Fading Embrace: A Love Beyond Adversity

Elaine Akiyama’s pov 1, 2, 3 I was counting seconds as the clock ticked, sitting in an all-white room, looking at the beautiful scenery out the window. Life was so calm, peaceful, and full of love. I didn’t realize the paper I was holding was already wet with tears. I didn’t notice tears flowing down my cheeks. I was giggling. ‘Why would I cry if this is the end that I want?’ I realized that the day I would be laying in bed, breathing my final breath, would be my sunset. My ending was beautiful, just like the sunset. I won’t be gone; there’s a part of me in the universe portraying that I once was a human being with dreams. The sunset may be the ending, but there's a sunrise, and there's tomorrow. ELaine, that’s my name. My mom always called me Leyna, which I don’t like. I lived in the city of Taguig in the Philippines. I am half Filipino and half Japanese. I moved to Japan when I was 9 years old. My life here in Japan was great, but the Philippines is way better. I really like my life; I have loving parents and a brother. Since childhood, I always felt sick. I often left school for medication, and that's why we moved to Japan to cure my illness. Mom always told me, "Leyna, don't worry about the future because the sunrise is always beautiful." And I always replied to her, "Why not worry, Mom? It's better to think about the future so that we can be prepared." I always told her, "Mom, the sunrise is not always beautiful; what if it rains?" and my mom just laughed. I admit I was so silly in those days, so young not to understand my mom's words. One beautiful morning, I woke up early for school. I smelled the crisp toasted bread and sweet strawberry jam. I heard the birds chirping. It was such a warm morning. My mother gave me a morning kiss on the cheek and said, "Good morning, my lady. How did you sleep? Let's have breakfast." As time passed, I told my mom, "Mom, I'm going to school." "Yes, sweetie, have a nice day at school. Love you," my mom replied. I immediately got my gym class uniform. The morning at school was great, and gym class was even better. I liked sports, but sports didn’t like me; I always fainted when I overdid it. Today, I was going full blast to play badminton. A couple of minutes passed, and I enjoyed playing badminton every second, not until my world began to darken. My heart was beating faster than my breath, and I passed out. The last thing I saw was my classmate calling for help, and after that, I felt nothing but saw empty darkness. I felt a strong light coming from above. It was so bright that it was hard to see, but I did. I heard a beeping sound, like a machine, and I heard someone crying. I forcefully opened my eyes and saw the light and people looking at me crying. "Mom, Dad, what happened? Why are you guys crying?" I said in a slow voice. I was wearing oxygen, and I remembered all the things that happened. I was in the hospital, wearing all these wires on my body. It was hard to move or even talk. They just kept crying, and so did I. Days passed, and I was still in the hospital. My condition improved; at least I wasn't wearing that stupid oxygen anymore, but I was still in the hospital. Days and months passed, and I found myself wondering why I was still in this stupid hospital. I asked my mom why I was still here. She looked at me with teary eyes, as if she was about to cry, and said, "You're here, sweetie, to get better." I was so mad; I was not satisfied with her answer. "Mom, I'm already healed. In fact, I can play as much as I want now. Can we just go home and get back to our normal lives?" My mom cried, and then she said, "Yes, sweetie, we're going home." I was so happy to hear those words. Later that night, my thoughts were filled with happy memories, and I couldn't wait to go back to school. In the morning, I woke up early to pack my things, and my mom came in. "What are you doing, honey?" she asked. "Aren't we going home?" I replied. "Yes, we are, but let me do that. Just sit there." I was happily looking out the window and writing a poem when I felt a sharp pain in my chest. I instinctively placed my hands on my chest and turned back to see my mom, but she wasn't there. I cried out in pain as my vision began to blur, and then I saw my mom running towards me. Before I could utter the words "Mom, help me," I fainted. I found myself on a beach, gazing at my mom, dad, and brother, all smiling at me. "Come here, sweetie," my dad called out. They were playing with the waves, and it looked like so much fun. I ran towards them and joined in. After playing, we ate a lot of food. Life felt incredibly beautiful; I hoped that this joyful moment would never end. But suddenly, everything vanished. I heard noises and saw a man dressed in all white. He shone a light in my eyes and said, "Hey there, Laine. You finally woke up. Just relax and now, open your eyes." As I opened my eyes, I saw my mom crying, her eyes swollen with tears. I also noticed my brother on the phone, saying that she had woken up. It dawned on me that all those warm moments, the waves, the sand on the beach, were just a dream. I cried, and my mom comforted me. "It's okay, honey. We're just going to stay here for now, and once you're healed, we can go home." I stared out the window, lost in thought. I watched my mom unpacking my things. I wanted to shout, to fly into a rage, but only tears flowed down my cheeks. I asked my mom, "I won't get better, right?" She didn't answer; instead, she hugged me and kissed my forehead. "What do you want to eat for dinner, my love? Give me the list, and I'll buy it for you," she said in a positive tone. Her silence answered my question, making it clear that I wasn't going to heal. "I'm craving tonkatsu. Can you buy it for me?" I asked. My mom smiled and replied, "All for you, my love." As she left to buy dinner, I noticed my notebook. Opening it, I found a poem I had written before I passed out. “As the sun rose, casting a warm glow through the hospital window, My heart danced with anticipation. The day had finally arrived – the day she would bid farewell to the sterile walls and be embraced by the open world beyond. I dressed in clothes that felt like newfound freedom, each fabric whispering promises of adventures ahead. The scent of possibility lingered in the air as I packed my belongings, each item a reminder of the journey I had traveled within those hospital walls.” As I read my unfinished poem, tears flowed. "I thought I could have a normal life. I thought everything was okay," I said to myself. At night, I wondered why my mom hadn't come back yet, so I snuck out of my room and saw her. I was about to call out to her, but she entered a room labeled "Dr. Sakaguchi Mitsui's office." That was the name on the door my mom had gone into. I watched as she talked to a doctor, presumably Dr. Sakaguchi. When I opened the door slightly, I saw my mom break down in tears. She said, "I cannot bring myself to tell her. I can't say those words. It breaks my heart; my words are stuck in my throat." However, there is no other choice; you have to tell her about her condition. She only has 6 months to live. My mom cried so much. I was shocked, so I quietly closed the door, but it made a noise. I saw my mom looking at me in shock. I slowly walked back to my room, and my mom called out to me, but I didn't pay attention. I wast just sitting my bed and asked my mom “ what’s my illnes and how long? “ 6 months, you’ve been diagnose with a terminal heart disease and there's no cure for it; she answered; “ im sosorry my love for keeping this for you its hard for me to say it cause I don’t wanna lose you “ I smiled at her and told her, "We can't help it, Mom. I don't blame you, nor do I hate you. The sunrise is always beautiful, isn't it?" My mom just cried; she cried and cried, continuously apologizing for what had happened. "Mom, you don't have to say sorry. I'm hungry. Where is my tonkatsu?" She calmed down and handed me the tonkatsu. After we ate, my mom went home, and I lay in my bed, looking out the window, counting the stars just like I counted my remaining 6 months. The room was dark, and so were my heart and mind. I tried to accept this reality, but everything was so painful to acknowledge, so I just cried every night.