BLAMELESS SORROWS

27. Bigger remembrance.

Axel's Point of View.

I went and prepare a light dinner for us while she slept peacefully in my room.

I cook us some mushroom the way she like it, and boil the vegetable in a bland way with only salt in it and make us a bit spicy salad to blend everything in.

After Iam done and also finished setting up the whole table, and seeing as Little gift has not come down yet. Actually it's around 9 in the night by now, I went once before to wake her but seeing as she was sleeping so peacefully, I decide to let her be for a while but now she need to eat.

I went to my room to check on her expecting her to be sleeping peacefully like I have leave her before I went, but only to find myself so wrong.

I went in the room to wake her up but I saw her struggling in pain, sweat everywhere and wriggling here and there in pain, startling me. I tried to wake her up but she won't bug no matter what I do.

Axel: Hey little gift, please get up. Can you hear me, little gift?

I shake her but her eye just open for a bit, then close again. While she keep on mumbling something which I could not make out.

Axel: Tilbe please respond to me, here try to focus on me.

I tried to wake her up as much as I can, while she tried to grip my hand as much as she can while mumbling.

Tilbe: Some...one. he...r.. some...

I could not make out what she is saying except someone, what is happening. Is her sickness something to do with someone?

I busily look for her phone while clutching her hands at the same time and quickly dail Vann number but he does not pick up making me swear in anger. I tried to find his sister number but it's not under her name so I don't really know which one it is. And to make matter worse, due to my nervousness and anxiety I can't hardly think of anything right now.

I went ahead and dail Vann's number again and again and again but he won't just pick up.

Axel: Hold on just a but, it will be fine soon little gift.

She heave heavily while her breathing become short making me more and more scared.

Tilbe: Someone....

Axel: Someone?

Just then she scream out in pain while crying vehemently, while I stand there not knowing what to do.

So even though my mind is going through a thousand thing in a second by now, and I hardly know what Iam thinking and clarity in long gone by now, I quickly carry her in my arm and rush out.

Fear, rush, anxious but fear is the main thing I feel. The fear that I might lose her, the fear that I might let her down is all I feel.

But like that, while trying to stop myself from thinking of anything I reach the car and quickly get in. I lay her down softly in the backseat while she groan in pain.

I quickly get in the car, my heart beating a thousand beat per second, but giving no heet to it, I quickly start to drive. Which does not go as smoothly as I had hope, cause no matter how much I tried the car won't start.

And beside my shaking hand and my shaking heart does not help one bit.

Unable to do anything and not willing to waste any second more, I quickly get down from the car and open the back door.

I raise Tilbe while she groan in pain again, making me flinch as well.

Axel: Iam sorry, but hold on just for a bit more okay!

Tilbe: A..x, pai..n, painnn.....

I nod, my own sweat clouding my eye as she cries in agony.

Axel: I know, I know. Just a while, we will reach Vann's in just a bit alright? Just hold on for a while...

With that I quickly carry her on my back and run out. I ran and ran, sweats covering me from head to toe, breathing harshly while heaving heavily and like that finally I reach the main palace gate, making me sigh in, a bit relief while also very scared.

I suddenly stop running and just stand still, my mind shouting for me to run telling me I have not much time left anymore, but no matter how much it rush me and ask me to go out, my body won't just move. Its as if, it have its own mind which is not mine to control.

And like that I stand still, rooted by the gate. My breathing completely stop for a moment, all the anxiety gone, all the fear no more. It's as if I can't feel anything anymore. My fear to go out was too much that it made my emotion go numb and my body motionless.

It was not just the fear of me going out and hurting someone anymore at this point, rather it was a habit by now. A habit that Iam not brave enough to break free from.

I have been inside this gate for about a decade now, and now to suddenly go out sound unreal and feel unrealistic, too unrealistic to the point that even if I know I should go out, my body won't co-operate, as if it know that my mind is giving me a weird and crazy command.

While I was in my own world contemplating everything, I heard Tilbe groaning in pain and feel her trying her best to get my attention, her hand although frail trying its best to tug at my shirt. And that put me out of my trance.

