LA: Loyalty or Annihilation

Chapter 11

Dr. Kenny Davidson's POV

Tension.

That's the first thing I notice before I even enter room three.

I've worked in medicine long enough to recognize different kinds of silence.

Fearful silence.

Grieving silence.

Angry silence.

The somebody said some s**t before I got here silence.

Room three definitely has the last one.

I glance down at the tablet in my hand one more time.

Jade Montgomery.

Thirty-six.

Syncope.

Nausea.

Dizziness.

Vitals stabilized.

Bloodwork back.

Well...

At least I have good news.

I step through the doorway.

"Looks like I arrived right on time."

Three faces turn toward me.

Mrs. Montgomery is sitting upright in bed with a basin in her hands.

Her husband is beside her.

And Kristal Jones is standing near the monitor.

Kristal.

I've known her since she started working here.

Not known known.

Professionally.

Mostly.

I've noticed her, though.

Hard not to.

Beautiful woman.

Coco-brown skin. Auburn-brown hair. Those blue eyes that have probably caused more than a few people to forget what they were saying mid-sentence.

She's also good at her job.

Competent.

Patient.

Funny when she's comfortable.

And completely unavailable.

Or at least that's what I assumed.

Because there was always an engagement ring on her finger.

So I kept my interest exactly where it belonged.

To myself.

But today...

No ring.

Interesting.

Not relevant.

But interesting.

I turn my attention to my patient.

"Mrs. Montgomery?"

"Unfortunately."

That gets a chuckle out of me.

"I'm Dr. Kenny Davidson."

Kristal updates me on the returning nausea.

I thank her, then approach the bed.

Mrs. Montgomery's husband introduces himself as Shawn.

Something about the way Kristal's expression changes when he says her husband catches my attention.

Barely.

But enough.

Ah.

There's a story here.

None of my business.

I check the results again.

"Mrs. Montgomery, your bloodwork gave us a clear explanation for the nausea, dizziness, and fainting."

She grips her husband's hand.

"What explanation?"

I smile.

"You're pregnant."

Silence.

"Congratulations, Mr. and Mrs. Montgomery."

Nobody moves.

Okay.

Not exactly the reaction I usually get.

Mr. Montgomery stares at me.

Mrs. Montgomery stares at me.

Kristal—

Jesus.

All the color drains from her face.

My attention sharpens immediately.

"Kristal?"

"I'm fine."

Automatic answer.

She is definitely not fine.

Mrs. Montgomery finally blinks.

"I'm..."

She looks down at herself.

"Pregnant?"

"Yes."

"Are you sure?"

"Your bloodwork is positive. We'll confirm gestational age and make sure everything is progressing appropriately, but yes."

Her hand moves slowly toward her stomach.

Mr. Montgomery still hasn't said anything.

He looks like I just told him he's won the lottery and been indicted in the same sentence.

"Mr. Montgomery?"

He blinks.

"I'm going to be a father?"

"Yes."

His gaze immediately shifts.

Not toward his wife.

Toward Kristal.

Interesting.

Kristal looks back at him.

Whatever passes between them makes me feel like I've accidentally walked into the middle of a television drama that's already six seasons deep.

Her expression hardens.

"Excuse me, Dr. Davidson."

I turn toward her.

"My apologies, but I'm being summoned to the nurses' station urgently."

I didn't hear anyone summon her.

Before I can respond, she gives me a quick professional bow.

Then she's gone.

I stare at the doorway.

Huh.

Definitely a story.

I look back at the Montgomerys.

Mrs. Montgomery is watching the same doorway.

So is her husband.

Yeah.

Definitely a f*****g story.

---

Kristal's POV

Pregnant.

Pregnant.

Jade is pregnant.

Shawn's wife is pregnant.

With his baby.

I need to get the f**k out of this room.

Immediately.

Because professionalism has limits, and mine is currently standing beside a hospital bed holding his pregnant wife's hand.

I stare at Shawn.

He looks at me.

And for one horrifying second, I want to punch him.

Not Jade.

Never Jade.

Him.

Right in the f*****g face.

Because apparently there was still one tiny corner of my heart he hadn't managed to stomp on yet.

Congratulations.

He found it.

Pregnant.

God.

I've wanted children since I was eleven years old.

I don't even remember what started it.

Maybe holding somebody's baby.

Maybe watching some stupid family movie.

Doesn't matter.

I just remember knowing.

Someday, I want to be a mom.

Not immediately.

Not recklessly.

I wanted the whole thing.

Love.

Marriage.

A home.

Children.

Family.

I just never found the right man.

I thought—

No.

Don't.

I refuse.

I will not stand beside Shawn's pregnant wife and mourn children that never existed.

I will not do this here.

The room suddenly feels smaller.

Hotter.

My chest tightens.

No.

Not now.

Shawn will not watch me break.

Especially not over this.

"Excuse me, Dr. Davidson."

He looks at me.

"My apologies, but I'm being summoned to the nurses' station urgently."

Lie.

Beautiful lie.

Nobody called me.

I bow quickly.

Then leave before anyone can say anything.

The second I'm in the hallway, I keep walking.

Don't run.

Running looks suspicious.

Walk.

Professional pace.

Normal face.

Breathe.

"Kris?"

Maya.

Nope.

Not now.

"Bathroom."

That's all I manage.

I turn the corner.

My eyes burn.

Absolutely f*****g not.

We've cried enough over that man.

I make it into the staff restroom and lock the door behind me.

Then grip the sink.

My reflection looks back at me.

Pale.

Shaken.

Angry.

"Hell no."

I turn on the cold water.

Splash my face.

Once.

Twice.

Again.

"This isn't your loss."

