BLAMELESS SORROWS

76. New challenges.

Axel's Point of View.

I went back home, my heart racing in anxiety, doubt and fear.

But as I enter the door of my home, I swallowed evrything I was feeling and went in for I know today it cannot be about anything else but Grandpa and nothing else.

We have enough problem as it is, we can't go beyond that.

But when I went in, unlike what I had hope for, our home is easily silent. No sign of Uncle Jo or Tilbe anywhere.

Where are they?

I was about to go look for them, but that is when my room's door open with a creak, making me look that way and Karina was there.

So I went towards her first.

Axel: By any chance do you know where Tilbe and Uncle Jo are?

Karina: Uncle Jo went out since he need to go see some elders out while Tilbe is currently sleeping in her room.

My mouth form an Oh.

Axel: Will you mind if I go check on Tilbe first and then come back?

She squint her face in an uncomfortable manner when I said that.

Karina: Well Iam fine with it, but Vann is here and you have some problems with meeting others so, I think it might be a problem.

Vann is here too? I didn't think he will be here since no one is usually here, but Iam relived that he is here. At least with him here, Tilbe will feel a bit more at ease.

Karina: Oh wait! I was suppose to say this first, Tilbe was running on fever so..

Wait what, Tilbe was sick? I quickly ran towards her room worried about her condition. I get to her room and went inside, and found her sleeping peacefully by her bed but her complexion is quite pale and she look so tired and worn out.

I sigh in relieve, at least she seems alright for now. And then I feel a presence, that is Vann sitting besides her bed. He must be here to treat little gift.

Axel: Is she okay? Anything wrong?

Before he can answer Karina also get in and said quickly.

Karina: Tilbe was running on fever, but Vann came and have treat her so she is alright. That should have been the first thing I said.

She said so regretfully while I sigh in relief as she said that. That means Little gift is fine.

Axel: Vann, is there something to worry about?

Vann: I treat her not too long ago so she shall be fine now, she is just sleeping cause of exhaustion and nothing else, don't worry about it.

I nod in understanding while patting little gift hair softly. I quickly give a kiss on her forehead.

Axel: Please be with her a little but more, I will be back in a while. I need to take care of something with Karina.

Vann nod in a yes as I said that.

Vann: Take your time.

With that I went out with Karina and we went inside my room.

Axel: Thank you for doing this favour for me. Now you can just return the Tama to me. It must have been a hastle.

She sat down by my bed while looking at me intendly as she sit so making me look at her in confusion.

Axel: Anything?

She nod in a no as I said that and pat the space besides her asking me to sit down.

Karina: You seems so tired and look like you will cry any second now.

I know I look horrible right now. I probably look haggard and completely messed up.

Axel: I know. I might cry any moment now, so please leave me alone for today.

She smile at me sadly as I said that.

Karina: Crying to oneself is quite sad actually. So why don't you lend my shoulder or presence for today?

I must look like complete crap considering two stranger have offer me to cry just by looking at me.

Axel: I will really like to take on that offer but my tears seems to have dried up by now.

She shrug as I said that, as if saying that, it cannot be help then.

While I sigh to myself. It is really like I don't know what to do now.

What to I do so that Tilbe can feel a bit better, what can I do so that we can go back to how we are before or so taht we can move on from this mourning.

I know that Tilbe is sick right now because of all the crying that she did, which must have taken a toll on her body. And moreover all the emotional exhaustion won't have done any good either.

I know I need to do something so that I can atleast comfort her when she need it the most, but right now It seems like Iam too tired to even think of a way. It feels like I myself will fall at this rate, forget about taking care of someone else.

And besides, no one know but I may have commit the gravest sin I can know of today. And that scared and terrified me, but it seems even for that I can do nothing about it.

Karina: A penny for your thought?

I look up at her, for a moment there I didn't even realise Iam with someone right now.

Axel: Iam just quite worried about Tilbe. I knew it won't be easy for her from the beginning but now that it really has happened, I don't know what to do to make her feel even a little better.

I sigh as I said that while she look at me with I understanding.

