Tear of Ice

Chapter 12

As people loaded onto the ferry, Lia stayed by my side, gently keeping her body beside me with my hand sliding over her back. I look back, looking for familiar white hair and red eyes. Slowly I looked over at the people near the entrance only to see Rio leaning back on the carriage. His goofy grin as he waves, I wave back. Before turning back and walking behind the group of people.

Slowly, the group of people in front of us dispersed until it was only us and the guide leading us over to the back rooms of the ferry. With a quick courtesy bow, he gestures to the room door and I nod to him as he walks off and leaves us to open the door to the room. We soon walked in; the room was pretty small, but somehow rather clean. There was a single bed up against the wall with the foot of it facing the door, as well as two nightstands beside it, one holding some candles and the other with books. The window was in the corner, showing the river and mountains we’re surrounded by in all their glory.

I walk over to the bed and unhook my cloak, taking it off fully as Lia nudges the door fully closed, pressing the button on the knob to lock it. Then she turns to me and sits.

“So, what is it you wanted to talk about?”

I bite my lip and lean on my hands against the bed. “I need to air out some truths with you.”

Lia’s head tilts, a slight whimper coming out from her. “Carmine, we’ve literally known each other for practically all of our lives. Whatever you’re gonna tell me, better be pretty revolutionary.”

“Charming.” My tone flat as I look at her with stern eyes. Before I pull my cloak and place it on my lap, rubbing the red cloth softly as I fix my posture.

“Grandma and Icarus never told you how they found me, right?” She shakes her head.

“Never thought it mattered. You’re family.”

“And I told you already that I was born in Kreidd.” She nods again. “I thought I should tell you at least how I got to the Neigless.”

For a second, Lia stared at me, her matching blue eyes meeting mine before she inevitably looked away. Her tail lands on the ground with a soft thud, her paws tapping the floor a bit.

“Carmine, I don’t think you-”

“I took your father from you, you deserve to at least know this.” My eyes stared into her, before looking down and at the cloak in my lap. She went quiet; I didn’t want to see her reaction to that.

“My parents-birth parents- were Knights under Kreidd.” I fiddled with the cloak under my vision, “From what I remember, they were pretty devoted to the church of the state. And our family was pretty well known and loved in the system. For obvious reasons-” I look up a bit and touch my fiery red hair, too red, far too red to be of a normal human’s bloodline.

“Of course, with Loraine blood in our bloodline we were expected to do great things, and with both of my parents being decent ranking in the knights we were pretty well off.”

“You ‘lived the good life.’” She mutters, I nod.

“I don’t know what happened, and to be honest, I could almost care less now. But, my father had died somewhere along the line.” I shrug and cross my legs, leaning my hands under the cloak over my knees.

“My mother and I were devastated. For a while, she couldn’t even follow through with her duties as a knight. And, I guess, she couldn’t follow through on her duties as a mother either. Considering she sent me away to the Guecedand.”

“What?” Lia’s voice was soft and shocked by that.

I sigh, running a hand through my hair. “My mother one day woke me up around dawn, gave me my packed bags, and sent me on my way to a ferry. She never got on the ferry with me, and even as I screamed and cried for her to come with me or to take me home, she didn’t.”

“She just sent you away? Why? I don’t get it.” Lia looked down. “Parents love their kids right? Dad would’ve never-”at that she paused. “Then again he-”she stopped herself again, shaking her head and sitting on the ground.

“Lia, you don’t need to stop yourself.” I looked at her, my hands clenching the cloak.

“Carmine, I just-”

“I’ve been awful to you this whole time, Lia. I yelled at you, cornered you, and made it seem like you didn’t go through the same loss I had. And I’m sorry. I’m so sorry.”

She shakes her head, “I was supporting you. That’s what partners do.”

“Yes, and I am supposed to reciprocate that, not back you into a corner.” I look away and bite my lip. “Look, I know I’m still processing it all. But you need to let it out too. Talk to me, yell at me. Do whatever you have to do.”

When I finally look back up at her. Her eyes are wide and she actually keeps eye contact with me. I could see in her shaky paws she was a bit scared to do so.

