INTREPID

EPIPHANY

I opened my eyes,my body was in pain, and I didn't even know where I was. The nurse came rushing to my bed,I couldn't believe I had ended up in the hospital. What happened to me? you were brought in, by your friends from your school.You fainted in the middle of the road,you were almost hit by a car.yeah, well,who stopped it?what did you say?nothing.Why would you want to die? I was quiet. Talk to me, whatever it is, I am sure it has a solution.I can see it in your eyes that you are hurting,no one can miss that but holding everything in, will not help you.I am a stranger to you,so no judgement here,plus confidentiality is part of my job.If anything you tell me gets out,you can sue me and I can easily loose my licence.I was still quiet,I don't even know how to put it in words.

I do, want to talk to someone,to be honest I feel like I am slowly loosing my mind.I have been lied to,and left pregnant by someone I thought loved me.I have no one in my life,I don't even know anything about raising a child and the father of the child ghosted me without an explanation.I don't know why I am telling you this but I can't bring this innocent child to life and the thought of abortion is breaking my heart.The nurse was just listening to me,Do you want to abort the baby?yes I do,I feel like, that's the best option.The father of your child has to give consent to the abortion and from what I am hearing he doesn't know that you are pregnant?no he doesn't.No matter how wrong he is,he deserves to know about this child.

People will judge my character for being a single mother,I said to her,yes they will, and they always will.Never live for the opinions of others over your life,people will always talk no matter what you do.you are down right now but you are not hopeless my dear,beauty can come out of ashes you won't believe it until you try.What do you say? she was looking at me smiling,I feel better after hearing everything you have said.I am a pretty strong person and I have finances to support myself so I will not abort my baby and loose a chance of being loved unconditionally.

Is this how my mother felt? at least my father refused her mine could not even look at me after we made love.I feel like I disgusted him too much to even stand my presence.Not knowing what the hell is going on in his mind freaks me out.But I have to fight for this baby,its mummy time.The nurse, left to get me something to eat.While laying in that hospital bed, I had an epiphany,I am sorry baby I broke down on you but I am so happy that you are here.Mummy will fight for you and will give you all her love.You have become everything to me,I will make sure you are healthy baby okey? The nurse laughed when she walked in with a tray of food.I felt better after eating and went back to school.

I have decided to keep the baby,but I can't shake the feeling that I have in my chest and the anxiety in my stomach.This issue has made me feel really small, but I have to get through this no matter the challenges I have to face.But before that,I have to make some serious decisions and I may have to be a bit selfish this time.I may have to say goodbye to a lot of people in my life so that my focus can only be about me and my baby.Mike is an evil baxxxxd but I am thankful for this baby no matter how he or she came to this world,I will give him or her mu whole heart.

Graduation is in feel days, but I don't think I can attend it, I don't know how to hide this much pain from everyone and pretend nothing is going on,moreover,I have no one coming to support me.when my name is called,no one will clap for me and cry tears of joy, I would probably be the one crying tears of loneliness.I feel like I will not manage trying to smile through my pain.Grace has texted me that,she is going out with someone so she will not be here tonight,which is perfect for my plan.

I quickly gathered my strength and started packing my staff.I don't have much, so it only took like an hour to fully organise myself.Then I wrote two letters,one addressed to Grace and the other one for Mike, even if he doest deserve it.But I need to at least say good bye to my best friend who I know will be mad at me but I hope we get a chance to talk some day.I was crying while writing the letters and I feel drained.

My dearest Grace,words fail me to express how much I love you and appreciate you for always being by my side,even if you were too cool for me.But something has come up,I have to go home early and I hope someday I get a chance to explain to you properly.I know you will be flying out of the country for your masters Degree,have a safe flight my friend and have fun.I will always love you. Don't ask too many questions,I will give you answers when we meet someday. Goodbye, sweetheart,

yours only,

Zoe.

I finished Mike's letter,and I called a tax.I usually do not like travelling in the night, but desperate times call for desperate measures.The tax reached within thirsty minutes and I packed my bags and left campus. I looked behind me,as the picture of my school faded slowly until it was out of my sight.School has been my home for the past four years, and now it has become the place I used to know.why is it that,the most important people in my life tend to leave?,everyone I love is taken away from me my mother,my father,my grandmother, and now Mike just decided to leave me,I will never forgive him.The family I have known for four years,is left behind and I am stepping into a new chapter of my life and I am scared to death.But my mother fought with everyone for me,I have to do the same for my child.Good bye everyone,until next time.