After All This Time

What are you doing

Dear me,

It’s been a week since the waterfall incident. Chloe hasn’t talked to me since but she has given me looks of guilt. I feel bad for getting so angry with her. I guess I shouldn’t have gotten so angry with her. I just don’t understand why she has to push me to do things. Why can’t I be on my own or at least she can ask me if I want to go and if I don’t want to she should respect it. Instead she dragged me to that waterfall when I already said I wanted to leave.

Summer vacation has started, for a week now. In a week we’re going to London for 2 weeks. I’m so excited to go there. I’ve never travelled that far, well I’ve never even left the state and it’s London, imagine all the Harry Potter related places I can visit. (I’m a nerd I know)

It’s late at night, everyone is asleep. Except for Chloe I think, I think she’s doing something in her room. I’m in the living room watching Harry Potter, obviously. I’m watching Order of The Phoenix.

I hear someone going down the stairs and soon I see Chloe entering the room. She doesn’t say anything to me and just sits down on the couch. After about 10 minutes of silence, Chloe speaks. “How can you watch a movie without a snack?” Before I get a chance to respong, she gets up and goes out of the living room. Okay then.

She comes back with a bag of chips in her hand. We keep watching the movie but now with chips. It’s quiet for a while until Chloe starts talking again. “Why do you like these movies so much?” She asks me.

“Well do you have a place where you can escape from life and everything around you just disappears?” I ask her as I’m focused on the movie.

“Yeah the waterfall place.” She says and she moves her leg on the couch and I see her looking at me but I’m still facing the tv. For some reason I’m scared of looking people directly in the eyes.

“That’s Harry Potter for me, it’s my escape from life. When I’m watching or reading Harry Potter I feel free like everything terrible that has happened to me never happened. It makes me feel happy. You see that girl?” I say pointing to the tv to the girl with blonde hair and blue eyes. Chloe just nods as she listens to me with all her attention. “That’s Luna Lovegood, she’s my favorite character. She is weird but she’s not afraid to be herself. She’s just Luna, she’s perfect, she doesn’t need anyone to define her or anything. She is just herself you know?” I say and I finally turn to her and meet her eyes. She smiles.

“I’m sorry.” I say looking down and feeling embarrassed. Chloe lifts my chin up with her finger and moves closer to me. Before I know it her lips are pressed against mine. I move away from her quickly. “What are you doing?” I ask her stunned.

“I’m sorry.” Is all she says.

“We’re foster sisters, you can’t just kiss me.” I say and move away from her a little further.

“It’s not like we’re blood related.” She says and moves closer to me again. I keep moving away until I’m at the end of the couch. She gets closer to me until she’s hovering over me.

“I’m going to get kicked out of the house.” I tell her but she comes closer to my lips. I don’t do anything about it at this point. I look at her lips and her eyes repeatedly as she keeps getting closer and closer.

“I know you want this too.” She whispers into my mouth. She leans in a little more until our lips touch again. She kisses me passionately and I kiss back until I get back to my senses and push her off of me.

“No, this is bad.” I say.

“Am I that bad of a kisser?” She asks me a little hurt.

“No that’s nit what I meant.” I say panicking and I get off the couch. “I’m going to get kicked out of the house, I like it here, this family cares about me. Unless you want me out and that’s why you’re doing this.” I say trying to figure out what’s going on here.

“No, I don’t want you out of this house, I like you, I really like you.” Chloe says grabbing my hand. “No one has to know Emma.” She says and kisses me again and I kiss back. She’s a good kisser. Omg Emma stop it.

“I don’t know.” I say and sit back down on the couch. “I like it here Chloe, I don’t want to mess it up.” Chloe doesn’t say anything anymore. She makes me lay down on her legs with my head and she strokes my hair.

“It’s going to be okay.” She says and keeps stroking my hair and I slowly fall asleep.