The Boy That stayed

Chapter 8- MEMORIES

One evening, I sat on the edge of my bed and looked through an old photograph of Dad.

It was one of the few I had.

I traced my finger over his face.

"I miss you."

The words came out quietly.

I had said them so many times that they almost felt like a prayer.

I put the picture back.

Then I looked at myself in the mirror.

I didn't recognize the girl staring back at me.

She looked older.

Tired.

Guarded.

Like someone who had learned too early that love could hurt.

I wondered what Dad would have thought of me.

Would he have been disappointed?

Would he have understood?

Would he have told me to keep going?

I didn't know.

But I knew I couldn't stay broken forever.

I just didn't know how to fix myself.

By the end of senior year, I had become almost completely disconnected from everyone around me.

I wasn't bullied every day.

I wasn't constantly being whispered about.

The school had eventually found something else to talk about.

But the damage had already been done.

The whispers had stopped.

My fear hadn't.

I still felt watched.

I still felt exposed.

I still couldn't trust anyone.

And I still didn't have a friend.

Tessa had left a space in my life that nobody else had filled.

Maybe nobody ever would.

I packed my books into my bag on the final day of classes.

Everyone around me was celebrating.

People were hugging.

Taking pictures.

Talking about what they would do next.

I stood quietly among them.

I didn't feel happy.

I didn't feel sad either.

I just felt tired.

I walked out of the school gates for what I knew would be one of the last times.

I stopped for a moment and looked back.

That building had once been my whole world.

Now I couldn't wait to leave it behind.

I had lost so much there.

My friendship.

My trust.

A part of myself.

And I didn't know if I would ever get those things back.

As I walked home, one thought kept repeating itself in my mind.

Will I ever trust anyone again?

I didn't have an answer.

Maybe that was the saddest part.

I had spent years believing that people couldn't be trusted and I was finally proven right.

And as I stepped through the front door, I had no idea that the next chapter of my life was already waiting for me.

And I was afraid to find out what it would be.