Echoes In The Ashes

【1】

Catherine, come down right now." Mikhail yells from downstairs in his heavy Russian accent. I know he's angry, but I just want to enjoy my life. What is so wrong with having a boyfriend and kissing him?

I roll my eyes, put the book I'm currently reading down, and walk down the stairs to the dining room.

My friends say, I have to be happy I'm living in such a big house, that I get everything I want, but honestly I'm not happy, anymore.

There was a time when I used to enjoy everything, I was great full with everything Mikhail spoiled me with. But the older I got, I realized, it's just stupid.

"черт возьми." Mikhail curses under his breath when I take my seat, next to him.

Taking my fork, I start digging into my food, beef Stroganov, my favorite Russian dish, made of sautéed pieces of beef in a sauce of mustard and smetana.

Occasionally, I glance at Mikhail. I always introduce him as my brother, he's my best friend. I love him in so many ways, ways I can't even explain. He saved me from myself, the world even.

I realized he is all I need to survive. We may curse each other sometimes, but we love each other.

"I told you so many times Cathy, Ewan should not bring you home on that stupid, broken motorcycle of his. You can talk to him, but never, never again sit on that stupid thing, you hear me?"

"That was not Ewan."

"Jesus, introduce me to all your boyfriends, or I'll mistake Ewan for a thousand more." He wipes his mouth with a cloth and turns to face me, waiting for an answer.

I nod and continue devouring my food. His big hand lands on my shoulder and he turns me to face him, his angry gray eyes staring right at me, no he's staring through me. Jesus.

"Fine, dad." I joke and gulp down my coke. His lips curl in a grin and he takes the dishes to the sink and starts cleaning them.

The house phone starts ringing, "I'll take it." I say, but before I can, Mikhail has the phone to his ear, grinning.

I roll my eyes, put my hands on my hips and glare at him. When he's done talking I ask, "Who were you speaking with?"

"It shouldn't concern you, cолнышко." He mutters and I narrow my eyes. He walks back to the sink, turning his back to me.

"And why not?" I ask after a moment of silence. I walk closer to him, standing next to him, i dry the dishes with a towel.

"Remember that day? When I saw you, in the woods, at first I thought you were lost, but when I saw you looking at the fire, I knew instantly that you were not.

"Obviously." I mutter, every moment, when I was in that house comes back in my head. Throughout the years, I pushed it to the back of my mind, and Mikhail never confronted me.

"I never talked about it, but how come you were out of the house? Your family died, you were out, like it didn't effect you."

I keep quiet, not wanting to admit that it actually never effected me. When he turns his head to look at me I turn mine down and stare at the glass in my hand.

"It never effected you." He wisperes, eyes wide and takes my chin between his index finger and thumb and turns my face.

"Why?" His voice turns hoarse, like he feels the pain I was supposed to feel and should feel. I take a deep breath and turn away from him. I put the glass and the towel down, rush upstairs to my room and jump on my bed.

Why? Because I was a curse to my parents, I was young, I didn't really understood it back then, but I grew older and thought about it sometimes, I do push it to the back of my head, but sometimes it just floods to my head.

They never adorned me and loved me. I take Christopher in my arms and look at my teddy. My friends say it's stupid, I'm older now, I shouldn't play with teddies and they shouldn't make me feel like I'm loved.

But Christopher does. I place him against my chest and let out a sob, not because I feel guilty about what I did, but because I survived.

Even if my family was still alive, they would still treat me the same way. But Christopher and Mikhail, they are my family now. Christopher can't talk back to me, but he doesn't judge me, he agrees with me.

Okay, now I sound stupid, but that how I feel. Mikhail, I don't tell him about my feelings, but for some reason, I don't even have to because he always knows when I'm sad. He feels it.

My bedroom door opened, and Mikhail walks in, wearing black cotton shorts and a white shirt that says 'f**k you'. I frown and then let out a laugh.

I got this shirt for him last Christmas, because I was angry for taking away my phone. He walks closer to my bed and takes a seat on the edge.

I let go of Christopher and wrap my hands around Mikhail.

He does the same and soon we're cuddled on my bed, laughing about funny memories. When we both calm down from the laughter we stare at each other, suddenly it gets awkward, and I feel a tingling sensation in my chest.

I look away and get up, walking to my bedroom window that's facing the pool downstairs. I turn to look back at him and say, "What if I jump from here into the pool?"

A horrified expression takes place on his face and I grin. Opening the window I peak my head outside and try climbing out onto the roof. I'm almost standing on the roof when a hand around my waist pulls me back in.

"Are you crazy, Cathy?" He barks, and I grin. I love scaring him like this. For some reason I do this when I want to feel safe and loved. It's something I got used to doing. Even though I know it's hilarious I keep doing it.

"Don't worry, fifone." I tease and take one of my pillows and throw it his way.

"Oh, you want to play? Let's play." He says in his playful tone that has me squealing.