Damaged

New Beginnings

Jessica's POV:

         I was pushed out of the room and joined David after handing the nurse a clipboard. We left the hospital  making our way to the car. The nurse stopped and just waited. Still clinging to Daniel’s hand I was almost pulled off the chair because he kept walking. He looked towards me and realized I was stopped.  

      We waited and David pulled the car around. And both men helped me into the backseat and Daniel sat in the back with me because I refused to let go of his hand. I buckled myself in and we drove from the hospital. It was about three o’clock in the morning. Nothing was really open, so David stopped at a convenience store and gas station. On our way through town. My stomach growled happily as if it knew it was getting fed. 

      “Is there anything in particular you want to eat?” He asked me and I looked surprised that he was actually asking me. I pulled my phone out and one handedly typed sandwich and chips. I showed it to him and he smiled. 

      “Coming right up.” He got out and ran into the store. We could see him walking around trying to find what I was asking for. It was silent in the car, but I felt my hand being squeezed just a little. I look at Daniel, who was smiling at me. Then he put his left hand on the top of my head. My face blushed a little and my eyes averted his. 

      The sound of the car door opening and a cold breeze blowing into the car. We both looked to see David with a bag and handed it to me. I held the bag and wanted to wait to eat it when we get to my new home for a couple years. But David and Daniel stared at me not moving and we weren’t going anywhere. I let go of Daniel’s hand finally and rummaged into the bag. I took out a tuna sandwich and opened it. 

       I didn’t realize how hungry I actually was. David started driving. I was wolfing down the sandwich. I pulled out a water and drank it because my mouth was dry. I opened the bag of chips and just was literally pigging out I was so hungry.  

      Once done I stuffed the garbage into the bag and tied it tightly. I felt full now, that I was starting to feel drowsy. I kept dozing off and on, but because I may have a concussion I know I shouldn’t try to sleep, but it was so hard when my stomach has food in it. 

      “Make sure she doesn’t fall asleep,” David ordered Daniel. Daniel grabbed my hand again and the shock woke me right up. I went stiff for a moment, but relaxed instantly. I knew that I was now too embarrassed to sleep though. It was going to be hard because Daniel’s hand was warm, but I felt his big, rough hand holding mine. It felt rough, but I could feel his gentleness of which, then I knew he was a good person.  

      We started to slow down and I could see the blinker to turn left onto a road which had a natural arch because the trees were shaped that way. It was really dark though and you couldn't even see moonlight spill in between the trees. It was a rough ride about a mile in. 

     We reached the end and it was bright with moonlight. The soft glow of moonlight hit a couple of cars and a very big home. It looked like a mansion it was huge. It was a large rectangular building upright. Many windows were illuminated with light spilling out making shadows along the ground. You could see shadows of people in the windows walking by. 

      It looked to be an old building, yet there looked to be new features on the house. Part of the structure looked like it was rebuilt. But what really caught my eye was a tower that sprouted from the roof. It was wider than most taking up half of the roof itself. But no light came from it and I felt a chill run through my body just looking at it.   

      The porch looked rebuilt, but it looked like it was still part of the original building, just replaced the wood and a new paint job and tiling on the roof. 

     This building itself enchanted me. Telling me to come inside and make myself at home. Like it used to be some kind of inn or something. I just stared at it with my mouth slightly open taking it all in. Daniel noticed me staring at the building and chuckled.  

       “You like it?” I nodded in response. “This is where you’ll be living with us. It used to be a small hotel. It’s got a pool house and other stuff in the back. We’ll give you the tour another time, but for now you should meet the rest of the house.” He said opening the door and the cool night air hitting me. Good thing I’m still wearing the hoodie or I would be cold.

       Holding my hand still he slowly moved out of the car pulling me out with him. He helped me out and David came to the other side of me and both men helped me up the porch and I admired the iron banisters. Black yet intricate and beautiful with swirls and also leaves and black roses. The door still had the original knocker. It was pretty old looking yet it was well taken care of.

      David turned the doorknob and pushed open the door without making a sound. We walked in and Daniel called out.  

     “We’re home,” he called without really yelling. It surprised me because I would’ve thought you should say it louder so they can hear you, but I heard footsteps running and people talking excitedly. I stiffened and felt extremely nervous. Daniel gave my hand an encouraging squeeze. It made me blush pink. 

