The Former Mrs. Tan

The First Kiss

IT WAS ALREADY PAST EIGHT in the morning when Billy passed by my workstation.

"Hey, you're still here," he said as he put his weight on the divider.

"I'm just finishing this report, Sir," I said as I continued typing and staring at my monitor.

"Cut that 'Sir'," he said. "Just call me Billy." 

"Sorry," I said.

"Have you eaten breakfast?" he asked. "Come on, let's eat, my treat. I'm starving."

"I have to finish this first," I said.

"Come on, you can get back to it later," he said as he pulled my hands away from the keyboard.

He pressed some keys on the keyboard to lock my computer. I laughed at his persistence. He was the boss after all.

We could have eaten as some restaurant nearby but Billy drove his car farther down south. 

We stopped by a newly opened restaurant that prides itself on homemade meals. The restaurant was small; it looked like an old living room converted into a cozy diner. We had a hearty breakfast and a lively chat.

Back on the car, he was about to start the engine when he said, "I've been observing that you're going home later each night," he started. "I asked Herbert awhile ago and he said that you're becoming dedicated with your work."

"Did he really say that?" I asked.

He nodded. "Is there a problem between the two of you?" 

I shook my head. 

He didn't start the engine. Instead, he put his right arm around my shoulders.

"Tell me," he said. "Are you overwhelmed by your work?"

"No," I answered. "It's just that…" 

I looked at him. He was waiting for me to continue. 

"…I'm starting to feel better at the office rather than at home. Please, don't get me wrong, Billy. I love my family. I love the kids. They're sweet."

"How about Herbert? Do you still love him?"

I couldn't answer. I bowed my head to avoid his stare. 

He took my chin up using his other hand. "Irene, if you really love him, you shouldn't be here," he said. "You're not being honest with your feelings."

He kissed me lightly on the lips. It felt so sweet and warm. I welcomed him with my hungry mouth; hungry for something sensual like this. My hands held his face and slid down to his shoulders. I felt his tongue entered my mouth and I realized I wanted to go farther with him. But I pushed away, breaking the kiss. He was surprised.

"I'm sorry, this is all wrong," I said and straightened out my blouse.

I immediately opened the car and went out. I ran to hail the first cab I could see and rode back to the office crying.