig ko ang paggalaw ng mga labi ni Xaiver upang ngumiti. He leaned forward to taunt Zoe more. “I bought the necklace because I noticed it caught her attention. She seemed to like it.”

Napalunok ako’t parang nalagutan ng hininga.

Is he…?

Zoe suspiciously glanced at me. “She?”

I held onto my breath while waiting for Xaiver to speak. Napasinghap nga lang ako nang bigla niyang inabot at hinawakan ang aking kamay. He then smoothly intertwined our fingers.

I panicked and looked at Zoe. Nakaawang na ang kanyang mga labi habang titig na titig sa kamay namin ni Xaiver na magkahawak. She looked horrified as if holding hands with Xaiver was a sin I committed.

Sinubukan kong bumitiw at bawiin ang kamay ko, but Xaiver just held me tightly. Hindi niya hinayaang makalaya ako sa kanyang pagkakahawak. Napatingin na rin ako sa aming mga kamay. His knuckles were close to turning white, and the veins at the back of his hand almost popped out.

“If I haven’t made it obvious yet, I like Chantal,” Xaiver casually said something so controversial, drawing a huge response from Zoe and me.

Muli kong sinubukang bawiin ang kamay ko kay Xaiver, but just like earlier, he didn’t let it happen. Ipinatong niya pa ang magkahawak naming kamay sa ibabaw ng kanyang hita.

Mas lalong nanlaki ang mga mata ni Zoe at nag-angat ulit ng tingin kay Xaiver. “What?” She was utterly speechless. “But she’s just your secretary!”

“So?” Xaiver tilted his head. “Is there a law prohibiting me from dating my secretary?”

“She is just your secretary!” ulit ni Zoe. She stressed every word out para matauhan si Xaiver. “She is way below you! You are the CEO of a huge empire! Tita Mira won’t approve of this, I know!”

“And like I said, I don’t care what my mom thinks about my relationship with other people, most especially about the woman I like,” tuloy-tuloy na sabi ni Xaiver. “I will date whoever I want — and that’s Chantal.”

“Xaiver, please...” I couldn’t take it any longer. Kailangan ko na siyang patigilin sa mga kalokohan niya. Sigurado akong kung ano man ang mga lumabas sa bibig niya ay makakrating kay Mrs. Dela Vega. That was the last thing I wanted to happen, lalo na’t gustong-gusto niyang mahanap kung sino ang nagugustuhan ng kanyang anak. Naiintindihan ko ang gustong iparating ni Zoe.

Nilingon ako ni Xaiver. I was begging him with my eyes to stop. I was fortunate that he seemed to get and take my message that time around. Instead of pushing himself and continuing with the play I didn’t want to participate in, he exhaled heavily, let go of my hand, and stood up.

Iniwan niya kaming dalawa ni Zoe sa may tanggapan habang siya’y naglakad palapit sa kanyang lamesa. I caught Zoe killing me with her sharp gaze. Ibinaba ko nga lang agad ang aking mga mata sa hita. I looked at my hand, which was slightly trembling. Xaiver’s warmth lingered on my skin, as well as the feeling of his calloused hand grazing my palm whenever he tightened his grip.

“Joseph, please escort Miss Bautista out of my office. Thanks,” dinig kong sabi ni Xaiver sa intercom.

Agad pumasok si Joseph sa loob ng opisina upang sundin ang utos sa kanya ni Xaiver. Kahit na mukhang madami pang gustong sabihin si Zoe, dahil siguro sa dinanas na kahihiyan ay tahimik na lamang siyang sumama palabas kay Joseph.

I was left with Xaiver inside the office. Wala sa sarili kong ibinalik ang tingin sa kanya. He hastily loosened his tie and sat on the edge of the table. Pagkatapos ay agad niya rin akong hinarap.

“Are you hungry? Shall we have our lunch served?” tanong niya na parang walang nangyari.

I opened my mouth, but I bit my lower lip right away before I could say something I shouldn’t. Nag-iwas na lamang ako ng tingin at hindi na inabala ang sariling sumagot. No matter what I said, siya pa rin naman ang masusunod. He’s the boss.

“I’ll call downstairs,” sabi niya nang hindi ako sumagot.

I knew it…

There was a different kind of awkward atmosphere between us during lunch. Wala ni isang nagsalita sa amin. Naramdaman ko ang pagtitig sa akin ni Xaiver buong oras, pero hindi ko na lamang ‘yon pinansin.