I stare into my own eyes.

"It isn't."

Jade is pregnant.

That's her life.

Her marriage.

Her child.

Not mine.

Whatever dreams I once attached to Shawn died the day I learned his wife's name.

This doesn't change that.

It just...

Makes the funeral more f*****g official.

I close my eyes.

One breath.

Then another.

Eventually, I'll have children.

If that's still what I want.

With someone who is actually free to love me.

Someone whose vows to me won't require another woman's divorce papers first.

Someone I don't have to share.

And if that person never comes?

I'll still build a life worth living.

But right now...

My heart can't take another second in that room.

---

Jade's POV

Pregnant?

I'm pregnant?

I stare at Dr. Davidson.

Then at my stomach.

Then at Shawn.

"I'm pregnant?"

"Yes."

I hear the rest.

Something about bloodwork.

Follow-up testing.

Gestational age.

Monitoring.

Hydration.

Prenatal vitamins.

But everything sounds far away.

Because I'm pregnant.

This is what I wanted.

Part of why I came home permanently was because I was tired of airports and hotel rooms and living out of suitcases.

I wanted roots.

My husband.

A home.

A family.

A baby.

And now...

I'm pregnant.

So why isn't this simple?

My eyes move across the room.

Kristal.

Oh God.

She looks like she should be in this hospital bed instead of me.

Her face has lost all its color.

Then Shawn looks at her.

Not casually.

Instinctively.

And I understand exactly why she needs to leave.

"Excuse me, Dr. Davidson. I'm being summoned to the nurses' station urgently."

Nobody summoned her.

We all know it.

She bows and disappears.

I watch the doorway after she's gone.

Something inside me aches for her.

Which is ridiculous.

Isn't it?

I'm the wife.

She's my husband's ex-fiancée.

I shouldn't feel guilty about being pregnant by my own husband.

And yet...

I do.

Not because I've done something wrong.

I haven't.

But because I've just watched another piece of Kristal's imagined future with Shawn become mine.

A future she believed was hers because he told her it was.

Did she want children?

Probably.

Did they talk about them?

The thought makes my stomach twist for reasons that have nothing to do with morning sickness.

I don't want to know.

That's a lie.

I desperately want to know.

Dr. Davidson keeps talking.

"Given the fainting episode, I'd like you to take it easy for the next few days. Stay hydrated, eat smaller meals if nausea is an issue, and we'll arrange appropriate follow-up care."

I nod.

"Okay."

"We'll also want—"

I'm barely listening.

Because Shawn is holding my hand.

But his eyes keep drifting toward the door.

Toward Kristal.

My fingers tighten around his.

His attention snaps back.

There you are.

"I'm sorry," he murmurs.

For what?

Not listening?

Looking at her?

Hurting her?

Hurting me?

Existing?

I don't ask.

I look down at our joined hands.

This baby should make everything clearer.

Shouldn't it?

We're married.

I'm pregnant.

He's living at home again.

This is what I wanted.

Except one thought won't leave me alone.

If Kristal hadn't walked away...

Would Shawn be sitting here with me?

Or would he still be trying to choose?

My stomach sinks.

No.

Worse.

I already know.

He wouldn't have chosen me yet.

He came home because Kristal ended their relationship.

Two weeks after she left.

And now I'm carrying his child.

I should feel nothing but happiness.

Instead, happiness is tangled with fear.

Because for the first time, I let myself ask the question I've been avoiding since Shawn returned home.

If Kristal hadn't left Shawn...

Would I be divorced right now?

---

Shawn's POV

My wife is pregnant.

I'm going to be a father.

Holy s**t.

A father.

I stare at Jade.

Her hand is in mine.

Her other hand slowly settles over her stomach.

There's a baby in there.

Our baby.

Something powerful moves through me.

Shock.

Fear.

Wonder.

All of it at once.

Then I make the mistake of looking at Kristal.

Fuck.

She looks devastated.

And I know why.

We talked about children.

Not constantly.

But enough.

Names.

How many.

Whether we'd stay in Los Angeles or eventually move somewhere quieter.

She used to joke that if our daughter inherited my attitude, she'd send both of us back to New Jersey.

I promised her—

Stop.

Jesus Christ.

I promised Kristal a family while I already had a wife.

What kind of man does that?

Apparently me.

Her eyes meet mine.

There's pain there.

Anger.

But something else too.

Finality.

"Excuse me, Dr. Davidson. I'm being summoned to the nurses' station urgently."

Then she's gone.

My body reacts before my brain does.

I almost stand.

Jade's hand tightens around mine.

I stop.

Right.

My wife.

My pregnant wife.

Sit your ass down.

I force myself to focus on Dr. Davidson.

He's talking about hydration.

Follow-ups.

Prenatal care.

Warning signs.

I hear maybe half of it.

Kristal's face keeps flashing through my mind.

I want to go after her.

Not because I think I can fix anything.

I can't.

I know that now.

But I want to tell her...

What?

Sorry?

Again?

That I didn't plan this?

That Jade being pregnant doesn't erase what Kristal and I talked about?

Every possible sentence sounds worse than silence.

So I stay seated.

Jade's hand remains wrapped around mine.

I look at her.

Really look.

She's pregnant.

We're having a baby.

This isn't about Kristal.

It can't be.

I squeeze Jade's hand.

"Are you okay?"

She looks at me for a long moment.

Then down at her stomach.

"I don't know yet."

Fair.

I don't either.

Dr. Davidson continues explaining what happens next.

This time, I make myself listen.

Because whatever happens between Jade and me...

There's someone else involved now.

Someone innocent.

Our child.

And for once in my life, I can't afford to f**k this up.