The Wolfless Goddess

The vase shattered against my head The sound filled the study Still I stood there, unshaken My gaze was fixed to the floor I did not scream I did not fall I could feel his gaze on me He had expected me to cry To flinch To beg him to spare my life But I only lowered my gaze Blood streaming down my face "May I take that as a no, Alpha Voren" I asked My voice calm Too calm Making him feel mocked My little form of rebel His expression darkened "Why are you still standing there?" "Because you have not told me to leave, Alpha Voren" The answer made the room go still I was calling death He stepped toward me I didn't move I closed my eyes for only a second Not out of fear, But out of habit His hand struck me across the face My head turned with the blow, making the bleeding worse. "You of all people should know not to talk back at me", he said wiping my blood of his hands. Yeah your right, but the will to die right now is stronger than the fear I have for you. Voren grabbed the edge of the desk and swept everything from it. Books struck the floor, A silver cup rolled towards my feet, I merely stepped around it. "The gathering is not for creatures like you, weak, wolfless, you are unworthy, your a disgrace, so don't ask me for things like this again if you don't want to end up dead", he said I nodded " Yes Alpha" I turned to leave "Cleanup this mess" Voren walked toward, then stopping beside me "And don't leave a single shard on the floor", his gaze lingered on me for a moment. "If you have enough strength to ask stupid things, then you have enough strength to clean". Without another word he left, The heavy door closed behind him The click of the lock echoed through the room. I remained still for several seconds I drew a slow breath before reaching for the first piece of glass. Every moment demanded effort My head throbbed with a dull relentless ache, The room slowly returned to perfect order, Only me remain unchanged My clothes was wrinkled from kneeling on the hard floor. Every step reminded me of the strain my body had endured I looked around the study one final time Nothing was out of place It was as though the outburst never happened. "If only people were as easy to put back together as rooms" I closed the door behind me with quiet care and started walking down the hall way. Alpha voren is the leader of valecor pack, my pack For sixteen years I've lived as the packs disgrace, not being able to awaken my wolf, I've been branded cursed, weak and unworthy. To the members of valecor pack I'm nothing but a slave, even fellow servants and slaves spit on me.To Alpha voren and his daughter I'm something far worse -- their favourite victim. I'd be lying if I said it didn't hurt, every bruise, every degrading errand, every public humiliation... It hurt. Tears roll down my cheeks The servants passing lowered their eyes, pretending not to notice me A few guards glanced in my direction before looking away just as quickly. No one asked if I was alright No one ever did I made my way toward the wash room tucked behind the servant's quarters. It was usually quiet at this hour, giving me enough privacy to wash away the already dried blood from my body and tend to wounds. There is no pack healer that'll be willing to tend to my wounds. The room was warm with rising steam I dipped clean cloth into the water and gently pressed it against my head, wincing despite my effort to remain composed. The cool water eased the sting Trying to round up, voices drifted in from the adjoining changing room. "Did you hear?, the Alpha lost his temper again" I froze Another voice answered with a laugh " When doesn't he?" " It was because of Fiona" "Again" "Who else? Apparently she asked him if he could let her attend the gathering of the moon event this year" A chorus of amused scoffs followed " She actually asked" "I heard she asks every time" "Does she really think the Alpha would let a wolfless slave follow him , who knows what she might do" Someone clocked their tongue " Sixteen! That's what surprises me, my little brother shifted at ten" "My cousin was barely twelve" " I've never heard of anyone reaching sixteen without wolfing out" " Neither have I" " The elders say it's the first time in our packs history " A brief silence followed Then someone said quietly "Even the household servants has more standing than she does" " Atleast they know where they belong" "She's an embarrassment" "No...she's worse" " She's a reminder that our pack produced something the moon goddess never chose" Soft laughter rippled through the room "You guys needed to see state she was in when she came out of his study" " She was foolish enough to ask in the first place" " She should know better by now" " I never want to be in her shoes" " Exactly" " Every time she ask, he gets angry and looses it, yet she never learns" I lowered my gaze to the basin The cloth in my hand had gotten cold None of their words had surprised me I had heard them before Different voices Different days The same opinions "...maybe the Alpha should just end her to avoid all this embarrassment " The girls laughed again I quietly wrung out the cloth an folded it I straightened my shoulders Then without a word, I opened the door separating the wash room from the changing area. The laughter stopped instantly. Several pairs of eyes turned towards No one spoke No one smiled now I met their stares for only a heartbeat There was no anger in my expression No tears. No shame. Only something they couldn't understand.