EMPTY SOULS

A BEGINNING

How does life work when you fall in love? Someone asked me this when I was 14! And I didn't really have an answer as for me the only love I knew at that time was the love for my family and not the lusty love people fall in these days.

After passing out my SSC examinations and finishing up the hunt of finding a well named college, I started a new life where people used each other on the basis of time and their temporary needs.

Well talking about me, I don't really understand myself too at times so it would be difficult to introduce myself. But, the basic information I can provide is my name. And, my name is Wajiha. I was living in my own bubble and was purely in love with my own-self until 5 February 2015. I clearly remember the incident which took place in my life and woke me up from the sleep, bursting the bubble. That's exactly the day from when I started understanding this modern world and why you got to be away from love! ‘Love can break your life or love can make your life’ maybe even you've heard it too. But, usually it breaks your life so it should rather be 'Beware of love’. When I entered the premises of my college my intention was to make new friends and explore as much as I could,being in my limits. 

Basically I was an introvert. It was hard for me to open up to people I don't know but, I always gave my hundred percent in acting normal and being formal. 

College days started becoming comfortable as I made new bonds, I had five friends with myself now ,and was happy for having my girl gang!

We never interacted with our seniors, because we never had the need to but, unfortunately, one day the students of 1st year had this wonderful project of conducting an interview of any of their seniors. Kudos to my luck! Every acquaintance of mine had some or the other senior as an option and in the known boundary,unlike me. I thought about it for a while until my mind decided to get going and start interacting with some or the other senior as this is just a matter of an interview. Tensed, worried, nervous, I was heading towards the first floor of my college when I suddenly barged into someone and the person was so strong, that it took time for me to figure out what actually happened cause after the banging of my head with his chest the whole world seemed shaky. He didn't even utter a Sorry, neither did I. Because, he was the one at fault. He just ignored everything and moved ahead, so did I. I wonder if he even looked at my face or just stood there in one stationary position. Weird, I thought and continued with my work. All my seniors were rude except the one whom I barged into. Yes, I found out that he was one of my seniors after entering some of the classes. He was super rude! And after one full unsuccessful attempt I returned to my respective classroom and narrated the whole problem plus the incident and how rudely things seemed from my point of view to my girl gang. After one whole-hearted laugh and some expected giggles they suggested me to consult any lecturer,but I thought it would spoil my picture and my impression too. I waited for one day but still no one was sweet enough to let me conduct their interview. And that day during the lunch hour when,six of us friends were having our lunch,the super rude boy appeared to me and I readily showed my friends as,they too seemed excited to know who really it was!

Everyone’s jaw dropped in disbelief, in happiness or in confusion I didn't know but, their reaction was priceless. I started laughing badly until they shut my mouth and started speaking about this boy #super rude! They told me that his name is Aleem. The stud of our college. Every girl wanted to date him and he thinks he is out of every one’s league. I found it overstated because, the very first time I looked at him he didn't seem to be that handsome. I told my friends that I have seen boys who are even more dashing and smarter than him and I didn't find him handsome in any way. Rasheequa, one of my friend told me that you have a weak eyesight and need to go for an urgent check up while , others heartily laughed. When I was convincing them that I wasn't kidding Rasheequa dared me to interview that boy and prove myself. At that moment I told a yes with pride and made some not-going- to- happen plans. 

I didn't have any idea of how badly I was going to be insulted but, as far as I have observed him, he avoided every girl’s gaze. Weird, weird! The very next day, the moment we got the free hour, I decided to start convincing him and complete the dare! 

I actually felt nervous at the very first instinct but gathered the courage to start a formal conversation. “Hello, hi! I'm your junior. Can you do me a small favour please? It's all related to our studies”. I continued but, he remained silent all the while. “I'm supposed to conduct an interview of my senior. I barely know anyone of you all and within a short period of time we got to submit our projects. Could you please help me out?”

Is he lifeless or dumb I wondered as it took him 15 minutes to think and at last he murmured something to himself. Is he mentally retarded I thought. “But why me?” He asked in a rude tone. I wanted to laugh, for being that suspicious. “no particular reason but, it would be a great help and me being an introvert I would end up with the miseries of interactions.” I answered.

“Okay!” He said it in a rude tone again...and,it felt like a victory. Couldn't he smile a bit as it wouldn't cost him a million? But, I thanked him and asked him when he would be available for an interview and left from the awkward section of his class.

My friends couldn't actually believe as they never expected the only crush of our college to accept the formal offer of my non-valuable interview. But, for me it seemed more difficult than wearing heels and acting normal and unaffected. My friends pleaded me to add some personal questions too in his interview but, that would seem creepy I complained. After the preparation of my questions I wiped the sweat arising on my forehead and headed towards the decided place,where I would be conducting an interview of some unknown for the very first time. My friends were super-excited. so they decided to secretly watch us, sorry! they wanted to secretly watch him, as they treated him and imagined him as Mr.perfect, as for me he was just Mr.rude! 

He was seated in the cafeteria of our college and I went and formally wished him good afternoon. And as usual Mr.rude asked me to start with my interview and ordered to finish it up within 5 minutes rather than wishing me back. He always avoided my gaze yet, I stared at him shamelessly. 

I placed my first question which was, what are your duties towards your juniors as a human? He seemed quite different all through his interview and after all my study related questions in the interview when, I thanked him for sparing his precious time for the sake of my project he started to laugh heart-fully, showing his teeth. I never saw him that way before. It took him 6 minutes 45 seconds to come back to normal position and surprisingly he spoke without any need this time. “ I really never expected these kinda study related questions in an interview which you conducted. You haven't even asked me for my name. Normally, people ask about my girlfriends or about my weird behaviour. You seemed to be joking me when you asked for my duties towards a junior. But, let me tell you it's all okay. It's better to be like ‘you’, your ownself and I respect people who respect their ownselves and don't trynna interfere in people's lives. And it was nice meeting you, someone who isn't indifferent. Okay! I'll get going then. Bye!” he said and went back to his class. I actually wanted to give him an applaud for the kind off answers he has given all through his interview but, my mind never accepted positive comments towards him. And I actually conducted an interview crossing the limits of introvercy. I understood he wasn't actually as rude as he showcased. There's something more to him than, just being a chocolate boy of our college. 

I did not meet him or even had a chance to look at him for nearly 5 to 6 days and I didn't know why? But, I felt like crossing the levels of introvercy again and take a step forward, explore more and make many more new friends and Aleem stood no.1 in the list of friends-to- make. I wasn't that happy that I completed a dare but I was even more happier for finding out a fact that even Aleem was an introvert and wasn't as weird as I thought. 

And while I was busy giving some final touches to my million dollar project, Aleem appeared to me and the surprise of the day for me was his smile. He slightly smiled. Yes, he smiled at me! Is it the first step towards friendship? Or was he being formal? But,with 99 different thoughts in my mind, I smiled back at him but unlike him I gave a 100% real smile.