Me a killer? Nah , I'm a murder!

It's over, isn't it? ; It's over, isn't it? 806 words Hey there , it's me. I know that it's been a while but I just wanted to say that I'm not sorry for what I did because I did what any person would have done.Those people caused me pain so i killed them. I was a soldier, I used to be an assets to our government but all that changed after the incident. That incident took everything from me , it took my family , my friends and most of all my dignity , and after that I just lost my self , I lost myself to the anger and the hate . I would have never done it, but because of the pain and the sorrow I was led into doing it, and somehow deepdown I don't regret anything at all , for all my actions had reasons. You , your sitting there , in that chair calling me a killer, well I just wanted you to know that I am not really killer but a murderer , I don't need you to criticize me , because I know exactly what I am. It's funny because , I thought I would never disobey an order ,I never thought that I would kill a person willingly, but things really do change don't they? because here I am , I've had one hundred and twenty victims , and somehow my heart never heals. They say what goes around comes around , but I don't think that's how it goes , I think that in this life the strong win while the weak lose and I guess , that's what made me kill them, because somehow I was tired of being weak. So i eventually realized that the world was cruel , and to survive , I had to be more cruel than the world itself. I was loyal to the government , but the government did nothing to help me , they watched me suffer and they did nothing. Please don't blame me , because the government did this to me , I have changed and they are the ones who changed me. My heart is heavier, my mind filled with all these crazy things I think of doing and somehow deep down, my kindness had turned into cruelty. But I can't stop because killing makes me feel at peace , it calms me down. There's just something about guns and bombs that makes me go out of control , they make me go crazy I know that you think of me as a cold blooded murderer , but you need to remember that I was not born like this , remember that I was created by the government and the pain that was inside me , all the times I served as a loyal soldier meant nothing to them , even though I stole when they told me to I even killed when they told me to , but they left when I needed them the most , they didn't help even though they had all the resources that could have found the people who killed my wife. The government taught me to kill , and that's the only thing I have ever known because, I've been doing it all my life. I've never had a good father , my father killed my mom in front of me when I was seventeen , I watched her soul leave her body as my father strangled her , I punched my father and stuck a knife in his throat. My father was my first victim and somehow deepdown , I thought he would be the last , but wasn't the case because there was the second one and the third, the fourth , the number kept growing until I couldn't keep count anymore. To me killing was habit , a habit I could never stop, no matter how hard I tried. I have told you so much but I never told you my name , my name is Mike Mennis but I'm known as the Nightcrawler, I will continue killing until , someone kills me. Death , I'm not afraid of death because If I were to die ,I would leave my misery behind, I would also leave the cruelty of mankind behind , why ?why are our people so cruel , for if not for their cruelty , maybe just maybe I might have turned out differently. So I am turning myself in because there is nothing else for me to do , I've avenged my wife and son and i am left with nothing, I'm broken and nothing can fix me , but I'm here to pay for my sins , because when I killed all those people I knew that there would be consequences. So arrest me sir , because I really don't care anymore.