The Circle of Friends, Book IV...Mike

I Guilty Heart Pulling up outside the complex, Mike located a parking spot in front of their apartment. Carefully angling his Camry between the lines, he stopped just short of striking the curb and turned off the engine. Mike reached for his gym bag and with great effort, climbed out of the vehicle. The air felt cool on his skin and the dark, overcast sky mirrored his sullen mood. Football practice had exhausted him today. Drills had drained every last ounce of energy, and Mike’s weary limbs moved sluggish. His roommate, Matt, had bounded out of the locker room before Mike even dressed. Since he’d not been talkative today, he suspected his friend desired better company. Outside of feeling tired, though, he could not pinpoint the exact cause of his depressing melancholy. Mike just could not muster a smile today. With heavy steps, he plodded up the stairs to their apartment. When he reached the landing, Mike glanced down into the parking lot, searching for his roommate’s car. Matt’s Eclipse was absent, but he spied Sarah’s red convertible behind a large SUV. Perhaps his friend’s wife had sent Matt out on an errand. Opening the front door, Mike called out for his roommates. No one answered his greetings, only empty silence, and he sighed. Despite his despondency, Mike had hoped for a cheery welcome home and the empty apartment disappointed him. Locking the door, he trudged toward his bedroom. The living room sat in total order and Mike resisted the urge to drop his bag by the big screen television. The kitchen appeared dark and empty, with no enticing smells wafting his direction, which meant Sarah had not cooked a meal tonight. Feeling hungry but dejected, he decided to work on an assignment and worry about dinner later. In his final semester at Georgia Tech, Mike had felt weighted and downcast as of late. Endless hours Mike had poured into his studies, pushing his mind and body to the brink of exhaustion on many occasions, but school was not the source of his despondency. He continued to excel in every class and felt confident of receiving his degree in December. He did not believe football to be the cause of his stress, either. Even after years of drills and practices in full pads, Mike still loved the sport and enjoyed the camaraderie of his teammates. Lacking the urge, not to mention exceptional skill to play professionally, he had no regrets that his career would end at the college level. Matt would pursue a career in the NFL, but Mike felt satisfied with his efforts of the past five seasons. As far as he could tell, neither football nor school caused his current unrest. Entering his bedroom, Mike turned on the light and tossed his bag on the bed. Moving to his desk, he turned on his computer and kicked off his shoes. While waiting for the system to come online, Mike stared at the picture atop his computer hutch. The framed photo had been a gift of appreciation from Matt and Sarah. The couple’s happy smiles reflected their beautiful wedding held over a year ago. He still remembered when they’d begun dating at the end of their freshman year of college. They even lived together a year before committing to marriage. Mike had felt relieved Matt and Sarah made their union permanent before God, spending endless hours encouraging his roommate to that end. Those who knew Matt had doubted he would give up his single status so easy, not after his promiscuous first year at Georgia Tech. Matt excelled when it came to possessing charm and charisma, and had only to flash his contagious grin to attract women. Mike had understood his friend’s heart, though. Sarah was exactly who Matt required and needed, and she completed him in every possible manner. What Mike had not anticipated was the strength of his own feelings for his roommate’s wife, though. It had become a continuous battle to suppress his desires and urges. Mike cleared his thoughts and focused on reading his emails. He noticed a message from his mother, reminding him that his sister’s birthday approached. A gift had been mailed out yesterday, but Mike felt he should give Angel a phone call and wish her happy birthday. Her birthday was not until Friday, but he suspected his youngest sister would be out for the night. If he wanted to do more than a message, he needed to call today. Digging through his bag, Mike located his cell phone in a side pocket and dialed Angel’s number. After two rings, Mike wondered if he would have to leave a message tonight, but his sister answered. “Hey,” she said, her voice full of disappointment. “Hey, Sis,” Mike said. “Thought you were Brandon,” she grumbled. “Sorry,” he said, keeping the sarcasm to a minimum. Mike knew that tone all too well and wanted to avoid a confrontation with his baby sister. “What’s up, Mike?” “Wanted to wish you a happy birthday.” “Thanks, but it’s not until tomorrow.” “I know, but figured you’d be out,” said Mike, stretching out across his bed. “Did my gift arrive?” “No,” Angel stated. “It’ll probably come tomorrow.” “Better!” Mike drew a deep breath and ran his fingers through his curly locks. Angel could be so difficult sometimes, and her attitude became worse with every passing year. How she’d morphed into the complete opposite of his oldest sister, Mike would never understand. All three had developed different personalities, but Angel’s negative attitude reflected a sharp contrast to her sibling’s upbeat natures. He got along quite well with Mary, but his baby sister was another matter entirely. She excelled at acting the thorn in everyone’s side and did not live up to her heavenly name. “So, what are you doing for your birthday?” Mike said, determined not to let her get the best of him. “I was supposed to go out with Brandon,” she spat. “Oh, did you two break up?” “No, he’s just being a jerk!” Angel growled. “We had a fight last night and I’m waiting for him to call and