“What’s wrong, Lia?”

“What if-” She pauses before looking away a little. “What if I hurt your feelings?”

I scoff a bit, “You never seemed too worried about that before.

“But I’m supposed to protect you.” she retorts.

“You’re not my mother Lia, you’re my sister. Don’t worry, I won’t take any of it to heart.” I pat my lap and uncross my legs as she walks closer. I pat the bed beside me and she walks around the side before jumping on with a loud creak as I turn to face her. I take her fluffy face in my hands and bring her eyes to mine again. Her eyes flicker to Icarus’ instinctively as I try my best to stay calm.

“You’re so strong Lia, You’ve been a pillar for me this entire time. Now you deserve to cry too.”

I watch her face shift as she shoves it into my skirt, Her paw on my lap as I pet her. The whimpers and small howls from her were so cracked and broken that I could barely keep my face straight.

“Why?” Her voice cracked, echoing into a howl. “Why did he do this? He said he would teach me longer! He said he would train me to be a real leader! A real protector! But he-he just!” Her words also came out as a bit of a growl, the raw anger and distress in it hurting my heart more than it already ached.

“I know, I’m sorry.” My voice was soft, not attempting to silence her.

I held her closer, her paws over my shoulder as she buried her face into my stomach. I lean myself over her, gently running my hand through her fur, hoping that this was enough. Lia has held this back for who knows how long.

“Lia, you did so well. You protected me and took care of me first.” The words pour from me, attempting to channel any of the comforting presence that Grandma and Icarus had.

“Icarus is proud of you. Rose is proud of you. I am proud of you” Her howls finally died down to whimpers, My skirt wet under her head as her body trembled under my hands. I sit up a bit, letting my hands run-up to her head.

“Lia, look at me.” I take her fluffy face in my hands our eyes meet.

“I ran from village to village. As people constantly gave up on trying to connect with me.” I look down a bit, my hands rubbing her face softly. “No space in their families and no patience to try to fit me in. Until I found Rose and Icarus. And you.”

She nuzzles my face, even as tears wetted her fur coat. “As I said, you’re family. Dad always worried for you and Rose. He loved you both so much.”

“And he loved you. He loved all of us, we were his family.” My eyes finally accepted the tears that I held back as I took a shaky breath. “I’m so sorry, I took him away.”

“You didn’t! He made his decision!” I sigh.

“Carmine, you and I both know that Rose wouldn’t have been able to contain Wiesse’s power any longer. If you died, so would the Wolf Ringer all together.”

I sigh, “I will sacrifice just as she, for my love is bigger than I.” The mantra of Wiesse. “He really was Wiesse’s child.”

Lia nuzzles me as she tries to collect herself again.

“Wiesse is what we must protect and she’s the whole reason our family came together. So let's get ready to save her.” I nod, as my eyes drag away from Lia.

She leans into my vision and tilts her head. I cup her fluffy cheeks and wiggle my hands around.

“I wish Grandma told me more about this. She didn’t prepare me at all to handle doing all of this without her.”

Lia hums, leaning into my touch. “They really didn’t tell us anything. Rose dying-”

My hand tenses as I pull them off of her face. “Even in life, I… I wonder if I ever truly got to know her. She never talked to me about anything other than the family or Wiesse. But… If she lived for at least 200 years, then-”

Lia blinks, and looks away, as if she just realized that goes for Icarus as well.

“Maybe they really believed in us, that they didn’t want us to do what they did.”

Sighing, I drag my hand over her paw. “I don’t really know what I should do.”

“Well for now, getting Wiesse back is what we should do!” Lia’s other paw comes over my hand. Her grin was infectious, even as it slowly faded as she leaned into me.

“Are you okay, Lia?”

“I will be. We will be, I guess.” I snort a bit at that response.

“Very hopeful.” Her paw pushes my shoulder, a little snicker coming out of her.

“Let’s start trying to come up with a plan.” I pet her as she shakes her head a bit.

“Yeah, What do you think we can expect in Kreidd?”

