Zainab

Chapter Two

Chapter TwoSayyid Mahmoud, the owner of these lands, came from a large extended family, his deceased father having left behind four wives when he died apart from two others who had passed away during his lifetime. In spite of the large number of offspring that had died before the age of six—twenty-five as far as Sayyid Mahmoud could remember—there remained twelve children, of both sexes, on the day of his death. Such circumstances meant that the children differed greatly in age, from the eldest who was fifty to the youngest, a child aged three and still at its mother’s breast. They had all inherited a portion of the estate but in view of Sayyid Mahmoud’s position as the eldest male he had acquired by his own efforts, and with the help of his father, considerable wealth and was now head of the family and legal guardian to his younger relations. He was a kind-hearted man with a clear conscience, loving towards his brothers and affectionate with the children. In spite of the mistrust which existed among those born of different wives and the dissent that was sown between them by their respective mothers, Sayyid Mahmoud treated all his brothers as his sons. Besides his own good nature, this attitude may have had something to do with the instructions his father had given him from his deathbed. Unable to hold back the tears which fell from the corners of his eyes as he took a last look at the world he was leaving, he had said in a trembling voice:

‘I have entrusted your brothers to your care Mahmoud, now treat them as your sons.’

As for Sayyid Mahmoud’s own children they were eight in number, all from one wife, consisting of four boys and four girls. He took a keen interest in their welfare and sent all his sons to school as soon as they were old enough but as to exercising any control himself he was more inclined to leave them to themselves, an attitude which cannot be attributed to one clear cause. He was a respectable man and it would have been quite reasonable for him to keep his children under strict supervision, as was the custom, or at least make them examples of obedience and good behaviour when they were in his presence in accordance with the requirements of Egyptian politesse. Certainly he appeared very stern when they came to him but he lacked that aspect of fearsomeness that his contemporaries possessed in front of their children. For this reason, and also because he belonged to the wealthy class of Egyptian notables, it is difficult to say whether his liberal attitudes were the result of a particular theory of education. Maybe he held Spencer’s* view that children must be their own teachers as far as possible and that one should not object to anything they do unless there is some grave danger to themselves.

Accordingly his sons passed the days of their summer holiday in the fields and often spent the nights there too during the harvest, enjoying the air and the songs of the working girls or sitting beside the perpetually humming water wheels. Only Hamid, the eldest of them, differed in this respect, being more inclined to stay in the village and spend his time with the people in the guesthouse. The reason for this lay in his early upbringing when his father had devoted himself to him entirely, making sport in which he revelled without restraint. In moments of joy, he gave his heart to this child whom he loved more than anything and felt to be a part of himself, caressing him contentedly. In moments of anger, when he might have beaten him, the child’s grandmother intervened and prevented any discipline of this kind. As a result, when Hamid was only five years old he was very spoilt, often crying and always the centre of attention. Despite his age he was often to be seen carried on the shoulders of the men and womenfolk. His favourite times were the hours he spent playing with Aziza, his cousin, when she came to the village with her mother.

Although he was two years older, his fondness for her was evident and it was not long before the women of the house had decided that one day they would be bride and groom.

Hamid’s father sent him first to Koran school, then primary school. The years passed and he remained the focus of affection among his family who were proud of the merit he achieved in his studies. Bur his habit of staying within the walls of the village persisted at a time when his brothers and uncles were out in the fields. On the few occasions he accompanied his father, he neither knew his whereabouts nor the extent of the lands which belonged to them.

In the forenoon of one burning hot day when Zainab was working with her companions weeding the cotton bushes, Hamid did venture out with his younger brothers whose youthfulness made them zealous and fired them with a keenness to exert authority. They would only participate in the work for a short time however, before retiring, their brows covered in sweat, to shelter beneath the trees or rest their backs against the tree trunks. No sooner had the sweat dried on their foreheads than one of them would be on his way back, shouting to the workers as he approached that they were and not working hard enough. But on reaching them, something prevented him from working himself, as though he feared that he might become tired and thereby undermine his authority to order the others.