The silence lasted until we were on our way home. Ako ang nagmaneho pauwi gaya nang napagkasunduan. Hanggang sa sasakyan ay pirming nakatingin lamang si Xaiver sa akin. Para bang sinasadya niyang magpapansin para kausapin ko siya. However, I pretended to know nothing and stuck with being ignorant of his intense gaze.

“Dito na lang ako,” I said as soon as I stepped on the brake in front of our house. “Ingat ka sa pag-uwi.”

I quickly unfastened the seatbelt and unlocked the doors. Kakahawak ko pa lang sa handle nang biglang dumaan ang katawan ni Xaiver sa aking harapan. I abruptly stopped as he leaned forward to press on the lock again. His intention was obvious — he didn’t want me to go yet.

“Let’s talk before you go home,” Xaiver simply said and turned his head to me.

Dahil nakaabante pa rin ang kanyang katawan ay sobrang lapit ng kanyang mukha sa akin. I felt slightly conscious being that close to him. Halos magdikit na ang tungki ng ilong naming dalawa. His hot breath was already touching my lips. His body was blocking the light and the view from outside. His face was all I could see.

“You’ve been very quiet since Zoe left the office,” Xaiver pointed out, then rested his arm on the car seat shoulder to make himself comfortable. “What’s bothering you, hmm?”

At that moment, I could no longer hold myself back. Matalim ko siyang tiningnan. Is he seriously asking that?

“Hindi mo ba talaga alam?” nakakunot kong tanong sa kanya.

Xaiver tilted his head. “Ang alin?”

“Iyong mga sinabi mo kanina kay Zoe! I’m sure makakarating ‘yon sa Mama mo!”

“So what?”

Mas lalo akong nainis sa kanyang pagwawalang-bahala ng bagay na kinakatakutan kong mangyari. His nonchalant tone and expression made me want to explode. I just didn’t know how I would slap the problem right on his face para makita at maramdaman niya.

“So what?” ulit ko at napaupo nang maayos. Bahagyang napaatras si Xaiver nang dahil doon. “Alam kong gusto mo lang na tumigil si Zoe, pero hindi mo na dapat sinabi pa ang mga bagay na ‘yon. Paano kung maniwala ang si Mrs. Dela Vega sa mga kasinungalingang sinabi mo kanina kay Zoe?”

Xaiver cut his eyes in half. “Which one?”

“Anong which one?”

“Alin sa mga sinabi ko kanina ang kasinungalingan para sa ‘yo?”

“‘Yung sinabi mong gusto mo ako!”

Kasabay ng aking pagsagot sa kanyang tanong ay bigla ulit siyang lumapit. He slammed his right hand on the left side of my seat. My eyes widened with my eyelids fluttering as I stared back at him. Nakitaan ko ng kaonting galit ang kanyang mga mata.

“Sino ba ang nagsabing nagsisinungaling lang ako?”

Nanginig ang aking mga labi. Hindi na ako makapagsalita.

“Who told you, hmm?”

“X-Xaiver…” Napahawak ako sa kanyang dibdib nang mas lalo siyang lumapit sa akin.

Saglit niyang ibinaba ang tingin sa aking kamay. He, fortunately, stopped charging in and settled with the distance left between us.

“I’m not lying, Chantal,” Xaiver said quietly, and he didn’t hesitate. “Noong sinabi kong gusto kita, totoo ‘yon. So I don’t f*****g care even if it reaches my mom. I can vouch for that.”

“N-nababaliw ka na ba?” Iyon na lamang ang tanging nasabi ko. I was trying so hard to deny the truth.

Xaiver chuckled lightly, then smirked. “Nababaliw?” he echoed. “Well, then, I guess I am.”

My lips parted as I inhaled sharply. Sinubukan kong ibaba ang tingin upang iwasan ang kanyang mga mata. His chiseled chest caught me off guard when my eyes dropped to his half-open button-down shirt. Hindi ko napansing hindi na nakasara ang ibang butones ng kanyang damit at nakahubad na rin ang necktie.

Dali-dali kong ibinalik na lang ulit ang atensyon sa kanyang mukha. Heat rushed up to my cheeks. I pursed my lips and braced myself while looking at him.

“I’ve tried taking things slow for you. Ayoko sanang biglain ka. But you keep missing the point and getting the wrong ideas,” Xaiver said, his expression turning serious. “So I’m done with playing kind and patient, Chantal. I was never one. I’ll show you who I really am from now on.”

Mariin kong kinuyom ang aking kamao at napalunok habang nakatitig sa kanya.

“Why don’t I start by asking the question I asked you days ago…” he whispered meaningfully as he swiftly moved his lips closer to my ear. “What do you think about marrying me?”