Karina: Just let her be, let her mourn for as long as she want. Cause mourning and crying to your heart contend is the easiest way to be true to yourself at such times. And bottling up all kind of emotions will just do you bad and nothing else.

I know right, I should let her do that. But it is such a shame that her body won't even allow her to mourn as she please.

Axel: I really pray that at least she could be a little healthier.

When I said that rather than looking at me in understanding again, she look at me in somewhat of a guilty manner.

Axel: And you seems to have something to say to me right?

She sigh as I said that.

Karina: I think I have to stay here for a bit longer?

I look at her confused as she said that.

Axel: Why? Did something happen back home?

I know I can help at pretty much nothing, but if she is in trouble at least I can lend my ears to her. Although Iam not sure if i can do even that at my condition.

Karina: Listen to me calmly and you cannot be rushed like before. You will wake up Tilbe that way and Vann said she need all the rest she can get at the moment.

I nod hesitantly as she said so, I have a bad feeling about this.

Karina: Well Tilbe is sick.

I raised by eyebrows at that.

Is she sick?

Axel: I think I know that.

I look at her confusedly while nod as if everything is making sense for her.

Karina: Well she is still sick.

I look at her confused.

Tilbe is sick so she is resting, and I have seen that myself. Where is she going with this now?

Axel: Umm please just tell me outwardly, what it is that you are trying to tell me.

She twitch about a bit uncomfortable as I said that.

Karina: Well you know how Vann said he have healed her and everything?

I nod in a yes as she said that. Still confuse where this is going.

Karina: Well he have done taht twice in the past few hours.

I look at her more confused. How come he need to heal her twice. I stand up shock at the realisation.

Axel: Did Little gift get hurt other than being sick?

She shuss me as I was kind of loud, and pull me to sit down.

Karina: You promise not to freak out.

Axel: How can I when it concern Tilbe health, and when did I promise.

Karina: Whatever but no, Tilbe didn't get hurt or anything like that happen.

Oh!

Axel: Then?

Karina: We are not really sure what happen, but she was running a fever when she get back so Uncle Jo call Vann in and he healed her and she fell asleep.

I nod as she said taht, seriously many bad feelings are coming up at the moment.

Karina: Well we don't really understand why but she slept for around half an hour and then wake up running a higher fever and her body aching all over.

And now there is the bad news.

What is happening?

Why isn't Tilbe healing like she usually does. I mean someone that Vann have heal, might it be a disease or a wound or whatever. It does not just reoccur like that. No one just get sick again like that, and one cannot.

Axel: I heard it right when you said, you guys don't know why right?

She nod in a yes as I said that.

Karina: Vann is looking for way to figure out what is happening, and is anything is wrong with his energy but that does not seem to be so, cause nothing has change in his energy as much as Iam concern.

Axel: So it is likely that, it has something to do with Tilbe right?

She slowly nod in a no, while I grit my teeth as tight as I can trying to contain all the overwhelming emotion I feel at the moment.

And now that the subject is brought up, even the last time, her sickness reoccur which is not suppose to happen.

Why is such things happening now of all time. She is going through so much and the only things we can help with is getting rid of her physical pain but now even that we cannot do.

Karina: Something might have went wrong the first time, but Iam sure this time it should be alright. And besides even if its not, we will find a way so don't worry too much.

I want to shout at everything at the moment, I want to complain at anyone and be angry at all that is happening. But I know no one is fault for what happen and there is no one I can blame for.

So I calm myself down as much as I can and tried to think rationally.

Axel: Then the reason why you could not go home is because, you have a feeling that containing my Tama will be needed for a longer time.

She slowly nod once more, her expression sympathetic and compliance.

Karina: It will be better if we see what will happen first. And besides you do have a room for a small person like me in this huge house right?

I don't think we have a huge house like she speak of, but what do I know.

Axel: One you are not small and two I though we agree on you not meeting anyone while you have my Tama no?

She just plop down at my bed as I said that and act asleep, making me sigh in disbeleive. She will really get along quite well with Little gift, they are quite alike at some strange way.