apologize. It was his fault!” I doubt that, Mike thought. “Well, if he doesn’t, maybe you should call him instead.” “Me call first?” she demanded. “Yeah, you know, just to break the ice.” “Is my big brother trying to give me dating advice? Oh, please! I bet you don’t even have a girlfriend.” “Well, not right now I don’t,” began Mike, plucking at the corner of his pillow. “When do you ever? God, Mike, you don’t know anything about love!” Angel said. “Anyway, I gotta go. Brandon might be calling. I’ll send you a message when your gift arrives. Bye!” Mike turned off his cell phone and tossed it aside. Rubbing his eyes, Mike sat upright and scanned his room. There were clothes lying by the dresser, most dirty and in need of a wash, and one drawer sat ajar, a sock dangling over the edge. However, the surface of the dresser remained clean and uncluttered. Mike did not covet possessions, and the walls of his room reflected that propensity. Outside of a poster of the Atlanta Falcon’s stadium and a framed newspaper featuring his high school football team, Mike’s walls were as empty as his current existence. His gaze shifted to a picture frame on his nightstand. A larger version of the photo hung in the dining area and depicted Mike with his two roommates. Dwarfed by the stature of two football players, Sarah stood tall between the men, their arms locked with one another. Taken during his roommate’s wedding, Mike could still hear Sarah’s voice as she proclaimed the photo to be of her and two guys she cleaned up after, a true enough statement. Matt’s wife had looked after the men and kept the apartment organized since her arrival over two years ago. While he appreciated her endless efforts, especially when it came to his laundry, Mike wished it involved more than cooking and cleaning. “I do know something about love,” he muttered to himself, aggravated that Angel’s words had gotten under his skin. Determined to drive the matter from his mind, Mike returned to his computer and began working on his assignments. He had not been studying for long when his roommates returned. The sound of Sarah’s delightful laughter echoed in the quiet apartment. Leaning away from the monitor, Mike peered out his open door just as Matt and Sarah moved into view. They stepped into the kitchen, several bags in hand, and deposited their load on the dining table. Even before he caught the logo on the side of the bags, the aroma of chicken filled Mike’s room. Almost on cue, he felt his stomach rumble. Matt glanced his direction and grinned when his eyes met Mike’s. “You hungry?” he called. “Always!” Mike said. He joined his roommates in the kitchen. Matt set several boxes of chicken on the table while Sarah retrieved plates from the cupboard, her long, dark hair swaying as she reached for the second shelf. Mike assisted her with the task, taking the plates from her hands. Setting them on the table, he inhaled the aroma and reached for a box. “Hey, thanks, guys,” he said. “There are ten pieces of chicken,” Sarah informed him, fixing Mike with a motherly stare. “I’d better get at least two of them!” Matt shot Mike a mischievous grin. “I don’t think I can survive on just four pieces!” “I won’t eat them all, Sarah,” Mike promised, noting the large containers of mashed potatoes, coleslaw and potato wedges on the table. Rooming with the men had taught Sarah to purchase extra food after viewing how much he and Matt could consume in just one sitting. Judging from the spread on the table, there would be more than enough tonight. Sarah handed her husband a plate and presented Matt with a similar order. With her long, dark hair and cat-like green eyes, she could conjure up quite a threatening expression. Sarah also possessed a quick tongue and could be rather brusque at times with her words. Mike appreciated her bluntness, preferring a direct answer rather than the mind games played by most girls. He also admired how well she handled herself in the presence of two roommates who never took anything serious. Matt enjoyed teasing his wife, often trying her patience, but Mike felt too much respect for Sarah to taunt her without reason. Much of that stemmed from his feelings toward Matt’s wife, although he worked hard to keep his true motivation a secret. Sarah did not need to view his kindness as anything but brotherly affection. Mike joined his friends in front of the television, enjoying some mindless stimulation while devouring his food. Careful to eat only his allotted pieces of chicken, he even permitted Sarah to steal his second biscuit. He did not linger after dinner though, and returned to the assignment waiting by his computer. With headphones in place and music pounding in his ears, Mike tackled his science report with as much enthusiasm as he could muster. Absorbed with his schoolwork, Mike jumped when a hand touched his shoulder. He glanced up into Sarah’s startled face and removed the headphones at once. “Sorry about that,” Sarah laughed. “But I doubt you heard me over your music.” “Gosh no, I didn’t,” Mike said. Her eyes were bright with amusement. “I’m making a sundae for Matt. You want one, too?” “Thanks, I’d love one!” Saving the report over which he’d spent the last two hours laboring, Mike followed Sarah into the kitchen. The carton of ice cream sat on the counter beside a bottle of chocolate and three empty bowls. His mouth watering in anticipation, Mike watched as Sarah scooped ice cream into the waiting bowls. She poured generous amounts of chocolate syrup on each pile, all but covering the ice cream in sugary goo. While she searched for the final ingredient, Matt joined them in the kitchen. “That looks good, girl!” he proclaimed, eyeing the sundaes. Producing a can of whipped cream from the refrigerator, Sarah added one more layer of sugar to the sundae. It spluttered on the last bowl and she gave the can a hard shake. “Damn, I think it’s empty!” she said.