I hum as I think. “We are going to the capital of Kreidd. And Illiar definitely won’t be the same from 10 years ago.” My hand goes to my chin. “Knowing the knights, the tear would be in their base-with their commander.”

“Rio did mention that they are on the brink of war right now. So they are probably preparing to use it to attack.” Lia says.

“Even though they can’t use it. So we have that in our favor. But they have rifles. And we have magic, most of it volatile.”

“Going into a knight base without you having some kind of grasp on your powers is a risk, Carmine. A very stupid risk.”

“Well, we don’t have time for me to sit back and learn the inside and outs of being a Loraine.” I lean back and hold out my hand, focusing on it as crystal blues slowly begin to form. Before a small crystal of ice floats above my hand.

“You’re getting better, but not enough to fight trained knights.”

Clenching my fist as the ice fades away and I let out a sigh. “Then I will have to rely on you.”

“You say that like it’s a bad thing. Haven’t you been relying on me this whole time?” She readjusts her paws and puffs out her chest a bit.

I look down a bit, “I took advantage of that this whole time.”

“Hey,” She leans forward and nuzzles my cheek as I scoff against the movement. “We’re partners. We protect and support each other. Just like Dad and Rose.”

Nodding again until Lia spoke up, “So how are we gonna get into the base? Doubt they just let us walk in.”

“Sneaking around is our best bet. Distracting guards and things like that. ”

“I mean, if that's our best bet, sure. But will we really be able to do that around trained knights?”

“Don’t know. But-” I cross my arms, before my hand rises up to my eye. “Wait-”

“What?” Lia tilted her head.

“When they attacked, when I was shot. I remember the captain saying sorry.”

Lia scoffs, “The hell? Sorry for wh-” she silences as I hold out my hand to her.

“Let me finish,” I adjust my crossed arms, “He said sorry to Vassard.”

Lia tilts her head at that, “Vassard is my last name.”

“You make me feel like I know nothing about you, you know that?”

“I don’t like talking about it. And I know my true family. But that doesn’t mean I can’t use it to my advantage.”

“Easier way to sneak in without having to fight. I’m game to try. But if it falls through, let me handle the fighting, okay?”

I stare at her for a minute as she stares back. Slowly our gazes get sharper and sharper. A growl bubbles from her gut as she leans closer to me as I scoff. Shoving her head into the mattress as her body flails and tail waves back and forth quickly. “Fine, fine! You win! I’ll fall back and let you protect me.”

“Good.” It was extremely muffled by the mattress. As I let her go she rises up and shakes her head as her fur fluffs up.

“So that’s our plan? Use my family name to get us in the base, get to the commander. Maybe wave some Loraine magic around, grab the tear and go?”

Lia hums, nodding as I talk. “Pretty much. Keep it vague, easier to adapt when things go wrong.”

“No wonder Rio got annoyed at us.” I snorted. “Icarus would be so annoyed too.” I pet Lia again as she lets out the smallest laugh.

“I know, but I guess we’re not much of the planning type.”

“You’re a bad influence on me.” She sticks out her tongue and I reciprocate. As I lay back on the bed letting out a deep breath.

“We’re finally going to get Wiesse.” I feel her weight slowly lean onto my torso, her head laying on the mattress.

“We’ll be home soon enough. We’ll give them a proper funeral.” Lia whispers against the mattress under us. My hand absentmindedly rubs her head for some sense of comfort.

“Yeah.” She trails off and turns her head away from me and I feel her body tremble a bit. A huff leaving her as she relaxes on my stomach. I continue to pet her and use my other hand to cover my eyes. Her gentle trembling reverberates over me as I feel my own breathing turn shallow. My eyes become watery as the hand above them clenches.

I cleared my throat from the lump that grew in it, “I’m sorry.” It still came out choppy as I tried to ignore the tear rolling down my cheek.

“I’m sorry too.” I heard her reply, as I felt her shake and my skirt also get just a little wetter.

I closed my eyes and continued to pet my sister for as long as I could while I was awake. We will get Wiesse back.

We can get through this. We’re family after all.