After All This Time

The past

Dear me,

Chloe and I said I love you to each other last night after she gave me a present. She gave me something I've always wanted. It's a neckless that has 'Always' written on it and a doe next to it. It's gorgeous. I'm never going to take it off. I can't believe she bought that for me. It must have been really expensive, it looks expensive. Chloe is still sleeping. She's super cute when she's sleeping. I wish I was on this trip with only her so we could be together all the time. She makes me so happy and I never thought I would find someon that could make me this happy. Sincerely me.

I look at Chloe sleeping and I kiss her on the top of her head and I lay down next to her. She opens her eyes and smiles when she sees me. "Good morning." I say to Chloe sleeping. "Good morning." She says still pretty tired. "Last night was perfect." She says and I nod. "Yeah, even though I got soaking wet again." I say and laugh. "Sorry I didn't plan the rain." Chloe says laughing. I kiss her lips softly.

"Do you know what we're doing today?" I ask Chloe and she sits up. I lay my head on her shoulder. "No I don't know, I wish I could be here with you all day though." She says kissing my head and putting her arm around my waist. "Me too." I say and I look up at her.

"We better get ready for breakfast." I say getting up. Chloe agrees with me and she gets up too. I go into the bathroom to get dressed. I take my shirt off to expose my stomach. I look into the mirror to see the scars on my stomach that my dad left there when I still lived with him and he wasn't in jail yet. My dad used to beat me and well now I have scars all over my body. I always make sure to cover my whole body cause I don't want anyone to see these, especially not Chloe. When her hand was under my shirt I was scared she was going to feel something, like a scar. I don't want her to find out. It was the most horrible time of my life and even though that part of my life is over now, emotionally I'm not over it. I hope Chloe never finds out about this, I guess she eventually will but I hope not.

I run my hand over the biggest scar on my stomach. My dad got drunk when I got this and he was mad at me for no reason really and he whipped his belt on my bare stomach. The scar goes from my hip to my belly button. It's the worst on I have. It's faded but it'll never be gone completely. I start to cry as all the memories on how my dad hurt me came to my mind. How could someone that is supposed to love me hurt me so damn much.

"Emma? Are you almost done. Mom came to tell us that we need to go downstairs for breakfast." Chloe says. I realise I have been standing here for a while crying. I quickly put on clothes and my hogwarts hoodie and wipe my tears away so Chloe couldn't notice that I have been crying. I really don't want her to know about how much pain I've gone through in my past. It's the past and she shouldn't know about it.

"Yeah I'm ready." I say and I open the door of the bathroom. "You okay? You look like you've cried." She says. s**t she got me. "Yeah I'm fine." I say and smile lightly but look at her when I say it. "You're lying, come on sit down." She says and she sits down on the bed and waits for me to sit down too. I sit down next to her.

"What's wrong." She asks me grabbing my hand. "Nothing, I'm fine I promise." I say trying to convince her that there's nothing wrong. "I won't force you to tell me anything but know that I'm always here for you okay? You can tell me anything, I will always love you." Chloe says. She's so sweet and patient with me. I guess I'd have to tell her someday, I just don't know how she'll react.

"Can we just go and get breakfast?" I ask Chloe not wanting to talk about what I was crying about. "Sure babe." She says. "I love it when you call me that by the way." I say smiling. "I'm glad I could bring that smile back to your beautiful face." Chloe says and kisses my cheek. "Okay let's go before your parents start to get suspicious." I say and we leave the hotel room to go downstairs and have breakfast with the rest of the family.

We're eating breakfast. It's a big breakfast here. I'm never really much of a person who eats a lot of breakfast but here in this hotel everything is so delicious I could eat 5 whole meals here. Chloe is sitting opposite of me and she looks a little worried at me. She wants to know what I was crying about and I know she's going to ask me again later about it I just don't want her to know everything I have been through. I want to leave the past in the past.

What if she already knows that my dad has been violent towards me. She is really noisy sometimes and she has read some things in my diary. I've never really got into the topic of my dad hurting me a lot but I have mentioned that he's in jail because he was violent towards me. Gosh I hope she didn't read that. I don't want her to know that I'm broken.