Hamid made his way over to the workers, scrutinising their faces and putting the occasional question to Ibrahim, the foreman, about the progress of the work. But after an hour he could not bear tire heat of the sun and retreated to the shade of the trees where he sat talking with one of his brothers. When his brother left, Hamid sat by himself, observing the boys and girls sweating in the heat as they toiled over their work. If they so much as raised their heads, Ibrahim or one of the ‘gentlemen’, as Hamid’s brothers and uncles were known, would call out. Then they all slipped from his mind and he was alone in his own world, remembering the day Aziza had departed not long before, having spent a few days in the village. He had often sat with her in the company of his aunt and Aziza’s brother and their conversation was always pleasant and merry. Recalling that day it seemed that the talk of the women who had made a ‘couple’ of them in their childhood still echoed in his mind, and the feeling grew inside him that one day he would possess this girl and have her to love.

In this Egyptian environment and with an upbringing such as Hamid’s, it is not uncommon for young men to grow up with a false view of life. They often live in a land of fancy, creating their own happiness and suffering while painting the present and future with their own desires. Relying on such imaginings to get them through their work, many boys colour the outside world in a contradictory manner. Although their senses may belie their imaginings, the power of their fantasies is strong enough to overcome them, making them disbelieve what they see or distorting their judgement and estimation of what stands before them. So if Aziza was very thin it was because of the daintiness of her stature and however lacking in beauty she may really have been, to Hamid she was as beautiful as a flower. If she was somewhat empty-headed then that was due to the very purity of her love. In this way they roam behind their dreams, believing that their future wellbeing will accord with the world they imagine, filled with joys and delights. A world in which one can sit with one’s partner, loving her lawfully while gazing at the stars or listening quietly to the voices of the night. When reality brings them back to earth or work forces them down from their splendid illusions, despair enters their souls and takes the place of those farreaching hopes.

Aziza had been taught reading and writing by her father until the age of ten then she was sent to a sewing and embroidery teacher with whom she stayed for another two years. Her education ended when she started to wear the veil and this also prevented her from further meetings with many of her acquaintances. At the age of fourteen she began to read various books which fell into her hands and whatever difficulties she may have experienced in reading them, tales of romance are always appealing and enjoyed by every girl and boy. Would that she had read something better though, than these romantic love stories but regretfully there was nothing else available. Moreover, only the private and intimate conversations of the lovers attracted her attention while she ignored the plainer parts which bored her or occasionally made her feel downright annoyed! Since childhood she had always been physically weak and as the inactive life she led did nothing to improve her strength, she remained so. When she was no longer allowed to go out by herself, her colour paled and her body grew even thinner so that after a year had passed she was in great need of a change of air. She also fell victim to the dampness of the large house in which she lived and this affected her most adversely, especially in winter. Consequently her health never improved.

Unbiased nature knew that this was not her fault just as it is not the fault of girls in similar situations and upon becoming secluded at home something awakened in the soul of one of her relatives, who had always been kind to her as a child.

Stirred by his dreams, Hamid imagined Aziza to be everything he wanted. He remained under the tree until the sun reached its zenith, signalling the time for the midday break, and the workers had only to finish the row they were on before taking to the shade with their meagre lunches. At the same time Hamid and his brothers’ dinner arrived, brought by their servant and they sat down to eat it without delay.

When the rest period was over, the boys and girls returned to work followed by Hamid’s brothers while Hamid stayed behind and stretching out in the shade of the trees, he fell asleep. An hour later the afternoon train passed by, waking him from his slumber, and he got up to see what was happening in the fields. Because he sometimes liaised with Ibrahim in the office there was a degree of familiarity between them, rather than the indifference that existed between himself and the majority of workers from the village. For this reason Ibrahim answered Hamid’s questions plainly, with a permanent smile on his face. When some of the boys saw that Hamid did not appear too proud to be approached, they thought they might score over their companions if they tried to speak to him. But Hamid sent one of them back to work without listening to a word and shouted angrily at another, who believed himself worthy of his attention but whose hopes were dashed by this rebuke from one of the ‘gentlemen’.

Examining the faces of the nearby workers, Zainab’s beauty caught Hamid’s eye and he wondered who she was and whether she usually came to the fields. Back among his family however, such thoughts were soon forgotten.

As the days passed by and the work continued, the fallaheen never complained about the heat of the sun when it burned down upon them during the day. They remained constant, living a life of patience and enduring what their forefathers had endured before them. Their steadfastness, with its roots in history—passed on from generation to generation from the time of the Pharoahs through the rule of Ismael* to the present day—grants to this unfortunate group some degree of happiness in their lives so that even in the face of eternal poverty, they bear their burdens with smiles of contentment upon their weathered faces.

