Twisted

            Should i be saying this?, i thought to myself, i don't think so, muttered my inner voice. But his eyes was already clipped on me, giving me that secure sense that he was fully entailed with what he was hearing i could pretty say he was an intensive listener. But still finding it so bizarre disclosing something not divulged to anyone. Splitting up was literally harder than expected or visualized, but him not saying a word yet just seated there staring at my lips dictating each word being uttered out. Keeps giving me that embolden feeling that, someone was actually giving me the attention and listening ears, i always craved for.  *But i guess i just can't or maybe not now.* i whispered to myself. It's was blazing and dazzling, amassed with lots of sunbeams and superb tranquil. Scorching winds spiralling across the flowers and trees, with an coordinated affable serenity here in the west cost {Lagos, Nigeria}. The seventh day of the fifth month as it stroke fifteen 0'clock, there i sat before moddy with his clouting eyes smacking me to "go ahead am listening". He's such a solicitous listener, concentrated without interrupting. I was actually observing things i'd never really paid attention to, like how beautiful the view was from up here and how moddy listens arduously without remorse.  We were seated on the top flour of the building, the streets was silent as the graveyard, which had been deserted for decades, while the torrid heat of the noon stroked the leaf roofed constructed hut above us which shielded the direct sun's rays, but it was still hot. "Moddy ain't you feeling hot?" He stared smirkingly, "please... just say it, 'why do you always flinch'!" he muttered. I sniggered silently, thinking i had flinched the conversation deceptively without him acknowledging. You are sweaty soaked, he smeared, "not knowing i was already in an emotional trauma that almost melted me," was still lost in me while moddy called tenderly. ANN?...             ANN VICTOR, that's me... young, tender female in my early-twenties. Fair-light skin, long haired lady with an average female height, an outstandingly honeyed sweet voice, tremendously vital person (maybe to myself at-least), interested in everybody and everything with a neutral sense of humour. My little eyebrow matched my small eyes which was dark brown, little pointed nose, wasn't that small. While my lip, sparkling light pink. Dressed in dark brown panjamas and some casual indoor slippers.  "A cute simple lovely girl, with sexy thighs and greet syrupy personality " they say... Ain't all that honeyed anyways. Inside i always feel this unlifted burden placed upon my heart. At first growing up wasn't easy, compelled by life as a burden to others because i was limited to certain features in life. Like how the face of my mom keeps fading away gradually... Each day, that s**t hurts a lot, not to talk of the dad i never even got to know. Life has been unfair, sometimes i wonder how am being able to stand out, i guess maybe i just have a strong and striving personality, why do life keep hitting me with a brick on the head? Some ill-bred were just meant to happen, without anyone being the reason or sore cause, i'd console. Sometimes i just ask myself is all this coarse destined to me by god? Or it's just my misfortune to bare. "I'd say god is partial" if i didn't know better... There's just so much going on inside me that i barely unveil or talk about, what's the use talking about it anyways? As if anything is gonna change after talking or rather gets worsen, "because the more they know, the easier it becomes deranging you"  Always redirect the world to the version of me they all want to see, and not the ravished version which was non visualized to them yet. I looked up, caught Moddy's eyes staring rigorously at me. "Are you okay? what's up with you today" he soothed. Nothing...am fine, just a little bit tired, i maintained faintly.  Fending to eliminate the ill grimy thought clipped on my mind. I don't think so, you've been putting on some strange dejected attitude today, i thought you were about saying something con-  Oh! that's nothing, i intercepted. Have not been myself lately but am just glad you came by today.   You know you can talk to me about anything, right? Am always here for you ANN. As he speaks his sweet tender voice stroked me gently, soothing me emotionally without his awareness. Moddy Godswill, young black male, in his mid-twenties. Muscular, bold and tall (maybe 6-feet or so), low cut gold-dyed hair which made his look, Gangster. That cute pierced dimple whenever he smiles.  Light gray eyes, flat nose and well carved mouth which made him more handsome. He was on red short and black designer's top which was labelled Gussi, with some nice caved black and red leather slippers.  