       We were in a hallway that was pretty long. Halfway down the hallway to the left was an opening and I saw a step so they must be stairs going to the first level. Then someone with curly, golden blonde hair peaked around the corner. His deep blue eyes peered at me curiously. He smiled. His baby face lit up brightly just seeing me.  

       “Jessica,” he stated coming out striding over to us. He stood in front of us and he noticed a bandage on my forehead. A pained look crossed his face. “What happened here?” He asked seriously.  

       “I’ll tell you later,” David replied curtly. 

       He smiled sadly at me and put his hand at the top of my head. He was pitying me and it just made my feelings worse. I already wanted to cry, but I didn’t realize a tear slipped and he looked shocked.  

       “You made her cry,” a deep voice stated behind him. “You’re always like this. You get excited and then you look at someone with that look and boom instant tears.” The man spoke again. He was leaning against the wall behind him. He seemed to be studying the situation. His golden brown eyes and black, straight hair that went down to above his ass. His nose rounded at the end. His lips pursed.

      He is pretty tall. Actually all of them except Jeremy were all tall. You could also tell they have muscle including Jeremy. How is it that they are all very muscular? I’m in trouble because my cousin would yell at me for not telling her I live in this house with these men. She has a weak spot for muscular men. She would already be hitting on them. 

      I haven’t heard from her since auntie disappeared with her. I can’t believe this happened though, but I hope auntie is not letting Him anywhere near her. She is too blind to his actions and He is probably lying to her.  

     I felt the depression setting in, not realizing more people were there now and an argument broke out between the two men I just met. I caught into it after stopping thinking about my cousin Jaime.

      “The blonde is Charlie and the other guy with a straight face is Jonathan. We call him Johnny though. He acts like a tough guy, but he’s got a good heart.” Daniel whispered to me in my ear. I can see why though. The names suit them. 

     I watched them argue over this, but I felt warm here. Though some of the girls on the side looked at Daniel’s and my hand clasped together and I could see jealousy fill their eyes. It scared me to be honest. There were about four girls and five boys. They all looked at me as if I was a nuisance to them. That’s when the unwelcome feeling set in. To the five men I’m more than welcome but the teenagers just looked at me in anger. I cringed just thinking about what they might do to me if I’m left alone with them.

      Unlike my cousin I’m prone to be bullied and I’m an easy target for it. I’m too soft hearted is what my mom would say to me. But it’s not a bad thing. I’ve always been weak and I know that, but my mom said to me.

     “Jessica even though you seem weak you do have your strong points. But I don’t see a weak girl, I see a strong girl who just wants to be surrounded by love and to protect the ones you love.” After that I had thought I was, but in reality I wasn’t. 

      Charlie stood in front of me looking apologetic. I didn’t realize I had started crying and everybody was looking at me shocked. 

      “I’m sorry we made you cry,” he wiped my tears away. I shook my head and wiped the tears on the sleeve of the hoodie. I grabbed my phone and did the best I could to type with one hand what I wanted to convey to them. I handed the phone to David when I was finished.  

      “It wasn’t you that made me cry. It was the warmth I feel being around you all. It made me remember something that was very encouraging to me. I’m sorry if it seemed like you were the cause.” David read aloud and even his voice cracked a little. Daniel gave my hand a squeeze. Charlie gave me the happiest smile ever. Johnny closed his eyes as he was leaning against the wall his arms folded across his chest, but a smile crossed his face. My words made them happy.  

      Behind us the door opened and it was Jeremy. Everybody turned to look at him and he seemed confused by everyone’s smiles. Well except for all the teenagers in the house.  

     “What’s going on here?” He asked.  

     “Here,” Daniel handed him my phone and Jeremy read it to himself and looked at me shocked, but then he smiled softly. He typed in my phone underneath and handed to me that nobody saw. I read it quickly without anyone seeing it.  

       “Are you glad that I came to visit you when I did?” I blushed and nodded.  

       Let me explain. Jeremy had come to Vermont with David and came and visited me in the foster home. I was in a really bad place. I was in so much pain that I couldn’t handle it, but also in the home I was in I was being bullied.    

