Chapter 1
ESTHER
"F*ck! You stink. What's this smell? Wait! Is this coming from your p*ssy?"
The words didn't just hang in the air between us; they landed like a physical blow, heavy and suffocating against my skin.
I froze, my breath catching in my throat as my eyes snapped up to meet Frederick’s. For months, I had lived in this house like a ghost, existing on the periphery of his life, starved of his attention, counting the weeks since he had last looked at me with anything resembling warmth. When he finally sent that text tonight, “Be in bed by ten,” a wild, desperate spark of hope had ignited in my chest. I had rushed upstairs, slipping into the black silk robe I knew he hated just to catch his eye, craving his touch with an agonizing hunger that had been eating at me day and night for months.
I had been so ready for him. My skin was flushed, my pulse hammering a frantic rhythm against my ribs, every nerve ending screaming for the weight of him against mine. Instead, he pulled back, a scowl twisting his handsome, cruel face as he wiped his hand across his mouth like he had touched something foul.
"Frederick, how can you say that?" I scrambled up onto my knees, my voice trembling as I tried to bridge the inch of space left between us on the mattress. "What do you mean I stink? I’ve been home all day waiting for you. I showered hours ago, I wore the perfume you like, and I put on the same oil you told me to use…"
"Save it, Esther," he snapped, his voice cold enough to freeze boiling water. He didn't even look down at me as he shrugged off the sheets, his body a wall of hard, indifferent muscle as he swung his legs over the side of the bed. "You smell stale. Like a woman who sits around doing nothing all day letting herself rot. It's repulsive." "Sitting around?" My voice cracked, a spark of indignation flaring through the hurt. "I cleaned the entire house today, I prepared the dinner you wanted, and I’ve spent the last three months trying to figure out what I'm doing wrong just to get you to look at me! Why are you doing this? Why are you calling me stinking when I've been waiting, begging for you to touch me? You always find every single opportunity to humiliate me, and it's getting worse every day. Why?"
Frederick let out a sharp, cynical laugh that cut straight through my defenses. He stood up completely, towering over the bed, his dark eyes sweeping over me with a look of absolute, unadulterated contempt.
"You want me to touch you?" He stepped closer, leaning down just enough to deliver the words like a physical blade to my chest. "Look at yourself, Esther. You're desperate." The word dropped into the silence like a lead weight.
Desperate?
“You’re saying I'm desperate? I'm your wife, for goodness sake. How do I look desperate because I made myself available to my husband?” It wasn't just an insult; it was a total stripping away of my dignity. The humiliation hit me so hard my chest tore open, the oxygen rushing out of my lungs in a sharp gasp.
I sank back onto the rumpled duvet, half-dressed, the silk robe gaping open to expose the skin that had been aching for his warmth just seconds ago. My body still thrummed with a hollow, agonizing ache. I had been so intensely ready for him, every muscle coiled and desperate for release after months of cold neglect, only to be shoved aside and labeled pathetic. A dry, choked sob tore past my lips. My legs thrashed instinctively against the sheets in a flash of frustrated, agonizing heat, my body still screaming for the climax it had been promised and denied, a frantic, twitching movement of pure humiliation and unspent desire.
Tears burned the backs of my eyes, hot and blinding, spilling over my cheeks as I curled inward, hugging my arms tightly around my naked ribs to keep myself from shattering entirely. Right through the fog of my panic and pain, a voice echoed in my head with brutal clarity, my youngest sister’s voice from the night before our wedding, ringing out like a curse I was too blind to avoid. “You’re making a massive mistake, Esther,” Maya had pleaded, her hands gripping my shoulders as she stared at me with fierce, desperate eyes. “Look at him. Look at the way he talks to you even now, before you’re legally tied to him. He doesn’t look like someone who will give you the life you want. He’s cold, he’s arrogant, and he’s going to break you into pieces. He is not good for you.”
I had ignored her. I had told myself it was just pre-wedding stress, that his coldness was just ambition, that once I was truly his wife, I could earn his affection. Now, shivering in the cold air of the bedroom, the truth tasted like ash in my mouth. Maya had been right about every single word. Before I could even drag in a ragged breath to steady my shaking frame, Frederick turned his back on me. He didn't offer a towel, didn't offer an apology, and didn't even look back at the wreckage he had made of me. “When you're done crying, you can get up to do something meaningful for yourself instead of asking unnecessary questions, fool,” he scoffed.
He pulled his phone from the nightstand, tapping the screen with cold efficiency. He walked right out of the bedroom, leaving the door cracked wide open. I lay there, utterly paralyzed by the depth of my own degradation, listening to the heavy thud of his bare feet against the hardwood hallway. And then, his voice drifted back into the silent room, low, smooth, and dripping with an easy, warm affection I hadn't heard him use on me in months.
"Hey... yeah, I'm awake," he murmured into the phone, his tone wrapping around someone else like a warm blanket. "Let's meet in our usual spot." My breath locked in my chest. My tears stopped mid-flow, replaced by a cold, sickening horror.
"Esther!" His voice boomed suddenly from the sitting room, sharp and demanding, cutting through the quiet apartment like a razor blade. I froze, my heart hammering violently against my eardrums as I stared at the open bedroom door, terror and confusion warring in my veins. Oh my goodness! What again? Why is he calling my name out there right now?