Do you care for a glass of water? "No thank you, am okay" Moddy assured without hesitation.  I was damn tasty, as i walked to get a glass of water, i could sense him staring at me passionately but wasn't sure why or i just thought it's nothing. It's was weekend, Sunday to be certain and everybody was home even the devil himself was present, been having a phobia for weekends lately. Can't really predict his next nefarious act he'd pull off. From the kitchen i could hear aunt calling Ariana softly, While Ariana was immensely lost in thought, in her paradigm polished bedroom, Ari Mrs Jones yield tenderly.             MATA JONES, (aka Mrs Jones) My AUNT, is coming through. She is a woman of about forty-six... tolerant, easy-going, she has the same smile as my mom, a tremendously vital person in the JONES, interested in whatever amuses her.  She was on a black and blue striped blouse and dark milk leggings. Now tense, sweaty, wide-eyed which concentrated on finding Ariana, the source of her joy. Ari! she yelled again, Her voice was a bit louder this time, ARIANA was still lost in herself that she forked her way out of reality. Mrs Jones wondered why she wasn't answering or "maybe she isn't home or not feeling fine" she mumbled. "Ari, my baby"  Whispered Mrs Jones as the door opened gradually. Her low tender voice pierced every thought of Ariana until only the awareness of the voice persisted.  "Good afternoon mom", hope you haven't been standing there for long? she teased, with a grinded smile. Have been calling you for ages, Mrs Jones sneered. While she accelerated to the stringent bed.  Why didn't you answer to my calls, you got me wondering. Mrs Jones inquired. Sorry mom, was day dreaming, Ariana retorted looking funny. Seriously?..  About what she queried. About school life, she replied smiling. Oh really! day dreaming so deep in this unfriendly weather? asked Mrs Jones. Ariana grinded a smile, then giggled "yes mom, but so sad you had to cut me shot". Mrs Jones was a little startled for a while... The hilarity was getting to her, she wrinkled the smile, that invaded her chick, and gradually escalated to a loud laugh. "You haven't even seen your result yet!"... she teased. But i love your positivity though, she continued hilariously. Ariana stared passionately for a while, watching her mom smiled was giving her that syrupy awesome feeling which made her smile, then tagged in the hilariousity, that invaded her but didn't last long. "But mom, why were you haunting me earlier? and ended my lovely imaginary world, Ariana chuckled. With a creepy Stare. You this children of the 21st century... So should i go and get a written court permit before am allowed to check on my little princess?... Mrs Jones satirized.  *Ariana sighs*  Mom please don't start!, was just asking to know if it's was any urgency. And beside am no longer a little princess, she added smiling while migrating to sit beside Mrs Jones.  "Don't just go there little girl, as long as am still breathing you'd still be my little princess, Mrs Jones gushed then smiled which was rapidly followed by ARI with a loud laugh. Mom, So why'd you called earlier? ARI assented. Just wanted on check up on you, and by the way i haven't seen you today, i thought you'd still be a sleepy head as usual. Mrs Jones mimicked.  While they laughed again, the bond between them both was everlastingly sweet. I admire them sometimes, she's also my aunt too but we barely share that kind of bond she shares with ARIANA, maybe because i barely communicate about anything or Aunt just didn't noticed.             Ariana Jones, young beautiful girl, who just got into her twenties, she's the best prescription of an angel along with the smile of a goddess. she's light skin young lady, we share same height. She's a bit thicker, I'm more of a slimy.  She's an archetype being, honey personality and voice, always real and lively to mingle with, which i loved. She's just like a kid sister, she looks up to me, our relationship is slightly like that of twin's, sometimes i ask myself how did such a lovable seed came out from bridge?. I walked back up to moddy, sipping my glass of water as i accelerated closer. What took you so long? he tittered. His cell started ringing before i could say anything. Hey bro, moddy greeted, he stood up then walked towards the balcony.  I couldn't hear their conversation on the phone, it went on for like two minute. The last thing i heard was "sorry bro, i forget, just give me five minute". I guessed he probably had to go,  But i wasn't sure who he spoke to on the phone. *The call dropped* Are you suppose to be with someone?, i whispered, trying not to over-react. It's SAM, Moddy replied, am suppose to be at his place but i forgot, he wanted to talk to me about something, he added. *Looking at him i could tell he really had to go.