Tilbe: bac..k, Ax...... in..side. Let..s go.. back, Ia..m f..ine.

I chuckle at her words and my foolishness, how can I let my little fear get in the way, when I know the thing I cherished the most is on the line.

Axel: You really are bad at lying, little one. Now hold on tight.

And with that once more we start to run. I ran with all my might while Tilbe groan in pain from time to time making me rush more and more, staggering here and there but my only choice is to go faster.

Axel: Hold on, just for a bit. We are nearly there.

Her tears damped my shoulder while her effort to quite her shout of pain scar my arm in light touch, she does not even have the energy to hold on to me.

But thankfully Vann's does not stay far from the palace, also the reason why I know his house is cause their's is the only house within a mile from the palace in the east while in the west are the Coy.

And sure enough within second, we reach their house and I quickly rush through their garden which surround the house.

I rush to the door and with all my might knock on it and more truthfully pound on it.

Axel: Little one, it will be over quickly. Just a moment.

The door finally open after seeming a century long wait. But instead of Vann, it was a girl.

Axel: Vann!

The girl: What?

And then she saw Tilbe on my back, her attention being caught by her groaning in pain.

The girl: Oh my god, Tilbe what is wrong with her? What am I saying, come in quickly.

And she open the door more widely while I quickly go in, while the girl quickly run upstairs shouting for Vann with the loudest of her voice.

I lay Tilbe down softly while she weakly and tiredly open her eyes.

Tilbe: Ill be fi..ne. You can go, Ax. Iam fine.

I chuckled at her words, cause in words she is telling me to go while her hand just hold on to me tighter and tighter.

Axel: Nothing is more important than my little gift, remember? I'll be okay, so dont worry and rest peacefully. I promise, we will go home together after you are all treated and fine.

I tried to smile as much as I can, but my hand shake in fear.

The fact that Iam outside only registering now, the fact that I will come in contact with people and the fact that I will probably hurt them, those thought hit me just now.

Tilbe tug at the small headband she is wearing so I take it out thinking that she is uncomfortable, but she raise it to my eye and I knew what she mean.

Tilbe: Stay by my.. si..de comfort.ably.

I nod my head and with a kiss on her forehead quickly blind fold myself, acting as if the small thin scarf is the thickest blind shade there ever ever was, as if the small cloth is the biggest wall.

I hold on to Tilbe's hand tightly.

And just then I heard loud footstep running down in full speed.

The quickly reach Tilbe and now is standing near me. I can feel their heat on both of my side.

Then I heard a male voice, which must be Vann.

Vann: Oh my god, Tilbe.

And then no more sound come out for a while but I can feel him shuffling around.

And then I heard a female voice and now that I think about it, it must be Heri, Vann's sister.

Heri: Vann, is she fine?

The worries in her voice and the sincerity in the words she spoke warm my heart in a way, I have never felt before.

Heri: Why is she losing her consciousness again, is she alright. Is something wrong?

That caught my attention and I look back in which I think is his direction in total panic. I thought she was fine cause her groans and cries of pain has lessened a bit, but is she getting worse.

Vann: Quite!

I hold my breath after he said that, anxiously waiting for what he will say next and my heart once more picking up the hectic beat it seem to familiarise itself with.

But after it felt like years, I heard a sigh Vann finally speak up.

Vann: She is fine now.

Both Heri and me sigh a huge sigh of relief. Thank god, now I finally feel like Iam finally breathing again.

Heri: What's wrong? why is she sick like this? And why is not gaining her consciousness yet?

Curiosity is also killing me here.

Vann: I don't exactly know what is wrong and what cause this much pain but it seems that an old would or something of that sort open up again, making it hurt for her and her temperature going hayward. But what the wound was and how it can cause so much affect I cannot say.

And yes, she is just sleeping now nothing else.

I guess the day this Tama come, is really not a day we can forget or even act like we forget it as it announce its presence everyday in some way or other, one day bigger and the other day smaller.

But still then, what a relief that my little gift is okay again.