The farmlands appealed to Hamid when he saw how beautiful they were: the plants, trees and streams, the fresh air—and the sturdy working girls. He began to go there every day before sunset and gradually forgot about Aziza. His particular happiness lay in returning from the fields with the workers, enjoying the sensation of freedom he experienced then and release from the cold and heavy chains of custom. At the same time he was less inclined towards girls of his own social group because of the veil which makes boys of his age, in the prime of life, turn elsewhere for natural affection. In reality, his attraction for the working girls was far more healthy than the pursuits of those who jeopardise their feelings and wealth in order to satisfy their carnal desires. And just as we cannot condemn those young men for what they do, it being more the fault of Egyptian society and its adherence to the veil, neither can we begrudge Hamid whose inclinations were only nominally harmful.

After some days the workers were accustomed to Hamid’s presence and he would return from the fields by the side of Ibrahim or Zainab, conversing freely with them. Zainab’s simple nature revealed a spiritual beauty no less appealing than her physical charms so that whenever he looked at her wide eyes, protected by her pretty eyelashes, he felt as though he were gazing into another world, full of love and desire. As she strode along with firm footsteps, her dress seemed to indicate the luxuriousness of her body and this fancy was strengthened by the softness he noticed in her hands, even though she worked with them.

Hamid soon got used to frequenting the fields, in fact he was so attracted to Zainab that he hardly let a day go by without going where he knew he would find her. And as though Zainab too, enjoyed his presence she never missed a day in the fields, preferring this to the building work available in the village which most of the country girls preferred. The truth was that he was very gentle with her, as any young man would be with a girl he finds agreeable. In spite of her humble status her beauty spoke out on her behalf and Hamid’s kindness and affection, something Zainab had never experienced before, drew her out of herself and captivated her. But although he was the only person who spoke to her in a way that expressed a measure of love, Zainab regarded him like any working girl regards her master, with an air of submission expressing both fear and caution.

One evening as the workers were returning from a distant field, Zainab was walking beside Hamid, conversing with him in her customary manner while he listened with pleasure to everything she said. And in that hour after sunset when all things appear as hardly discernible shapes, he put his arm round her waist and drew her towards him. Letting go of herself for a moment, their lips touched and she experienced all the warmth that there is in a kiss. Then pulling away, she said:

‘My sister will see us and tell my parents.’

Hamid felt a tremor run through his body. Aroused at first by desire, his mood changed abruptly to one of pride and arrogance as though all the traditions and customs of the past had been heaped together and thrown down upon his head. His face reddened in embarrassment as he backed away from Zainab, lost in strange thoughts and no longer aware whether she was speaking or not.

Leaving the workers at the entrance to the village, Hamid went straight to the guesthouse to drink coffee and quickly dismissed what had taken place. As for Zainab the kiss filled her with happiness, bringing her many pleasant dreams that kept her from talking to Hamid along the way. However much the peasant mind may tremble at the mention of the word honour, the natural instinct of the human heart to love is a compulsion much stronger than social convention, as long as the deed remains out of sight, safe from the judgement of men. When we examine the human condition with all its hopes and desires, we find that it demands what nature drives it to; food when hungry, water when thirsty and so on, so that even if a person achieves their heart’s desire, it is often due to forces beyond their control. At the same time man can only attain what his social position allows him to. Thus to a greater or lesser extent, he lives in a permanent state of conflict according to the amount of freedom his situation grants him in the way of achieving his aims and desires.

Hamid did not stop going to the fields, or returning by the side of Zainab, but he was more cautious in his conduct and less talkative. For her part she simply accepted his quietness as an expression of their closeness to one another. The natural pride which her beauty inspired restrained her from feigning conversation or stooping to the level so many girls would have stooped to if they had someone like Hamid to listen to them. As a result he found that he could kiss her from time to time without being shaken by shame, saying to himself: ‘Isn’t it natural for a boy to kiss a girl whose beauty pleases him?’

* English philosopher (d.1903) who upheld the doctrine of social laissez faire.

* Ismael Pasha, viceroy of Egypt 1863-1879.