The demon smiled, shook his head, slicked back his hair, and poof, he was gone. Gone but not forgotten. Mainly because he left a puddle of spooge in his wake. “Fuckwad.”
I sighed. I kept paper towels in the car. This was not my first spooge rodeo. I thought of killing Matty. The thought did not fill me with joy. And while I hated my ex, I hated him less when the demon wasn’t with me. Still, what if the demon was telling the truth? What if I was destined for an eternity of boils and puss and red-hot pokers up my bum? What if I could get an upgrade to a higher floor with a view and concierge service? Maybe killing Tom or Matty had a practical purpose.
My phone rang. “Thirty minutes,” he said. “What are you doing now? Your car hasn’t moved in a while.”
“I’m cleaning up demon jizz, if you m