      I had planned that night I was going to commit suicide while everyone was sleeping. I was going to take a whole bottle of pain medication. Over the counter because you can overdose on that too. 

      That day I was in my assigned room just reading. I shared a room with one of my bullies. It was a living nightmare. 

      My foster mother walked into my room looking at me aggravated. She hated the fact that I couldn’t speak, so she didn’t like me at all and wasn’t afraid to show it.   

      “You’ve got a visitor,” She snarled and left me alone. I grabbed my phone and went downstairs into the dining room where a red headed man sat. He caught sight of me and he looked a little shocked, but he smiled and his deep emerald green eyes held mine. I was shocked that he smiled at me. I didn’t think there would be anyone who would be happy to see me. 

      I moved into the dining room and sat in the chair across from him. I didn’t even know him but he seemed to know me. 

     “Hello Jessica, my name is Jeremy. I am one of your mom’s friends,” he introduced himself. I looked away from him not answering. But he kept his smile up. 

      “I know you probably didn’t think one of us would come visit you, but I feel like I had to come see how you are doing.” Silence filled the space. 

     We just sat in silence for a bit, but then he got up and came around the table and sat in a chair next to me. I didn’t look straight at him. I clasped my hands together and looked down at the table. 

     I feel so useless. This man comes to see me yet I refuse to even look him in the eyes. I felt touched, but is it enough to keep living on? I just want to end it all now just so I’m not a burden to people. I don’t want to be a burden and cause problems for my new guardians with Him. 

     Maybe the only way to stop Him is to destroy myself. I don’t want to, but I can’t deal with burdening anyone and this pain is too much. I can’t handle it anymore. 

     My hands felt warm. I looked to find his hand on mine. His gentle yet strong hand felt so warm and welcoming.  

     “I know you’re ignoring me, but I want to say something. It’s not going to make it any better giving up. She wants you to live on and become happy. She made sure you have a home to come to. Where you’ll be safe. Jessica, we will be there for you for anything you want to talk about. We will be the shoulder you can cry on. But don’t look so defeated.” Shock spread through my whole body. He cares about me? The rest of them care about me? Will I really be safe with them? Do I really want to give up on life?  

      “Your mother told us about you. She told us that you are the most kind hearted girl she ever raised. She really didn’t want any of us meeting you, but she was always talking about you and showing us pictures of you. She did tell me something that to this day I can’t help but wonder about. She told me that when the time comes she thinks you would be strong enough to handle it,” he stopped. I knew what she meant. The pain seeped into my face. My heart started to hurt. With every beat the cuts bled and hurt. I don’t think I’m strong enough.

     “Jessica, I know your pain is excruciating, but what does your mother want for you to do?” His question caught me off guard. My mind turned to the day. Her words whispering in my mind. 

     “Jessica please live.” It burned into my brain and I didn’t realize I had started to cry. My vision blurred. His left hand went to the back of my head stroking my hair as I cried. He pulled my head to his shoulder and just let me cry.    

     “The people that you’ll be living with may look rough or weird or even scary, but all of them have the kindest of hearts. I don’t know about the teenagers that live under us, but you’ll be safe.” He said as I silently cried. 

     He let me just cry. I clutched his shirt in my fist as the tears flowed. He just stroked my hair and talked about the place where I’ll be living. 

     “You are one of us now,” he smiled at me as I finished crying and wiped the tears from my face. I felt a little better. He was so nice and so gentle it made me a little happy. 

      I looked at him as he stood there in front of me remembering that day. That day he reminded me that I do have a home and a family waiting for me. People who care about me. He was so gentle towards me and he cares about me. 

     His smile and everyone else’s pierces my heart letting the warmth spread. I felt their kindness and happiness and the warmth filled me with happiness. I started to tear up again. But these are happy tears.  

    This place is where my wounds can heal. Where I can feel cared for. These people give me that hope. I know it sounds sappy, but it’s how I truly feel.   

    “Let’s get you to your room. Your stuff was sent and we’ve managed to get all into your room,” Daniel smiled. I nodded my head and followed Daniel. Everybody had dispersed except the five men. One had my bag, the other had my purse, but they all followed us up the stairs David and Daniel helped me because I was still a little weak and my legs may give out.