Loving Mrs. Hwang

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I have to pull myself together but heartbreak is a b***h, what more if karma added to it?

After I left the school, I went home to our empty house. It relieved me somehow because I wanted to be alone and think.

Honestly, I feel betrayed. I feel hurt and I feel unwanted.

What's wrong with me? Why is this happening to me? What did I do to deserve this s**t? I questioned myself. I was mad at myself for letting this happened. I shouldn't have done that.

I understand the situation, really. It's my fault because I can't control my emotions. I quickly decide and insist what I want which is wrong.

Everything happened was rapid and unexpected. I just wanted to get what I want, was that wrong? Everyone us wants to get what they want so they do everything and unusual things to get it right?

Situation. Yeah right, it will depend on the situation and my situation was obviously unacceptable.

I assumed.

I forced.

I became selfish.

This was the consequence of what I've done; regret, heartbreak and karma. Those feelings at the same time? What is this? 3 in 1 coffee? Great.

There's no other pain like this. It's so freaking bad that it made me loss for words. I feel so tired to even speak but my mind was negatively active and I thought, I will never be the same after this s**t because I feel like I've lost myself and I don't know how to find it again. Learn the hard way huh?

The pain hurts me mentally and physically like someone's stabbing my heart. Tears won't stop falling from my eyes and it's just so painful.

When I was ready to try relationship again, this s**t happened. Seolhyun really doesn't like me. Well... she's perfect compared to me, I'm nothing. It was just a f*****g dare and I saw her eyes filled with pity.

I don't like it when someone look at me like that. Of all emotions, why pity? It makes me feel hopeless.

And all night, these thoughts were swarming in my mind. I barely slept then the next day I woke up kinda late around 10 am. Geez, I slept around 6 in the morning. That wasn't much sleep.

I felt groggy, my head was throbbing and my body was weak. Cool, I think I have fever.

I forced myself to get a pitcher of water and a glass then I went back to my room. I didn't have the appetite to eat so I just drank water the whole day.

Obviously, I skipped school today and tomorrow is weekend. I have three days away from them, I hope to be fine soon.

Maybe, they were talking about the dare and how easy I am to fall for that trick. I couldn't care less, they can talk about it whenever they want but that doesn't define me. I know who I am and I will not act like a victim here, gosh, never.

Seolhyun is still a good friend to me. I used her and this is the consequence. I'm not mad at her, I will never be mad at her. I also won't tell her that I just used her as my revenge. I don't have a heart to hurt her.

I was pondering it the whole day and thank God I think I had enough sleep last night, 5 hours of sleep was good right?

Kill me now, there thoughts were eating me.

"But I can feel my fever worsened. Damn. Why is so damn cold? I feel so cold!" I was rolled in my duvet cover like a burrito.

My throat felt really dry, my lips were cracking, my body was so weak that I could barely move plus my headache was killing me like I wanted to cry because of the pain. s**t.

It was kinda late in the morning then my phone rang. Cool. Someone remembered me.

I took my phone on the nightstand, my sister was calling me. I answered the call rightaway.

"Hello baby sis, how are you?"

"Oh... umm... I'm fine," I replied with my hoarse voice.

"Wait. You sounds like you don't. Are you alright?" I heard her worried tone.

"Yepp, I'm just kinda feel not good but it's not that bad. I can handle myself," I lied. I didn't want her to worry.

She sighed "Did you take your med? Did you eat?"

"Umm..." I couldn't answer her. I haven't eaten anything since yesterday, just water.

"Gosh Kim Taeyeon! Why are you not taking care of yourself?? Huh? Do you want me to go home right now? Don't be like a baby! Help yourself!" Hyoyeon ranted.

"I'm really fine sis, I promise I'll eat and take my med," I crossed my fingers. Not really. I could barely move.

"Don't lie to me you little brat, I know you won't do that." She got me, she knew me well.

"It's okay anyway..."

"Umm... yes sis. Don't worry I can handle myself," I reassured her.

"I know you can but when in times like this, you can't."

I frowned.

"I said that my friend will look after you right?"

"Oh yeah... the neighbor?"

"Oh no lil'Tae, my best friend will go there and stay. I called to inform you that she's on her way there. Please, be kind to her and she will take care of you."

"What? I don't need a babysitter!" I whined.

"Sorry but she will stay there and it's final. Besides she has no place to stay yet, so she will stay with us for a month while looking for apartment."

"But-"

"It's just for a month sweetie, she's my best friend since college."

I groaned "Fine! As if I can do anything about it, this is your place anyway!" I said in defeated.

Hyoyeon squealed "Thank you lil'sis! Don't worry she's kind! You will like her and she will take care of you. So, just wait for her. Take care Taeng, I will just call her."

"Okay okay... take care too."

"I love you."

"Love you too sis," then she hang up first. I rolled my eyes.

I saw messages from Yoona asking me where the heck am I and why I skipped school yesterday. Messages from Seolhyun apologizing and asking me to talk to her. Missed calls from her too.

I don't know but I feel hurt when I remember what happened.

I threw my phone on the bed then forced myself to get up. I needed to drink water but my pitcher was already empty.

I dragged my feet from the bed and got up. I took the pitcher and the glass then walked out of my room.

I swear I'm not a couch potato, well, sort of... um. A little bit? I guess. My shoulders were slouched on my way to the kitchen, it was because I felt weak and exhausted. My head was spinning too so don't judge me.

I drank two glasses of water, it made me feel a little better then I refilled the pitcher.

But I needed to go back to my bed, my headache was throbbing painfully. I took the glass and pitcher with me when I was in the living room, the doorbell rang.

Alright. The best friend was here! I cheered myself. Duh.

I put the glass and pitcher on the table then I went to the main door. I didn't bother to peek on the peephole and just opened the door.

I froze when I saw the best friend.

I blinked my eyes few times because I couldn't believe who it was.

The destiny is surely playing bad game with me.

Wtf?

The best friend looked shocked as well.

"You?" I asked in disbelief.

"What the... you're... you're Hyoyeon's little sister?"

It was none other than Professor T.

I hope I was dreaming but no, not a chance because I could feel my head hurts.

Oh fudge.

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