Flashbacks: Head Versus Heart

Chapter Two: Inner Monologues and Heavy Hearts

It was getting to be about time for lunch. I’ll need to finish packing before I meet up with my friend Mary for lunch. I met Mary my first year of college. She was my current best friend out here in the city. She knew everything about Colt I could possibly have told her. She knew about my worries of seeing him. Mary was a punk rock chick. She lived on her own too.

Her family life was rocky at best, and I never really made her talk about it unless she wanted to share. Her parents fought a lot, the one things that brought us together was the fact that we were both the only children our parents had. She was tall and slender, with long curly black hair to her butt-c***k. She had the darkest sense of humor, with the kindest heart imaginable. Hopefully a nice conversation with my ‘voice of reason’ will help settle my nerves before I head out to Vera’s.

I finally got to the café, scoped it out for Mary. I could find her in a room full of people. She had long curly brown hair, and always had a pissed off look on her face. Many people were intimidated by her because she had, what is commonly referred to as ‘resting b***h face’. She also gave off the “don’t give a f**k” attitude. However, deep down, she was the sweetest and wisest person I knew. I always found myself going to her for advice. 

“Jesus H – Took you long enough to get here, I about ate my own ass, waiting for you!” Mary exclaimed, giving me a look of sass and putting her cigarette out.

“Sorry, I got caught up packing, and thinking. ” I confessed. She knew that I still had lingering feelings for Colt. I didn’t even have to mention that it was him I was thinking of.

“Peri... Have you even told Colt that you’re going to visit his sister for 4 days? Does he even know you will be there?” Mary asked me with a serious tone and stern look on her face.

“Not really. I mean I posted that I’ll be visiting Vera on basically every social media outlet. I’m sure he saw it.” I held back that he had liked one of my posts – but didn’t comment on it.

I didn’t tell Mary, because I knew she would lecture me and tell me I’m being ridiculous.

Though Colt and I hadn’t seen each other, we have exchanged a few messages here and there on social media. Never anything serious just, the typical ‘how are you, blah blah’ conversation. Recently, though... he texted me, but the next morning he told me he was sorry for getting ahold of me and ‘drunkenly texting’ me, and he wouldn’t do it again – and he didn’t.

Mary and I spoke for about an hour about the anticipated trip and the plans that Vera and I had. Which is basically a whole lot of – relaxation! She gave me her advice on what to do if I run into Colt, and what to do if I don’t see him. Seriously, she gives the best advice.

It was about a three-and-a-half-hour drive from the café to Vera’s parent’s house. I could not wait to get there. I tried calling but she didn’t answer, so I left her a voicemail letting her know where I was at on my route. She must still be at work. Seeing the roads and scenery really bring back memories. The smells of the area, the blooms and the floral scents; they all have a memory that comes rushing back with them.

About an hour away from Vera’s was our high school. I can almost still hear the roars of the Friday night football games, as I drive by. I always loved watching Colt play football, and the way he would always give me a little wave while he winked, to acknowledge that he saw me there. I would rush every Friday, when Vera and I would get out of Volleyball practice to be there to encourage him.

After every football game, our group of friends would always get together at Tommy Frank’s house. His parents had a large wooded area behind their home they allowed us to hang out at. Tommy and some other guys would build bonfires and we would turn music up loud and stop worrying about all the petty things that came along with being a teenager. Any time anything big happened, we would celebrate out there with a good party too.

This whole time while I have been cruising and reminiscing, I hadn’t realized how close I was getting. I phoned Vera to let her know I was getting close to her parent’s house. I was so nervous to finally be back here; I must have continually thought this to myself a million times.

As I passed the sign entering Owlville (yes, you read that right, the man that founded this little town was obsessed with owls) – my entire facade of being ready to potentially see Colt went out the window. With every moment that I got closer to Vera’s, I started hoping he would miraculously be there, wanting to see me as much as I wanted to see him.

When I pulled up. Vera came running out, super excited, just as I was. We exchanged our greetings and excitement for the weekend, and got all my stuff inside... as Vera threw me a curveball.