Alpha's Adopted Mage

Guardian Queen

Evelina Pov:

Three months ago, my life had changed and I had found my mate. However, my past keeps creeping up. I couldn't give permission to Alex to finish the mate bond. I have made some progress, the make-outs with Alex are wonderful and I pride myself on that! I, Evelina Fort, was able to kiss a man freely. Alex was a great man, a fantastic father, honorable, intelligent, strong and very s**y. But everytime his hands would move to a certain space in my body. I would flinch. It's not like I don't want him to continue, I do very much! I just don't know how to block out the memories of what Mara and I went through in Kara's dungeon, the abuse and violence of it. I haven't even told him about my scar yet. I know soon I'll have to tell him. I have a mental block stopping me. Just as I'm about to say something about it, my mouth clamps up and I hold all of it in or I start crying. He knows I've been abused and he doesn't rush me.

He's been so patient with me even though he's shared everything with me. I know his mother died in a rogue attack and his father committed suicide to be with her. Making Alex an Alpha two months before his 18th birthday. Matt's parents helped with the transition and becoming second parents to him. When rogues attacked five years later, the pack suffered sliver poisoning. The rogues had dumped it in the pack's water system. The pack lost many members that day, including Matt's parents and Matt's younger sister. Iduna lost her brother during the attack too, but he died from being ripped apart by a rogue. I have never released how many years the werewolves have been fighting. Ten years to be exact, and that seemed such a long time. The Mage War was only for five years and that felt like a lifetime to me.

Tonight is Joe Cooper's birthday and he will be getting his wolf. I was invited to it. Being excited about seeing him change for the first time was a bit of an understatement. I've never seen a wolf shift for the first time and now I get too. I've seen all the adults shift but this was way different. They have an actual party! Then friends and family help guide the new wolf when he or she begins shifting. According to Alex, the first time is very painful, but it's easier with the pack or loved ones. Then they go for a run with their family and friends for the first time and, according to Alex, randomly howling at the moon.

I know it's time to tell Alex about Bella's blood father but telling him about it will be revealing my secret as well. I needed to decide how to go by telling him this though. Scolding myself for taking so long. We were running out of time and the Elder council wouldn't take "no" for much longer. They were so bent out of shape about the pack not having a Luna, yet. Alex keeps telling them that he's busy rebuilding Brigdewood, which really isn't a lie. Also, we have more wolves that have joined the pack, which is great. Three weeks after being here, Brigewood people that were werewolves and even magic users joined the pack. We had a ceremony and everything. I even joined! As soon as everything is complete, I'll be having my Luna ceremony. Then we can relieve everything to the council.

Alex, Bella, and I have been walking hand in hand towards the training area. Alex was wearing black jeans and a white polo shirt. He was carrying Bella, who we had dressed up in a light little green dress, green slippers, and she was sporting her new little headband. I wore a simple strapless white sundress that had sliver ribbon weaved in it. I had brown sandals to reveal sliver pained-toe nails to match my fingers. I was carrying Joe's birthday present that I had wrapped up in a glittery blue wrapping paper and on the top I put the biggest white bow I could find. We've been decorating the area for the last few days. The pack had even helped decorate and prepare the meal for tonights celebration.

When we arrived, there were beautiful dull blue lights everywhere, making them look like little fireflies. Dark blue table cloths that had little crescent moons all over them were laid down on all the picnic tables. Long tables in the back had food and desserts lined in a beautiful display with variety of flowers, bows, and balloons. The alcohol was already flowing to all the adults. Little music was filtering into the night. People were laughing and dancing. The teens were trying to sneak out some beer or flexing their muscles to compare. I even saw a few flirting with each other.

Alex made his way to the kids' play pen and put her in with all the other little kids. He gave her, her toys, putting her down on her bottom. Bella has recently been sitting on her own but still needs help with it for the first few minutes. But once she was up, the little girl was up and could normally hold her own. When she had settled in, she looked up at Alex, and with a cheeky grin started repeating, "Da, Da, Da!" Alex smiled back at her and gave her a quick little kiss on the forehead. Then he turned around and started walking towards me. I watched Bella giggle a bit and reach for her favorite teething ring.

When Alex got to me, I asked him, "Can you believe how big she's getting?"

He smiled, "Yep, sitting now! Crawling next."

I shivered, "We really need to hurry and start baby proofing everything."

"Agreed," he said and pulled me in to a hug, with a quick kiss on the lips, "Want anything to drink?"

"Sure, no alcohol though" I said to him with a smile.

I was watching him leave when I was suddenly tackled. Falling hard on my butt, looking down to see how my attacker was, a little red hair with very fluffy curls and crystal gray eyes looking back at me.

"Dylon!" his sister yelled at him, coming up to us and pulling him off me.

"Sorry, Luna." She apologized, she had the same color as her brother except her hair was very long, just passed her shoulder blades.

"It's okay, Callie. No harm done." I answered, brushing the dirt off, "However, I'm not Luna yet. So just call me Evie."

Her eyes narrowed but she nodded, whispering something into the boy's ear. The boy turned around and said, "I'm sorry, Luna."