* Okay, i mumbled. Hope you don't mind, he appealed?. Yeah am cool, go meet your buddy, i urged. Trying to smirk and sneer my face. We hugged then parted, he promise to call later in the day. Off he was. I was already thinking what i was gonna do all day, then i remembered i had dinner to prepare in few hours, so i decided to give an head start. *While at SAM'S place*... Bro what's up? Moddy greeted in there usual informal way. Am good man, you ditch me because of that babe of yours right? Sam teased.  it's nothing like that, we were just Gisting about some stuff, i reassured.  And that reminds me. She was about telling me something but all of a sudden she relented and switched the conversation, i continued. Sam stared at me, trying not to blurt out and laugh while i explained. Then he added, maybe she wanted to say something my dear friend couldn't have the ball to say, Sam mimicked then smirked his face which teased Moddy.  Moddy's face wrinkled, insinuating "must you add Gas to the already burning fire". I thought as much at first, but was sadden when she flicked or may-  *cut off*  Or maybe it's high time you man up and tell her yourself, Sam intercepted. It's not that easy and by the way you won't understand, i emphasized. And what won't i understand huh?, the fact that you love someone for years now and don't have the balls to talk to her, or at least get her involved. You can never tell she might even feel the same for you, Sam raged. Looking clipped and earnest to his word. It's not like i don't have the balls, i complained. What if i unveil my feelings to her and it isn't mutual? i asked.  *Silence captivated the atmosphere* I don't want anything trashing our friendship not even my emotions, Because i won't be able face myself then, Distancing myself from her won't go good for me, and i don't wanna go through that, i'd prefer my chance's as a friend, i maintained. That's the flimsy excuse you always give, Sam murmured.  *At least show her hint if she no gree show you, na here we go dey another guy go carry her go*  (Tran: show her hint if she doesn't show you, before some other dude does that before you) Sam teased.  That's not possible, The guy dey crazy? (Trans: is the guy crazy?) i gasped putting on a poisonous look. E go shock you, sam warned in pidgin.  (Trans; it's gonna shocker to you)  Then smiled at the pace of how my reaction changed on hearing there's a slight chance of losing ANN, am positive you could kill for that girl, sam muttered.             SAM GEORGE, young gigantic male, same age as Moddy, dark in complexion, a big nose which matched his enlarged eyes, multiple tattoos on his left hand. Scar on his left chick which he claimed, he had when he fell down from a stairs when he was little.  He lived with his parents who wasn't also available or home which contributed to his rough and gangster attitude even thou he wasn't, but he definitely lived like one. "I hope you got some blunt (weed) on you?", You just Spoilt my mood, i lamented. Take am easy bro, na talk we dey talk *in pidgin*  (Trans; take it easy, was just giving you the actually facts and you know it). Sam reassured, and besides i was only illustrating so you could act fast, he added.  *And why you dey ask for blunt{weed}, like say you be stranger or watin* (Trans; yo! why asking for blunt {weed} as if you some stranger or what? go serve yourself man) Sam guffawed, as he walked toward the fridge to get some alcohol. You know am never left without some blunts{weeds} on a weekend, Sam chuckled. Go serve yourself, he continued, wearing a devilish smile as if he was invoked with powers. I rambled closer to a wooden crafted reading desk, which had a hidden safe constructed at the side of it. Sam was already coming back with two drinking glasses, and a bottle of chilled whiskey, i sat side-ways rolling my blunt {weed} in a rolling paper, while Sam accelerated closer. He sat side ways too, facing me, placed the glasses on the table, pour some whiskey on them, served me a glass of half estimated measured whiskey.  "Thanks man," i gabbled while he took a zip from his whiskey. I thought she was about telling me what have been hoping to hear from her, but she just flinched and redirected the conversation as if she had a "last minute change of mind" or maybe she also had the fear of losing our friendship if i didn't feel the same way, just the way i feared. i attached sobbing then began to puff(smoke).  The air was tyrant bizarrely with smogs from the Vapours being redirected to the atmosphere by me. Forget about that, and chill the f**k out. Sam Shouted.  "Am leaving town for a few day" he revealed swaying his way into My head.