Fragments of Us

Found

One day in a future,not here.

There is a pain I’ve carried, the pain that stays and lingers on my roof when darkness creeps in ,moments of loneliness that cut so deep. There were times when I wished for a love that felt secure, a love that was unconditional.If i had to question love then was it it there in the first place?

I’ve cried silent tears over things I didn’t have, over unrequited love,wounds that took time to heal,over things i could not control.

But for you, my baby, I wanted something different, something better.

You’re the child I’ve carried in the corners of my heart,

You're the child i never was,

And the ache of not yet knowing you tears me apart.

Where is my baby?

I pray that someday you get to read it,somewhere there.

Somewhere my protection saves you from the snares of the world.

Somewhere i bind you with my love.

Somewhere safe,somewhere is me.

You are safe with me.

I wrote this before i met you,before i knew of your existence.The thought of you only exist in the wildest parts of delusions.

Are you going to have eyes like mine?

And when you get to see me,you will know.

I pray i chose the best dad for you and that he loves you harder or doubles it whenever you feel like you are not deserving.In the abscence of anything,he gets to fill that void for you.

I pray he is everything my dad was never to me.

I chose your father with careful hands,

It will not start with me or anyone that i will choose for you.

I want to be your work of art,

Art is deep,you draw your heart closer to the art that you feel the most.

I want you to feel me,in that way i will be in everything that you see,the years you get to have me will be the best and so as the years without me.There is more to life and so much to live and i wan't to be part of it.

I want to recereate every piece so that you get the best pieces,no breadcrumbs.

Hey bunny,

This is love,

I deny you the chance to meet me in real life,in my flesh form so we meet now.

As long as i am here i will give you your flowers and I love you,not only when it's convinient for me,always, you don't have to question if i don't.And if you do,look for me in the spaces you love,right?

So no, my love, I won’t be reminded of the past

I’ll be grateful that you’ll know a love that will last.A love that stays.It will melt my heart everytime for every wound I’ve carried alone,you will never know of.

Watching you loved will heal my own.I know that I won’t flinch or feel the weight of what was.

Though I’ve walked through valleys where love didn’t stay,

But I swear to you, you will never feel that weak. I will build a life that’s better than the one I’ve known so you’ll never have to question love in your home because home is just the feeling of a person.You’ll never feel unseen, unloved, out of sight.

In every hope I keep, i stay.

So when you arrive, know this is true:

I’ve been waiting with hope just for you.

And though today we’re still worlds apart,

You’ve already found a home in my heart.

with all my love,