Before I could comment again, he turned and ran off.

Callie sighed, "That boy."

I laughed, "A handful, uh?"

Callie looked at me and nodded, "Can we talk for a moment?"

"Sure" I replied.

She led me to the other side of the party and took a bench where nobody could hear us.

"I need to talk to you." she started, "At Bridgewood, I never really got to know you. Dylon and I were only there for protection and to hide. I never let Dlyon and I leave the house unless we needed too. I was scared my parents would open the front door, or see me at work, or when I shopped for supplies. I was even checking around corners. I was constantly scared of everything."

I nodded, swallowing some bile rising up in my throat, "Yes, I understand."

She looked at me with cool eyes, "I used to envy you, you know? Both of you and Mara. I thought, look at them! They were abused just like me, but look at them! Their strong and tough just going on with their lives. Then we moved here and I met Zack. And I found happiness. Dylon is starting to act like a real kid again. I've opened up to other people as well! Zack and I are mated and bonded with each other. Life could be better!"

I smiled at her, "I'm happy you found your place here and that you're happy."

She turned around and glared at me. I was taken back by the site. Why was she angry at me?

"So my question is, why aren't you happy? " She asked me.

The question took me off guard and I didn't know how to answer that. Am I not happy, I asked myself? A few minutes had ticked by. No, I realized. I looked back at Callie and had to blink a few times.

Finally, she demanded, "Why?"

"I.. I don't know?" I choked.

Callie took my hands and looked me in the eyes, "Where is that strong lady I admire? Why are you not mated to Alex? I know he makes you happy. I've seen it! Bits and pieces show through when you think nobody is watching. Yet, you put a wall up and pretend everything is okay. Why?"

Feeling tear down my cheek. Was I crying? I can't believe I haven't noticed all this pain in me. I can't believe I didn't sense being watched. Normally, I can, but I have also been blocking my telephathic abilities. I couldn't get the content voices to stop. Everyone talking with their minds and the werewolves wolves where also wanting to be heard. It was just too much, I had cut the link between all of them, even Chase. I can't believe I'm just starting to notice this. I looked back at her and couldn't give her any answers. I just felt lost.

"Open up" Callie said, "Tell me what your feeling. It will help. Zack did this for me and now I'm doing it for you. We deserve to be happy."

"I feel lost!" I cried, looking back at her,

"I don't belong here," I told her.

I was pretty surprised by this. Did I really think I didn't belong here?

"You do belong here, with Bella and Alex, with this pack. Evie, you are not a replacement," she said sternly.

That was it, wasn't it? I feel like I was a replacement. This wasn't my life, this life was supposed to be Mara's. I cried even more and louder this time.

Callie lifted up my head, "You and Mara, we're both mates to Alex. Did you know that? Alex would have two mates if both of you survived."

"What?" I gasped.

"Werewolves sometimes have two mates. You and Mara did everything together, shared everything together, sister's of the heart, and mated as one." she said with a little smile, "Mara knew of her mate bond because it was easier for her to forget and forgive. She had opened herself up and was trying to start a new life. Leaving everything else in the past. Evie, you haven't forgiven yourself or anybody yet. You still have this wall built so high that nobody can break it down."

She took a breath, "You feel it, don't you? The attraction, the little shock wave and tingles, but it isn't intense is it?'

I shook my head "no".

"Let it go, Evie. It's in the past, talk about it with your Alpha. You belong at his side. You are his mate and you are Bella's mother just as much as Mara was."

She was right! I blamed everything on myself, for being caught by Kara, for not being able to get out sooner from our prison, not protecting Mara, blaming myself for Alex's lost mate, and for Bella's mom, who she will never know. There was so much of it that I didn't think I deserved happiness. I didn't know I was taking away happiness from others. Instead, I pushed them and my happiness away. I didn't know that I always belonged here. The only thing that was missing was Mara. We were supposed to be part of this together and Kara took that way from us!

It wasn't my fault, I told myself, but hers! Mara's twin! Everything we suffered, every beating we ordealed, and all the killings we had to watch. Was Kara's fault! Not mine! I looked up at Callie and hugged her.

"Thank you!" I cried again,"Thank you so much!"

She hugged me harder. I don't know how long we sat there, but when I wiped my tears away. A pain spread through my chest. I gasped, putting my hand there. I felt the heat just for a few seconds, then both the heat and pain were gone. I looked up at Callie. She was grinning from ear to ear. She reached into her purse and pulled out her tiny makeup mirror. She opened it and showed me. My chest sported a new marking on me. Just above my heart was a new symbol. I didn't think I would ever see one on myself. Bella maybe, but not me. The symbol was a flaming sword like Bella's but on top of the hilt was a crown.

I looked back at Callie and noticed she was laughing. Putting down her mirror, she hugged me again. This time she whispered in my ear, "All hail Guardian Queen!"

She pulled back and laughed out, "Tell your mate, lower your walls, claim what belongs to you, and you can talk to me about anything and everything. Whenever you want, my friend. I'm here for you, Luna."