Chapter 15
1286 Words
Chapter 15
Bella Alleja Cion
Present times....
Everything has changed ever since all of those things happened. Marami ang nagbago sa akin at sa buhay ko. Natuto akong maging matapang para hindi apihin. Natuto akong maging maarte, in a way that I can say no right now.
I became my own alter ego of Bella. A fearless one, a don'tless, a pristine queen that everyone should see as a highest authority.
I am also became a picky in so many things. I don't have to easily give my trust to anyone. They are required to meet even the single rules and standards that I set.
I always doubt myself before. Napakahina kong trans, lagi na lang akong nalalamangan, ginagamit at tinatapakan.
I asked myself. Why am I letting them to belittle me? Then I realize that I should abuse what I have, just to attain what I need.
Money.
Money can drawn anyone's attention. Control them like a puppet using a string of valuable money. Kapangyarihan ang pera, ang pera ay isang arnas. And just for the moment that I learnt, I use it.
Pera-pera na lang 'ika nila. Dahil iyon naman talaga ang totoo. From inferior became somewhat superior with them. Looks who is kneeling now? Hindi ako! Kung hindi sila!
Nakilala ko rin si Mela at Tara na parehong mayaman, bitchesa pero totoo. Since then I have change because I needed too. They somewhat forge me into a stronger version of a Bella Alleja Cion.
I just remained foolish in a one exact thing. I am still into Cromford, I kept and still chasing him like a dog wagging his tail for a piece of bone. Sounds hopeless right now. Pero gusto ko talaga siya, at isa pang dahilan ay ang habilin ni Mitch sa akin.
Pero mailap na parang hayop si Blake. He is untouchable since then. He gets the greatest grudge and hatred a person can throw on my face.
Nakalagay na sa isip niya yung mga nangyari sa nakaraan. He even accused me of killing my best friend just to get him. Nakakagalit, but maybe he just accused me because I am still into him.
Ngayon nga ay narito kami sa isa sa mga favorite naming bar ni Tara at Mela. We are dancing both in a rhythm of a loud music.
I just want to refresh and recharge. If I am just my old self, she will be annoyed with the bombarding sounds from this place. The old Bella will always be a kill joy, silent lover and the pathetic little girl gay.
And do you know the reason why I am here. Of course you don't know b***h. Narito ako kasi sa nangyari na pagka-lock namin ni Cromford.
I am little by little being discouraged with him. Kaunti na nga lang ay igi-give up ko na ata iyon e. Masakit na rin yung ipinapamukha niya sa akin na wala akong pagasa. Sometimes, I am having a thought of breaking my promise to Mitch.
She want me to take care with that big guy with small brain. Halata naman na ginagamit ng p****k na Anita na iyon si Cromford. But Cromford is still being so dense and blind with the truth.
Kung tutuosin ay baka hindi naman talaga gusto ni Cromford ang babae na iyon. He is just doing that to repel me away from him. Smart ass move.
For all this years, I thought I am immune with his words and actions. He treat me like an air, treat me like a trash. I am willing to give him the world, but he is good at starting to make mw feel like the old and weak Bella.
Sa tuwing nada-down na ako ng dahil kay Cromford. I am running into this on and off light of a place. Pakiramdam ko ay naliligaw ko yung kalungkutan ko kapag nasa saliw ng malakas na kanta.
I am meeting some stranger, kissing and flirting. I also tried to push myself out of my goal. Lumandi rin naman ako sa iba. Imagine the line of my exes that I just throw like a piece of clothes.
Because they cannot satisfied me! They don't have the fire of being challenge. I am not feeling ecstatic with them. Nabo-boring ako sa kanila. Their sweetness felt cringy for me. Kaya naman ay ganoon na lang sila na inaalis ko sa aking sistema.
Only Cromford remain unchangeable. He is still my dream, my unreachable dream. He is always my standard when it comes to a men.
Bumalik muna ako sa aming lamesa. Same as with the two girls na parehong single din. I don't know why they always patronize me. Boys are what again? Oh right, just a piece of machine that use for awhile then if rusted, nagloko ay itatapon na lang. I took the glass of tequila and drink it fastly.
Agad na gumuhit sa lalamunan ko ang pait at init ng liquor na ito. Humahagod maski sa tiyan ko. I put some salt and lemon on my tongue and taste buds just to ease that burning sensation, and that bitter aftertaste. Hindi ako masanay-sanay sa alak na ito.
"Hinay-hinay ka naman Bella. We don't want a crazy daughter of a b***h to be handful, at mag-initiate na iuwi ka," sabi ni Mela while drinking his light drinks.
I rolled my eyes. "Hindi na ako weak ano? I can handle my alcohol tolerance." That is actually a huge fact.
Two years ago ay lagi na lang akong nagtatawag ng uwak kahit nakakatatlong shot pa lang ako. Pero time to time ay nag-improve na ako at mas lumaki ang bahay alak ko. I am not a drunktard for a record. Medyo natuwa lang ako na kaya ko ng gawin yung mga kinatatakutan ko noon.
I don't fear doing things that I am scared to do before. Mas naging bold na ako sa mga desisyon ko. I am not fragile trans na takot na takot na mabasag, no! Hindi na ako babasaging pinggan ngayon.
I consider myself pristine also. Pero hindi na katulad noon. I don't easily shed a tears. I don't easily give-up without giving a time to battle.
"Sure you do," side comment of Tara while looking for some guy that she could victimized. Same old passionate crime.
I started to walk into the crowd again to dance and be wild for a moment. Gusto ko lang sumayaw, magpakalasing, magpakabaliw. I don't want to think again, and face my problem. It is so stereotypical!
I was dancing with some random guy ng may humigit sa kamay ko. I was so shock dahil sa Hendry ito. My past, I mean my recent ex. I dumped him because he is so possessive. Ayaw ko pa naman ng natatali.
"Bitawan mo nga ako!" I shouted even we are practically in the middle of the dance floor. The music stopped and now, we gain the attention of the crowd.
He looks so messed up. Namumula ang mukha niya, he is still handsome with his curly brown hair like an Italian hotty. He still disappointed me, he ain't enough to satisfying me. So what is he doing here!
"You can't break up with me Bella. You made me fall for your knee! You are f*****g mine!" Napapikit ako sa sakit dahil sa mahigpit na pagkakahawak niya sa aking kamay.
"Nababaliw ka na! Bitaw!" Thank goodness at agad na nakalapit si Mela at Tara sa akin. The bouncer responded at pinalabas na lang ang baliw na iyon. Thank goodness!
"Lapitin ka talaga ng mga ex mong nasi siraan!" sabi ni Tara.
I sigh, god I am almost fainted with the shock.
- Writer
